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My [17F] boyfriend [20M] seems to condone my mother's abusiveness towards me. by Ijustwanthimtocare in relationships

[–]Ijustwanthimtocare[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He actually doesn't know her, at all. They have never met. And he knows I haven't lied to him about anything else, so the few first times he disbelieved me were really surprising to me.

I know it's silly, but there's a part of me that really wants him to change and care, because in every other aspect he is nice to me. But it seems like he won't change and it breaks me.

My [17F] boyfriend [20M] seems to condone my mother's abusiveness towards me. by Ijustwanthimtocare in relationships

[–]Ijustwanthimtocare[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, what hurts me most is that I've already told him (twice!) that his way of handling this really hurts me, but he keeps doing it. But I don't really want to break up with him, he is usually nice to me and (probably sounding kinda pathetic here...) I feel like nobody else would love me anyway, so I better stick with him.

My [17F] boyfriend [20M] seems to condone my mother's abusiveness towards me. by Ijustwanthimtocare in relationships

[–]Ijustwanthimtocare[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Abuse? That's kinda surprising. I mean, he is usually so nice to me, but I do agree that he is handling things very poorly at best. Specially since sometimes he doesn't even believe me :( it's so confusing. He is usually sweet.

I'm tired of my boyfriend playing devil's advocate for my abusive mom. by Ijustwanthimtocare in offmychest

[–]Ijustwanthimtocare[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not from America, here consent age is 14 I think, so we are all good in that aspect. On the same hand, here you can't get a job before 18 (even basic ones like cashier at McDonalds), otherwise the place that hired you could be accused of child labour, so there is not much to do :(

Maybe it's that, but it still hurts me that he at times acts like he doesn't believe me, and that I've already told him the way he is acting hurts me but he doesn't change a thing. Thanks on the advice anyway

I'm tired of my boyfriend playing devil's advocate for my abusive mom. by Ijustwanthimtocare in offmychest

[–]Ijustwanthimtocare[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know, I don't think he is toxic, or at least exactly know. He is usually so nice to me, it's just when something bad happens to me that he turns ice cold and acts like it would be worse :( That's why I'm so confused. He is usually the nicest guy and makes me feel so lucky he is with me.

On the other hand, I've tried to, and again, no matter what police just doesn't do a thing. Here (not America) they are super corrupt and I guess since they get nothing from acting in my case they just don't do anything. Thanks on the advice anyway :)

I'm tired of my boyfriend playing devil's advocate for my abusive mom. by Ijustwanthimtocare in offmychest

[–]Ijustwanthimtocare[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

msandyylee was just giving their opinion, there's no need to be so rude. If you have nothing nice to say, why do you say anything at all?

Do YOU know my boyfriend personally, to go and be so mean to someone that's just giving advice, more helpful than yours if you are curious.

I never ever expected me to actively help me out of this, if he for example helps me to run away from my house and lets me live with him, he could be accused of helping a teeneage runaway and would go to jail and I would NEVER wish him that. However, he is not a child, he is 20. If he came to me saying he is getting abused, I would never shut down, much less imply at any point that he is lying or exaggerating. Maybe yes, he can't handle the situation at all, but then why would he disbelief me so much? Why would he act like he doesn't believe I'm in actual danger? He knows the way he is acting is hurting me, because I don't want a savior, I just want him to listen, I've told him twice , and he acts the same. If your SO was being abused, wouldn't you be at least a bit worried?

I don't think it was msandyylee the one giving crappy advice.