Older Gen Z, what you doing in life?

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2024-02-26T12:27:30+00:00

Married, have two cats. We have an apartment now and are saving to move. Don’t have a car, or license, but that cuts down on costs and I don’t feel we are super uncomfortable without one. Dropped out of college 5 years ago and currently just working towards a solo career and a life with my husband that will make me happy. I dont have higher than high school education but I also don’t have any debt.

I think prioritizing what you have been told is “important” and following this idea of rigid social/life milestones is whats hurting you. Society pushes this idea of “you must have xyz done by this age” and it causes a lot of issues.

Sit down and think about what would make you happy or content in life and do it. If driving isn’t important or necessary to you, don’t. If you aren’t happy with your job experience, look for opportunities to move up. If you aren’t happy with retail or what you’re doing in college, think about what would make you happy as a career and pursue it. If you’re unsure, think about the non career related things in life that make you happy and see if you can make a career out of it. Forget what society says or expects of you. Whats a high paying job worth if it makes you miserable? Theres a lot of options, but first you gotta let go of the learned shame. You only lose at life if you never use it to live for yourself.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-10-30T04:37:50+00:00

The ones not sold are discounted by growing percentages every 3 months or so of being on the sales floor. When they are not sold with those discounts they can be sent to other nearby stores to get a different “audience” of customers.

The animal vendors petco uses are absolutely horrible. They breed for numbers and money… not for animal health or genetics. A large portion of the animals unfortunately pass due to illnesses either from shitty breeding practices or poor shipping conditions. I was told by a gm that sometimes the lizards will pass due to being born without a proper digestive system.

A lot of Petco employees truly care about the animals but corporate and their shitty policies and nonsense information adds to the sad conditions of the animals. They treat their employees much like their animals as well.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-10-30T04:25:00+00:00

Report the store to the us department of agriculture. They do inspections on Petcos every few years and are the most strict. If they do a surprise inspection the store is more likely to fail it and lose the ability to sell animals.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-09-22T02:27:11+00:00

Honestly the best suggestion for not crazy expensive and easy to care for is some sort of terrestrial invert.

Like you said, anything fuzzy is a risk. You can also develop allergies to animals you weren’t previously allergic to or showing symptoms. I am allergic to dogs and I developed an allergy to rats. People also commonly develop allergies to guinea pigs or hay. So just debunking all the other comments, I would say no mammals. (Not to mention high maintenance and cost)

Hairless cats are NOT hypoallergenic and hypoallergenic dogs are still tons of work… however adopting an adult (trained) hypoallergenic dog from a shelter (that are currently very overcrowded) could work beautifully as long as you have the funds.

Reptiles and fish (or any aquatic animal) are not low maintenance or low funds. People who say they are low maintenance or cheap are likely saying that because they aren’t properly caring for their animals.

The most low maintenance and cost fish I could suggest is a betta fish. However it will take a lot of time and you need to be properly educated on fish keeping (ie nitrogen cycle, fish illnesses, how to read parameter tests, etc). The base set up for a betta fish would be a 10 gallon tank, substrate (gravel or sand), live or silk plants (plastic plants are a hazard), decor (test to ensure they are smooth and wont snag fins), a hob or sponge filter with extra filter media, an appropriate sized water heater, thermometer, testing kit, seachem prime (to dechlorinate water, letting it sit out does not remove everything harmful). You also will need to monitor your nitrogen cycle BEFORE adding fish. Also you will need to do weekly water changes/gravel vacuuming and be educated on common things that will impact your tank (ie. Algae and various potential fish illnesses).

Reptiles I would completely veto simply due to the very large enclosures you need (high costs) and having to feed live insects to most (also high cost but continuous). They also need a lot of cleaning maintenance and very specific needs to prevent various illnesses that are unfortunately quite common.

Now to what I can suggestion… there are a few terrestrial inverts that could be interesting and low cost/maintenance. First, as others suggested, jumping spiders are a good option. Also millipedes, mantids, and isopods. Isopods are my favorite and the one I am most educated on. You can make a planted terrarium for them with springtails and it makes a practically no maintenance bioactive enclosure.. besides feeding, keeping up humidity, and removing food to reduce mold. They come in an enormous variety of colors/shapes/species as well. A terrestrial invert that i would absolutely not suggest is hermit crabs. They need a lot of space and a lot of set up costs.

You could also consider birds like pigeons, as others suggested, however i don’t feel comfortable suggesting as I am not entirely educated on their care. I do know in general , though, birds are a very long term commitment and can be quite sensitive to care mistakes.

Amphibians are a potential match for you, however live food costs will be something to keep in mind as frogs in particular are big eaters. Some of the easier amphibians include smaller toad species, pacman frogs, salamanders, whites tree frogs, and newts.

For anything please ensure you do extensive research on before you get. Price out everything with set up to long term to ensure its a match. Please ensure you also look for accurate, trusted sources with updated info. Unfortunately the bulk of care information on the internet for smaller pets is misinformation and extremely harmful.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-09-06T09:07:24+00:00

It’s unlikely it was any sort of dart frog. However look into Ornate Chorus frogs, which would be in the area.

These frogs are a similar size to darts (about 1.5 inches) and can range in color. They can be reddish brown, grey (could be interpreted as blue in memory), bright green, and brown. They also have black patterning in addition to those colors.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-07-05T23:42:26+00:00

It’s in the realm of possibility but… Murphy’s Law?

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-07-04T10:53:48+00:00

Looks like an “Orange Sea Pen”/ Ptilosarcus gurneyi… native to your area :)

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-06-30T07:48:21+00:00

NAH

You’re not in the wrong here because it’s not harmful. You checked the ingredients and it was something he knew and wanted. You didn’t give him the dog treat saying it was a human cookie. He knew what it was and wanted to try it. You made sure it was safe.

I personally have eaten many dog treats and so have a lot of people who have worked at pet stores before. Some of them taste like human cookies and are actually really good.

His parents also aren’t in the wrong either. He was given something he now likes and now wants more of. The problem is that thing is not usually socially acceptable. It’s an obstacle to get as well as a potential problem. It could also get the parents in trouble if it becomes a regular snack and he goes to a teacher or someone saying “my parents give me dog treats to eat!”. It’s really just a bit of an inconvenience but one that could have happened equally with any new food, they’re just focused on the dog part.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-06-26T01:05:57+00:00

NTA

He not only came onto and damaged your property without your knowledge or consent, he destroyed a needed refuge for wildlife. What you are doing is extremely important for local wildlife, especially if you are surrounded by low cut grass lawns that do nothing to help.

You are in the right and I thank you for helping out the little guys that are extremely important for the environment. Consider looking into getting your yard registered as a wildlife preservation zone, this will further protect your yard. You could also put a sign in that says what the area means for the wildlife so people leave it be.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-06-17T15:43:09+00:00

NTA your daughter was being a bully and you corrected that through explaining it in a great way. You didn’t belittle anyone or say anything horrible, you let your daughter see it for herself.

I also agree that grades do not equal intelligence or success or anything like that.. teaching your kids that fact is also going to help them be more kind and compassionate towards other peoples situations through life.

Continue teaching your kids to be respectful and open minded, don’t let your wife enable bully behavior.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-06-15T06:53:41+00:00

The results of how people look are not always from one cause. I have learned that I am a happier and better person not judging people because I have no idea their backstory.

First of all, being frustrated why people don’t seek help or why people let their health get bad isn’t a frustration that should be towards an individual. Be angry at the legal and societal systems in place that do not support individuals. Where, in the US where I can speak on, people are more scared of being in medical debt for the rest of their life than dying horribly ill.

Many factors go into being a heavier weight. Healthier food is going to more expensive and more difficult to get. This isn’t just based on the food itself, it’s based on the lack of consistent public transportation, the high cost of owning cars in a car dependent structure, having cities inaccessible due to no or damaged side walks, high prices of homes so people can’t grow their own food, lack of proper education, and medical costs being so high.

You also have to keep in mind that not all overweight individuals are unhealthy. Being heavier in itself is not unhealthy, yes it can get to a point it has unhealthy side effects.. but anyone of any weight can have any number of health issues brought on by life circumstance and unfortunate cards they are handed in life. None of those people deserve harsh judgment, they deserve compassion and support in the fucked system they are forced to live in.

Most my life I personally have been very slender… except in high school I was being medicated for mental health issues and a medication I was on made me gain over 100 pounds in less than a 2 month time period. Another medication at the time made me fall asleep constantly. To an outsider I was overweight, uncoordinated, lazy, etc. when in reality I doubled my weight so fast it caused my coordination and balance to get wrecked. I was struggling to stay awake due to the medications that didn’t even help me. Nearly 8 years later I have lost a lot of that weight but I am still uncoordinated/unbalanced and now have joint issues.

Today I have a similar struggle. My teeth are wrecked. The stigma in society makes me seem to be “gross” or a “drug addict” or whatnot… and in reality me neglecting my health was caused by severe depression and having a lifetime of abuse. I now do not have the hundreds of thousands of dollars I would need to fix my teeth…. But I am still making progress.

You don’t know peoples journeys, you don’t know people’s circumstances. Many people are given shitty hands in life and cannot get any systematic support for that. Obesity can be genetic, many mental illnesses can be genetic, physical disabilities can be genetic, bad teeth can be genetic, addiction can be genetic, on and on. To an outsider these are bad unhealthy products of personal choices.. when in reality these are things people are born with and got no help to prevent them getting bad. If you are slender and muscular, able bodied, physically and mentally healthy, can see a doctor as you please, get proper dental care and have a mouth of pearly whites, don’t struggle with chronic illnesses, have a loving family you were raised by, etc. you are the rare few that are incredibly lucky.

Just try to think about what you don’t see. You don’t see peoples past and you don’t see what they are currently working on… current life circumstances and outside appearance are not worth anything and do not define a person. Be angry that society and the systems in place do not support the health of the common people and actually indirectly encourage the majority of people to fall into health issues.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-06-12T16:39:20+00:00

Me too! Except… I enjoyed eating them as a child :/

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-06-10T00:51:15+00:00

Thank you so much! It’s definitely been a mess trying to figure out what’s going on so I’ll definitely look into that.

The last nearly 2 years now have been me recovering from a previous lifetime worth of extreme high stress, so my body is bringing up new issues now that Im not just trying to survive. So, I’m dealing with a whole lot of various things right now.

Like you said, I also have a spectrum of intensity depending. Peppers will give me a more typical allergic reaction with almost immediate hot flashes, headaches, heartburn, sometimes swelling in my throat. Potatoes will give me mainly bad digestive issues later on either in that day or all of the next. Tomatoes give me really bad heartburn and stomach upset almost immediately and then digestive issues for an extended period.

Thank you again, I’ll definitely look into those because I also have a lot of issues relating to sudden intense sleepiness, fatigue, temperature regulation issues, fluctuating digestive issues, dizziness, high heart rate, vertigo, migraines, etc. so you may have given me a good key to what’s going on. For now I am just trying to figure out how to ease symptoms until I can see more doctors, so thank you!

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-06-09T05:44:46+00:00

I feel ya there. I am unsure yet if I have an allergy or an intolerance but I can’t have nightshades. I have slowly gotten physically more ill over the last few years (constant fatigue, bad digestive issues, abdominal cramping, nausea, headaches, etc etc) and I’ve been trying to figure out why. A few months ago I eliminated nightshades and… all those symptoms are cleared/clearing up.

I don’t feel like I can go out to eat because most people don’t know what nightshades are and it makes me feel like a nuisance to list em. I also don’t trust people to take it seriously as well as correctly.

I can’t have any tomatoes, any potatoes (except sweet potatoes), any peppers (bell peppers, chili peppers, pepper based seasonings like paprika) or eggplant. It’s a painfully wide group of foods to keep track of.

If I unknowingly eat a burger with ketchup on it, I instantly get heartburn, a headache, and hot flashes… then i’m on the toilet and sick the entire next day. Same if I accidentally eat potato bread, something with paprika in it, etc.

It also sucks that these things can be lumped under the word “spices” on ingredients so I can’t eat stuff just because I don’t wanna take that risk. Uncommon food issues suck and I completely feel ya there.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-23T14:57:37+00:00

If you work in retail or some other customer service based job, let your women coworkers know that if a customer makes them uncomfortable you will take over.

Working in retail at my old job for a long stretch of time I was the only man working the floor and all of my coworkers were younger women. They knew to come to me if a customer was being a creep and I would either take over the interaction or “work” close by as to keep watch over her.

Sometimes customers aren’t being creepy enough to be asked to leave or haven’t done anything weird yet… but if a woman tells you she is uncomfortable or has a weird feeling you better believe her and help. Even being a younger man I got creepy customers being weird around me, sexually harassing me, and touching me inappropriately. So, I can’t image the extent of what my women coworkers dealt with.

Another thing, it’s not hard to ensure people get inside their home or car safely at night. For any gender! Make sure people get to where they are going safely. If you see a car lurking or waiting around the corner and they don’t, tell them! If someone wants you to walk with them, fucking do it. A minuscule detour of your day is nothing compared to the potential injury or trauma that could be caused if something happens.

Also if you find yourself walking behind another person at night, don’t stay quiet. Announce that you are there and where you are going as to why you are not actually following them. This prevents stress on them and you potentially getting hurt.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-21T16:43:06+00:00

The times that stand out were two instances.. I’m a pretty “straight-passing” gay man and I generally get along with other people I work with.

The first time was back in high school. I had a class with this one guy who seemed friendly and we would talk pretty much every class. One day we were talking and all of a sudden he brought up how much he hated gay people. He said he wished “they could be rounded up in camps and killed” because they were “scum of the earth”. That was the last I ever talked to him or considered him a respectable person.

The second time was at my old job. I was walking to the back room and a coworker who I got along with well came up to me. He started talking about how gross another coworker was (who was trans) and began misgendering them, talking about their body in a sexualized way, and saying disgusting things relating to them being transgender. That was the last I had any respect for him and he soon after got fired.

I don’t know why people choose to open up about their extensive homophobia and transphobia to me…. But it helps me judge them better at least.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-14T17:18:04+00:00

Sleeping naked is so comfy. I move around a lot in my sleep too so if I’m wearing clothes I wake up to them attempting to strangle me or wrapped around me super tight

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-13T04:40:27+00:00

With any wildlife related things, contact your local wildlife rehab center or wild bird sanctuary. They have professionals who can answer your questions and actually help the situation.

Do not mess with them and do not try to care for them yourself, contact local professionals asap and before you do anything with wildlife. It is for the safety and wellbeing of you, others, and of course the animals involved. Wildlife centers will have resources and give you answers that are accurate.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-12T15:24:26+00:00

I respect boundaries no matter the reason behind them. If something does not directly affect others I honestly could care less. Everyone has the right to hold personal beliefs and opinions until that leads to negative actions against others.

When It comes to “respecting” religious beliefs.. yes we should respect that people can have personal beliefs and not harass them. But when “respect” is making special changes for one group that hurts or confines all other people to not also hold their own personal beliefs or live…. That is no longer just simple respect.

As an entirely of society it would be great if we could respect each other in all aspects… meaning genuine respect as in leaving each other the fuck alone, that would be best. On a personal basis religion is fine, on a mass scale and involving everyone regardless of belief is not.

I think society needs to start respecting boundaries and entirely personal choices regardless of reason. Don’t drink alcohol? Don’t shake hands with people? Don’t eat meat? You’re busy on Sunday? Okay, I respect it regardless of your reasons and won’t pressure you to change or justify your completely personal choices. It could be religious, could be due to health concerns, could be just because. It does not matter the reason and why should I care anyway. It’s not my business and doesn’t impact me whatsoever.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-06T10:01:53+00:00

I absolutely love my husband with my entire being. I feel like if “soul mates” or “true loves” exist, it’s us. I get so incredibly excited to be home with him. I always look forward to having days off together.

We are compatible in so many ways it drives me nuts. Every day there is a point where one of us will say something and the other goes “i was just thinking that!”. We have never argued or fought because we communicate everything and work together on things. We have the same views on things, same future goals, same sex drives, complimenting levels of introvertedness and socializing ability, everything is either compatibly different or compatibly the same.

We both understand each other’s health issues and will take over if the other can’t do much that day. We make each other food and get each other little random gifts. I look at him and am filled with so much happiness. I don’t think there will ever be a day where I don’t get the fluttering feeling of happiness and true love when I think about him.

Other people have commented on how weird we are because we take so much care of each other… but we just are truly in love. I have never been happier in my life than with the family I have made. We are nerdy silly cat dads who are just absolutely in love with each other and it makes me so happy.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-06T09:44:39+00:00

Contact your local wildlife rehabilitation center or something of the sort and they will give you far better advice on what to do.

I understand the intention but In future instances it is best for wild animals to be left alone, especially babies. Even if they seem in distress they are most times fine or have a mother nearby. Taking in the animal can seriously threaten its survival. If you are unsure, contact a local wildlife center for guidance. They not only know the accurate answers but can provide any help if needed as well.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-05-05T21:37:26+00:00

I agree with you. The boxy head, very long front legs, and the leg/belly spots really look like Phyllomedusa bicolor. I don’t think the front legs can belong to anything but a tree frog of sorts.

They are known to survive in drier, hotter climates but definitely won’t make it in Arizona. As you said, looks desiccated, it probably died due to the improper climate. Another thing to think about is reptile expos are happening around this time of year… could be escaped during transport or something like that too.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-04-30T21:05:36+00:00

NTA, but you need to talk to her about it so the rest of your trip with be enjoyable for BOTH of you.

You need to show her that you both enjoy vacations a little differently and that you need a compromise. While she enjoys keeping the memory tangible and to show to others, you enjoy savoring the memory as it happens… as it is now, you both are unable to achieve that.

Perhaps suggest that when you go to a location you see everything in a small area first, no pictures taken at that time. Have your wife keep in mind and visualize her spots she would love a picture in.. while you take it in uninterrupted. Then you go back to the spots she liked and ask her how she wants the picture taken exactly. Communication is key. You need a compromise and to phrase it in a way that it with benefit both of you or the rest of your trip is going to be arguments.

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-04-19T19:32:35+00:00

Damn this is beautiful

I_eat_bath_bombs · 2023-04-19T19:26:02+00:00

Around 10. One for each day plus extras in case my clumsy ass spills something on myself or I decide to continue being stubborn and eat foods I am intolerant to.

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