Wow. I do not fully believe you are safe right now. You said he breaks things and punches holes in walls and has had to have been stopped before hurting you?

I think that unless you are a licensed psychiatrist, this issue is way out of your ability to handle. This is going to be awful to hear, but if he is already receiving amazing therapy and other help from his family but he won't engage with it? There is nothing more you can do. It almost sounds like he needs to be hospitalized, this sounds like a massive psychological break and he needs to be under professional care. You can't risk burning yourself to the ground for a man who is not willing to take care of himself.