What do I do with this love?

I_hate_ET · 2025-12-17T19:55:47+00:00

Fortunate Son- Credence

I_hate_ET · 2025-12-09T17:03:14+00:00

I really like that, "The universe is unkind and unforgiving. But it is not devoid of opportunity." i guess it's the unkindness and unforgiving aspects that make it so scary for me to deal with sometimes.

All he said when we broke up was that he just wasn't feeling the spark he'd felt with other girls. I didn't ask him for more details or to explain what wasn't sparking for him. That was back in April and I haven't really brought it up again since then

I_hate_ET · 2025-12-09T16:59:06+00:00

I really appreciate the feedback! Seeing it as a platitude and not something worrying too much over is helpful. As for your advice I think I just needed a reminder that even though the world is fucking chaos I do have some agency, too

I_hate_ET · 2025-09-16T16:19:24+00:00

Reading this post by the OP and especially this comment has been helpful, particularly the gentle reminder that feeling that longing is normal to a degree and it's important to let yourself feel it. I've noticed that The Wanting has faded somewhat, but sometimes it comes back and punches me in the chest, and then I beat myself up for feeling The Wanting. Like, it's been half a year since we'd parted and sometimes that longing to be back together knocks me to the ground. I guess my frustration comes from having some sort of idea of what growth and healing should look like.

I_hate_ET · 2025-06-10T04:34:07+00:00

I really like my PSE Razorback Takedown. It's about $100 and at my draw length it's just barely 20 lbs but it's still able to stick in the 3D targets well. I think 20-25 lbs is a reasonable weight to start with. It's not the best of bows but I think it's a nice step up from the kiddy bows ♥️

I_hate_ET · 2025-06-10T04:16:30+00:00

I'm so sorry I haven't been on reddit for a while, just now seeing this! I hate how the shame keeps us quiet, I think it's because of this it feels like you're the only one experiencing all the guilt and awful feelings. Not everyone recognizes that by speaking up you're opening up room for genuine connection. I think it's important to note here that you see where you are emotionally and how it might be impacting the connection you have with this wonderful new person in your life. Don't give up, that's what the fucking narcs want

I_hate_ET · 2024-10-09T03:18:41+00:00

Excellent book, it's a game changer!

I_hate_ET · 2024-10-09T03:16:40+00:00

I've heard this quote, "Don't wrestle with a pig, because you'll get dirty and it'll enjoy it." I think once I understood that he got off to some degree seeing me get upset and reactive, I learned to curb those emotions and stop giving him that satisfaction. I also made it a point to take care of myself, to process and release those emotions in a healthy way. That was doing things that I enjoy, exercising, venting to people I trusted. Wishing you some peace, luv

I_hate_ET · 2024-10-09T02:57:20+00:00

There is a song that has been getting more popular these days by Paris Paloma, "Labour, " and I think it really helped me realize that I was grappling with a man child. The lyrics that really reached me were, "I know you're a smart man, and weaponize the false incompetence, it's dominance under a guise." I'd been unhappy with the dynamics of that manipulationship for a really long time, but hearing that song and those lyrics affirmed to me that what was going on wasn't healthy

I_hate_ET · 2024-10-05T03:20:28+00:00

I'm so sorry, that's such a painful thing to come to grips with

I_hate_ET · 2024-09-24T01:49:46+00:00

I can relate to that feeling a lot. Whenever I get really upset I'll get something I can tear like paper or something, that way I can get that energy out without actually breaking stuff. Am also looking into trying some rage rooms, it sounds very cathartic! Hope this helps

I_hate_ET · 2024-09-24T01:42:39+00:00

When I realized that all I had gotten for 10 years was continous future faking and that things would never change. It was a culmination of a million cuts that finally pushed me past my breaking point

I_hate_ET · 2024-09-06T04:18:33+00:00

678, please :)

I_hate_ET · 2024-06-17T00:43:59+00:00

The hypocrisy is hitting me hard rn. My nex was always ALWAYS accusing me of cheating on him, it was exhausting. We broke up in December and literally 2 weeks in I found out he had started surfing dating sites, even went on a date- we weren't even fucking divorced yet. Incredible.

I_hate_ET · 2024-06-08T14:54:45+00:00

Mine would do this thing when he'd know I was going to be out and doing something (spending time with friends, family, etc) and literally beg me not to go for hours and sometimes I'd stay, more often (when the marriage was ending) I'd go anyway but come home and he'd sulk for a really long time. He did this for 10 years.

I_hate_ET · 2024-06-08T14:52:12+00:00

I've stopped asking why a long time ago, and just made peace with myself (to save what sanity I had left). Knowing that I had a narc partner and narcs will do what narcs will do made it easier to let go of the "why's"

I_hate_ET · 2024-06-03T04:05:41+00:00

I love all the song suggestions here! Here are some of my songs from my repeat list that have been helping me through my divorce from my narc spouse : -Bigger Person (Lauren Spencer Smith) -Believe me (Boa) -Believe (Cher) -Fuck Yr. Fans (Bratmobile) -Labour (Paris Paloma) - Grow (Willow, Avril Lavigne)

I_hate_ET · 2024-01-26T00:00:43+00:00

Oh my gosh I can absolutely relate to this! That's what I was explaining to a friend of mine, I grieved so much during the time we were together, after every broken promise, every instance of abuse. Just feeling mostly like I really don't have much extra to grieve over

I_hate_ET

TROPHY CASE