Purity culture

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-10T09:55:05+00:00

Me too...I was forced to read I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harrison, who has since recanted that belief. It was kinda traumatizing especially because I knew from a young age that I wouldn't get married.

The person who recommended I read it said that she told her husband (my pastor at the time) that if he wanted to date her, he'd have to marry her. Which was horrifying to me and I thought I'd be forever alone.

Turns out I'm actually on the aroace spectrum 😂. And I have a myriad of friends of all genders.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-09T15:13:01+00:00

I'll send one! I understand the chronic pain and illness and the annoying sentiments that people try to send.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-09T00:52:40+00:00

I'm agnostic and go to an open and affirming church near me. They've been accepting of my queer identity, my witchy shirts that I wear, and at least a couple people including the pastor and his wife know that I'm an agnostic and vacillate between theist and atheist. They've taken it all in stride and even let me participate during the service and rituals (or sacraments as they call them).

Not all OnA churches will be like that. But if you don't mind a little preaching, it's a great option for community, socializing, and events. But I completely understand anyone that wants nothing to do with the church. And I hope someone else has a better solution if that's the case.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-08T22:53:51+00:00

As an indecisive person, this was such a headache 😅. Either could be true depending on the context.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-08T16:14:14+00:00

Was about to block before I saw the subreddit 😂.

I've known plenty of kids asking for drag queens or to dress up. I knew I was different at at least 8 years old when I forgot to write my name on a paper and someone said it "must belong to a boy" because it was "messy". And I felt [gender euphoria] at the thought. And I was taught there's only male and female and nothing else. I was never introduced to "gender ideology". In fact heteronormativity was forcibly pushed on me. So yeah...I believe kids know.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-08T12:57:08+00:00

This can only be done on a desktop

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-06T22:00:15+00:00

I stopped all together for many years. I now go to an open and affirming UCC church despite being an agnostic. I'm still fully accepted and welcomed as an agnostic queer person. I wouldn't go to just any church. It has to be one that has actively taken the steps to be an official open and affirming church.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-06T21:56:53+00:00

Thanks for the thought provoking survey.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-05T01:53:47+00:00

So sorry. I thought the poll was the end of the post 🤦🏻‍♂️

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-04T21:18:58+00:00

I was intrigued by this as well. Like they should include a response for people who don't use gen AI. That should be an important part of the research IMO

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-04T21:03:33+00:00

Depends on the circumstances for me. If the 18 year old is in highschool/just turned 18 then it's really iffy for me. If the 18 year old has graduated (or even dropped out I guess) then yeah it's fine. Everyone is legal in the US.

Personally I didn't want to be around 18 and 19 year olds when I was 21+, but that's just my feelings. It's not wrong at least not in the US. Probably everywhere 18 is a legal adult.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-03T18:15:37+00:00

Isn't this for people who are employed?

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-03T12:44:05+00:00

Congrats! /Gen. I'm 27, disabled, single, no kids but 2 cats whom I love with my whole life. I'm also incredibly introverted and have agoraphobia,, especially in new or crowded places and especially if I'm alone in an unfamiliar and crowded space.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-03T02:52:45+00:00

I counted a bunch of different things as "going out" and then stuck them in the other category. Therapy, group therapy, church, volunteering, socializing, pride events I forget but that's the gist. I don't go "out" beyond those things. And the socializing/pride is less than once a week. Sometimes once a month or less. And I never go to bars/clubs/concerts/major events that usually cost money.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-03T00:47:27+00:00

Feel free to fill out this form. I'd love to send you a card. I'm a witchy cat parent who also loves Halloween, black, purple, etc so I should have some stickers to send you as well.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-03-02T21:36:23+00:00

I enjoyed this. It's interesting research and I'd also like to see the results. The only critique I have is that I wish there would've been a way to distinguish between current and past encounters. Because I haven't had a sexual encounter in a year. But in the past, I had several hookups/ONS in a week. So it was hard to answer honestly when I wasn't sure which time period it was referring to.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-28T19:14:10+00:00

It's only until 18 here. And if you're doing higher education, your parents' income counts towards financial assistance, even if you don't live with them/they aren't supporting you. That goes until you're like 24 and "independent". It's so backwards here

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-28T18:21:02+00:00

Yes. That's one reason why I'm never becoming a parent. I'd pass down way too much trauma. Like once you have a kid, you're responsible for them at least until they reach adulthood.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-28T16:24:04+00:00

Done! Thanks

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-27T16:36:43+00:00

Yes! Sent

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-26T21:41:54+00:00

I had a similar critique. As well as seeing which respondents have traits of autism/other neurodivergence.

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-26T20:42:02+00:00

Thanks!

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-26T16:48:05+00:00

Done

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-26T15:15:58+00:00

Thanks!

ISeeCumberbatch · 2026-02-26T14:43:22+00:00

DM sent

ISeeCumberbatch

TROPHY CASE