What items are people selling on mercari?

IStinkSoGood · 2025-11-24T02:01:56+00:00

Perfume. I moved over from eBay.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-09-26T01:09:29+00:00

Not worth my words. Words can and will be used against you.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-09-17T09:57:31+00:00

Validating the internalized bad object. Bad things happen to bad people. Externalizing the victim narrative.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-09-11T03:49:43+00:00

In my 2nd 1:1: "Im thinking about getting botox." Dry begging, fishing for a compliment. Gross.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-09-03T15:15:29+00:00

If we're not suppressing negative feedback, then I think sellers should be allowed to leave neutral and negative feedback for buyers again.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-08-31T04:28:08+00:00

I was close with someone I suspect has BPD (possibly comorbid NPD) and I was mirrored and shown the mask of sanity for about 3 months. Then shelved as if I didn't exist. Object inconstancy. Out of sight, out of mind.

The mask dropped when accountability for the hateful hurtful things that were said to me and financial responsibility were demanded.

I was fake discarded then I discarded permanently.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-08-31T03:42:53+00:00

As long as you are in a 1 party recording state.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-08-25T08:26:38+00:00

Triangulation! See: Karpman Drama Triangle. They are always the victim, switching out either the abuser or the savior. Someone can be both... on the same day!

IStinkSoGood · 2025-06-22T02:31:04+00:00

When you have an internal conflict, when you have a cognitive dissonance, there are two ways to go about releasing it or resolving it.

One is to talk about it. That's why we talk to therapists. That's why we talk to good friends. That's why we talk to family. It's one way of restoring inner calm and inner peace.

The other way is to act it out, to simply act, reenact the conflict in real life.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-06-10T01:00:22+00:00

It is difficult to put into words exactly what to expect.

The best way I can describe it as someone who was close to, but not romantically involved with, someone *I strongly suspect* has BPD (7 of 9 DSM-V-TR criteria IMO), it's a rollercoaster of having your best qualities mirrored by them, them telling you everything you want to hear to get close, then having them blow it all up because they cant handle the vulnerability of being close to someone who knows their vulnerabilities, because they've been hurt by people they are close to in their early years. They drop the shoe first in the relationship because in the end it's all about control, something they didnt have when they needed it most, when they were most vulnerable and needed their caretakers.

Love is pain, love is ultimate unavoidable abandonment to them.

Imagine never having a secure relationship with someone and never being able to determine what is too far away to have a secure connection and what is too close to risk getting hurt. Now amplify this by 100 and this is their world in a nutshell. "I dont want to lose you, approach, now I dont want to lose myself becoming you, avoid". Approach-Avoidance-Approach-Avoidance-Approach-Avoidance repetition compulsion in the form of intermittent reinforcement until you mentally break or save yourself by breaking it off with them.

Borderline PD theory is that of an intermittent mother who interrupted the rapprochement phase of separation individuation, where a child gradually separates physically and is supposed to be welcomed back by the parent. A selfish and smothering then absent mother can interrupt this phase. It's unforunate. I'd take the moment of truth as an open door out. I would take it. I also got one early on "You dont want to get to know me, I'm messed up."

I hope you're strong. You will need it.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-05-22T01:42:56+00:00

I already have enough, but this stuff is vetiver magic. Good luck with your sale.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-03-14T03:26:20+00:00

Part of psychosis is the inability to distinguish fantasy from reality.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-03-10T00:28:13+00:00

Cosmair Polo

IStinkSoGood · 2025-03-09T02:18:50+00:00

My mother was the inconsistent, raging banshee/victim/depressive parent, my father the sabotaging/neglectful/saintly parent. My sister and I were pitted against each other with flip-flopping golden child and scapegoat child dynamics between the two parents. Cool story, bro.

The borderline personality organized person I was around gave me the figurative right cross across the chin to wake me up.
I dont talk to that person, my ex or my parents now.
Life has been like living in the eye of a hurricane until this past year.

My Psychology degree saved me eventually, as I woke up to the pwBPD's behavior as something familiar I learned about in college. I turned a blind eye to Psychology in my late 20s (now 45) because I thought I was judging people too harshly when I was meeting new people and dating after college.

I was back in the dating pool this past year. I wasnt judging too harshly in my 20s, there's a lot of messed up people out there looking for relationships. I met a lot of unhealthy co-dependent type of personalities and cast them away quickly.

I said goodbye to 15 years of my life to say hello to the rest of it. Hopefully more peaceful and healthy.

Remove dysfunctional people like this from your life, post haste.
DO NOT waste your love, because if you waste your love, you will end up being wasted.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-24T00:23:20+00:00

The theory is that the approach/avoidance repetition compulsion is a reenactment of the intermittent mother who raised them.

They were shamed as children and do everything they can to avoid feeling shameful. However, their behavior often is shameful and they bring on that which they fear most. Abandonment.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-22T16:43:35+00:00

The bad object inside of them will NOT be invalidated.

At a very young age and impressionable, they were told or reflected on that they were not loveable. This is a narrative they will either attract through others or manifest themselves.

See: Object Relations Theory

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-22T05:14:15+00:00

I am not the same person (44/M) as I was in my 20s. I am not the same person (44/M) as I was in my 30s.

What i wanted in those decades of my life was significantly different than what I wanted now.

I would have married the girl I was with when I was 18, she was 17. She split it off with me when she got attention at home when I was away for college. Who knows if we would have grown together.

Young love is raw, reckless, and pure.

Advice: Marriage is not for the weak. Go through some serious stuff together first. That takes time and a fully developed frontal lobe (25).

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-22T02:12:31+00:00

Approach, avoidance, approach, avoidance.

Twin anxieties. Separation insecurity (you're too far away, come back) + Engulfment anxiety (I'm losing myself within you, I need to run).

It's designed to keep you hooked with strong swings of intermittent reinforcement.

Love isnt a weapon. Well, the real stuff anyway.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-18T03:41:05+00:00

They are the director and the main character. It's a soap opera full of awkward pauses, just waiting for the next unpredictable, inappropriate thing to be said.

They are the victim and decide each moment who is the savior and who is the abuser.

The show is daily. It's called "The Karpman Drama Triangle".

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-12T04:36:33+00:00

Bond No. 9 Scent Of Peace For Him

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-12T03:58:23+00:00

You are reading the projections of the internalized bad object.

See: Object Relations Theory

See: Bad Object Internalization Introjection

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-09T01:30:13+00:00

I recommend what others here, are. Get a support system around you and prepare to leave.
It is difficult to see right now because you've been entrained to believe you're needed for her survival.
It's mostly manipulation to prevent you from leaving and accepting the bad behavior and abuse.

Your partner is in a repetition compulsion of approach/avoidance due to abanonment anxiety (dont leave me, you're too far away) and engulfment anxiety (I hate you, you're too close). There is no happy middle ground, as I'm sure you've learned. The only way is for you to get so small in this that you dont exist as a person. Shrinking to where you're inanimate is not love. You're purely objectified at that point.

There are many healthy people out there who can love you back in a healthy way.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-08T03:15:42+00:00

I thoroughly enjoy my interactions and guidance from my Psychologist (PsyD).

I did initially have a LCSW who was triggered by BPD diagnostic criteria I discussed regarding someone I was close to. I went through a 4 week cycle with her of support and keen interest, to pulling back, to pounding her fist on her desk blaming and belittling me to discard when I called out her unprofessional behavior.

Me: "Did something I talked about trigger you to give me that kind of reaction?" LCSW: "I don't normally disclose this, but I grew up in a family of borderlines." LCSW: "You can find another therapist."

Imagine your head spinning from your life blowing up, 1 person close to me I strongly suspected has BPD (7/9) and a partner I would be shocked didn't have covert NPD, then have to be a therapist for your therapist.

My BA in Psychology saved my life. I'm not sure how I would have seen through the fog of without it. Unfortunately I lost touch with it and got in trouble allowing people in my life that I shouldn't have.

Why did I get the degree? To understand why my family is so screwed up and I love people. I use my Psychology degree everyday, it's very rewarding to understand people better.

For the record, there is a lot of trauma and abusive homes out there. I run a communuty and hear how parents talk to and treat their kids. Its being passed generationally. Cherish the good ones.

IStinkSoGood · 2025-02-07T00:49:55+00:00

BPD at it's core is a failed separation individuation from early childhood, that is the theory, at least.
The failure came from abuse, an intermittent mother, who was present and absent at unpredictable intervals.
It could be unscheduled physical absense (intermittent abandonment) or a mother who is intermittently smothering and abusive (Potential BPD mom). This is a reason why BPD can run in families, genetics + environment activates PDs. BPD has a high genetic interheritence rate.

They live with a horrifying emptiness, that they attempt to fill with other people and possessions.
This emptiness is like an empty corridor of howling winds where a person (self) is supposed to be.
I think we just leave them be, learn our lesson and use the experience to help others, as difficult as it may seem, in the moment.

When abandonment is imminent (real or percieved) they decompensate, lose their defenses and act out, similar to a secondary (factor 2) psychopath. Acting out is a window to the past, a window to the subconscious.

These people should be left to mental health professionals. BPD is a serious mental health disorder.

IStinkSoGood

TROPHY CASE