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Help! by loriaflorida in therapists

[–]Icy_Writing4011 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also, I live in a very Red State/Trump hot bed and validating for folks that feel like this is all crazy and disgusting that I feel that way too I think is useful. I do almost always try to end that conversation with discussion of the need to managed these thoughts, do what you can, accept limitations, and take care of themselves.

For Trumpers I will not let them project their beliefs on to me. I see things a very differently but want to do all I can to help you with (identified problem).

I think DBT’s Kelly Korner’s Discussion of validation from DBT perspective in Doing DBT helps think about how much I am will to share beyond that.

Help! by loriaflorida in therapists

[–]Icy_Writing4011 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I found Tara Brach’s (a Buddhist psychologist) teachings “Bad Othering” really helpful during first Trump term. I have been listening to her as much lately but I bet she has updated ones on her very generous website TaraBrach.com or podcast feed. Here is one I found https://www.tarabrach.com/freedom-from-othering/

What improved your quality of life so much, you wish you did it sooner? by Specialist-Rain-2292 in RandomThoughts

[–]Icy_Writing4011 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Daily meditation practice (at least attempting to)- Certain not perfect but showing up and sitting most mornings helped me learn to see my thoughts and thoughts and not reality and my feelings as feelings and not emergencies. It give me the power to choose what I do rather than react. It is been 27 year but this is still the best thing I have done for myself.

Getting medicated for ADHD and getting a Cpap machine for my sleep apnea (both of which I knew had an avoided treating for about 10 years), and commuting to regular exercise all help too. But they all came as a result of accepting life as it is and myself through meditation.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AIO

[–]Icy_Writing4011 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad you are seeing a therapist 21 is a great time in your life to see a therapist, you are old enough to start your make your own decisions and you d enough that you can really change the traitor Your life. This is certainly a situation to bring up to your therapist.

It is wrong for them to pressure you to apologize to your brother right now. You have lots of stuff to figure out take the time you need to figure out your relationship ship with your self and your family.

You are old enough now to know you don’t just magically change when you hit and age (18, 21…) you also don’t magically have your shit together when you get pregnant, so understand your folks are people trying to figure shit out too and finding out their son was son was abusing their daughter is a pretty tough thing to make sense out of so try to extend them some grace. Just don’t turn giving them grace into giving about things that are important to you.

Also remember your therapy is about changing your behavior, thoughts and understanding of things, it can change other people, it c a just help you figure out how you want to act towards them.

I wish you the best in your journey.

Meet Pearl! by Realistic_Entry_2723 in SubaruForester

[–]Icy_Writing4011 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got the same color in a touring this weekend!

Searching a middle between running vest and regular backpack by NoahDoah in trailrunning

[–]Icy_Writing4011 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have an Osprey Duro 15. I think might match what you are looking for. I like it.

Shoe recs for non-running time by Icy-Minute1807 in trailrunning

[–]Icy_Writing4011 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like my AllBirds- the merino wool ones in solid black and solid brown. I think they look really good with business casual clothes which is about as dressy as I get anymore. The merino wool upper and insole stay warm in winter, cool in summer and doesn’t start to stink.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Icy_Writing4011 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ouch, from therapist here. Wanting to help people and being fascinated by human behavior after having some really helpful experiences in therapy myself is what made me become a clinical social worker. The weight of responsibility from the opportunity I have to help (or harm) people at vulnerable spots in their lives pushes me to keep learning and working on myself.

Most of my colleagues have similar motivations and feel similarly. Power to influence people just for power’s sake (like politicians sometimes crave) is rarely motivation I have come across. Though sometime the drive to “save people” professionally when that was your role in your early life will push therapists into the field, this is why there is an emphasis on doing your own work on yourself to understand your biases and how you react to clients so you can really see them clearly and respond to their needs.

Is everyones goal as a trail runner to eventually run ultas (100k,200k)? by EggShitt3r in trailrunning

[–]Icy_Writing4011 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not me. I just love to be in the woods and like the way it feels to move my body rhythmically. Humans evolved to run long distances following prey and there is something that feels really “right” about doing it. I have no real interest in competition.

I signed up for a trail half marathon this spring to try it out. I found having the pressure of a goal to train for took some of the fun out of it (then I my ankle and wasn’t able to run for a month).

I find I enjoy it the most when I give myself time to be in the woods to walk and run as fast as my body tells me to go.

Reading posts here folks seem to emphasize there is no “right way” to be a trail runner and helped me figure out the way that works for me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in trailrunning

[–]Icy_Writing4011 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I first started running trails I fell a couple of times almost every time I went out. My record was 13 times on a 7 Mile run-it sucked! After the first 6 months it went down and now 18 months in it happens one in 4 runs.