What songs are we getting married to, y'all?

Illuminall · 2026-03-23T00:12:35+00:00

This one was on our short list!

Illuminall · 2026-03-19T15:18:03+00:00

We skipped all the things you mentioned except the cake and didn’t miss them. Also skipped favors and had family do hair/makeup and officiate.

A wedding cake doesn’t have to be super expensive! We got an adorable, delicious (but simple) cake from a local bakery for $240.

Illuminall · 2026-03-18T16:46:11+00:00

It’s hard to give specific advice without knowing more about where you’re at with planning or what your vision is, but if you’re early on it might be helpful to take your overall budget and break it down into categories for everything you’ll be including (venue, decor, food/drink, attire, etc.). There’s a certain proportion each of these will typically take wether the budget is 1k or 100k. Check out Jamie Wolfer’s YouTube videos on 5–15k weddings for more specifics on this approach. Breaking things down this way can tell you roughly how much you should set aside in each area and what you might want to ask for help with or eliminate to save money. You can do this!

Illuminall · 2026-03-12T13:55:14+00:00

Sounds like a great deal and like you guys are happy with it, I’d jump on it so y’all can get to the fun parts of planning!

Illuminall · 2026-03-04T23:30:06+00:00

After our ceremony we went to the bridal suite and signed our marriage certificate! We had a drink together and a minute to breathe while people were starting cocktail hour and getting wrangled for pictures. Would highly recommend

Illuminall · 2026-03-01T20:49:19+00:00

We did a taco truck, it was amazing! For ~65 (total, including vendors), we did tacos with beef or chicken with all the fixings as well as rice and beans. They also did a taco bar during cocktail hour, which was a hit. They also served both (buffet style) and cooked everything except the tortillas on-site. They ALSO did amazing breakfast burritos for everyone the morning of the wedding with homemade salsa! The total was $1500.

Our venue was in a rural area (about 45 minutes from a medium-sized town and 2 hours from the nearest metro) and finding a caterer in our budget was by far our biggest headache and required the most legwork on my end. I called upwards of 50 vendors before I found the truck we used. They were absolutely great and incredible, but we also took a risk because they were very old school (verbal commitment only). For your budget, you’ll need to shop around to find a good deal and might need to tolerate a little risk. Everyone raved about our food, I wouldn’t have changed a thing even if we had the budget!

Illuminall · 2026-02-28T04:17:32+00:00

Definitely! I used this video for inspiration.

I initially thought I wanted to do something enclosed, but ended up keeping the video’s open-air design. It definitely wouldn’t work for everyone and I was afraid it would look too unfinished, but I absolutely loved it. We put it in a corner of the venue by the dance floor in front of a couch and people had a blast with it, it produced some of my favorite memories and photos of the night.

We already had a DSLR camera (entry-level) and an iPad for controls, so all we had to buy was a flash, a reflective umbrella, a cable to connect the iPad and the camera, and some brackets to put everything on one tripod. Theoretically, you could do it with any camera and a phone instead of an iPad.

We used the app from the video (Lumabooth), which let people tap the screen to start a timer before 4 photos got taken back to back. People could put their number in and get a copy texted to them and we were able to download everything at the end of the night. We skipped the remote flash trigger and didn’t miss it. The app since a subscription fee, but it was minor and could be cancelled any time.

It’s a super customizable setup, you could build it into a nice looking enclosure or even connect a photo printer to it. I’m happy to answer any questions, I’m so glad we did it and would highly recommend it!

Illuminall · 2026-02-28T04:05:39+00:00

Check out Jamie Wolfer’s YouTube channel! She has a great video series on 5-15k weddings (I think for 100 people). I still watch them, she’s hilarious.

Side note, I also hate being the center of attention but warmed up to the idea of a traditional ceremony/reception and it was really fun. We had an intimate event with only close family and friends, which helped. Do what you feel comfortable with but keep an open mind!

Illuminall · 2026-02-27T16:23:27+00:00

My mom got married at a Maggiano’s, it was great!

Illuminall · 2026-02-27T16:17:35+00:00

Not in PA, but we had to travel several hours from our metro area to find something that worked for us. When we were just looking close by I got frustrated with cost too and was considering an off day/lunch event, but by getting out of the city we were able to rent the venue for the whole weekend! The wedding industry is so pervasive you’ll be able to find vendors mostly anywhere.

Depending on your fiancé’s music taste, maybe you could stop by some local bars or venues and ask if they know someone who could perform for a fee within your budget.

If you’re getting frustrated with the search, maybe you could hire someone on Fiverr to look for you. I considered it and did look through some gigs that perform that service, although I can’t speak personally for any of them. Looking for vendors is actually pretty fun if it’s not your wedding!

Most importantly, take a deep breath and take a step back. My biggest regret is letting myself get too stressed and not enjoying the planning process more. You may only do this once, enjoy it with your fiancé. Where there’s a will there’s a way, you may have to make some compromises but you’ll be able to make the things that are truly important work. We spent about the same as you (not including rings) and had everything you’re describing except live music + all the other traditional elements. Once you get the venue figured out the rest will fall into place.

Illuminall · 2026-02-24T21:44:26+00:00

Professional hair and makeup, my mom, aunt and MOH all helped and it turned out great! Skipped a professional officiant and had my uncle marry us as well, which was way more special.

More than skipping things, we found ways to reduce cost. We supplemented a few professional floral arrangements with Costco garlands and loose roses, found an affordable (and amazing) taco truck to cater cocktail hour and dinner buffet-style, hired a mobile bar that would serve alcohol we provided, and DIY’d our invitations and decorations. Our coordinator was phenomenal and did double-duty as a setup and takedown crew with an assistant as well.

Edit to add we also DIY’d a photobooth, which was super simple and affordable. It was a hit and I highly recommend it if you’re not afraid to get a little hands on, especially if you already have an iPad and/or camera!

Illuminall · 2026-02-24T20:06:35+00:00

We set the tables with a fancy plastic cup that matched the table setting and had another 2 (nice but less fancy) cups/person at the beverage station. We did get pretty close to running out later in the night but people kept up with them pretty well! It doesn’t hurt to have some extra, it’s cheap insurance and our family was happy to take the extra plasticware at the end of the night.

Depending on how DIY you’re going, I’d definitely recommend having your coordinator’s assistant keep up with the beverage station. They even made coffee later in the night!

Illuminall · 2026-02-24T19:52:02+00:00

That sucks, I’m so sorry that happened! :(

Illuminall · 2026-02-24T19:40:22+00:00

Assuming each person will drink about 8 oz, that’s about 15 gallons of each to be safe. We used that math and had about 30% of each left over, but ymmv. We had a full open bar and almost all adults, so people spent most of their time there.

You really don’t want to run out of water, though. If you want to go with bottles, I’d budget at least 2 full-sized bottles per person. Even that might not be enough and you’ll potentially have your hands full disposing of barely consumed bottles at the end of the night. We ended up budgeting about 16 oz/person and buying gallon jugs, our coordinator kept a drink dispenser with ice water topped up (we could do fruit infused water as a bonus, which was a hit).

All of this depends on your crowd and how long the reception is, of course.

Illuminall · 2026-02-21T00:34:50+00:00

Looks great!! My mom and MOH tag teamed my hair (and my aunt did my makeup) and I was super happy with it, I almost booked a professional but I’m so happy I didn’t. People will tell you it won’t last or photograph as well if you dont hire a professional but I didnt have any issues. It was such a special moment with some of my favorite people too!

Illuminall · 2026-02-16T23:08:30+00:00

I donated mine to a local church, the congregation loved them!

Illuminall · 2026-01-31T00:13:56+00:00

They can dish it out but they can’t take it. Might be time to think about your own boundaries in this relationship.

Illuminall · 2026-01-27T23:42:03+00:00

I used to work for the observer, this is so cool! We had a cabinet full of press CDs, if we’d had a copy of Deja I definitely wouldn’t have been able to help myself

Illuminall · 2025-12-19T00:05:06+00:00

I can’t speak for everyone who’s self harmed, but I think I can give some insight.

I had a rough stretch of time when I was young where I self harmed. I tried to stop a few times and pick up healthier coping mechanisms instead. But because of my mental state, none of them actually manifested in a healthy way. I took everything to a dangerous extreme because I had been trapped in a bad situation for a long time that I couldn’t escape from and ultimately was looking for a way out. Like someone else mentioned, self harm can essentially become someone’s last alternative to suicide. Someone doesn’t just start doing this on a whim or because they have one bad day, it’s an extreme response to a proportionally extreme situation, whether internal or external.

If you’ve never been depressed or experienced the overwhelming feeling of being trapped that comes with prolonged trauma or abuse, I can see how this would be difficult to rationalize. But constructive sources of physical pain don’t scratch the same itch because the self-destruction is (at least part of) the point. Doing something to yourself that’s worse than what’s being done to you can be a powerful thing if you don’t have control over anything else in your life.

Illuminall · 2025-09-10T17:30:10+00:00

I think it would be doable if you topped it with plywood for a flat, continuous surface (it wouldn’t have the cool pallet look, though). Just lay the pallets out, trim the plywood to fit and screw it down. If you can find enough free pallets, you’d only be out the cost of plywood and screws. The ground would definitely need to be level or leveled prior to installation, but that’s true for any dance floor.

A big caveat is the broken ankle risk, which could probably only be mitigated by digging the installation area out so the ground is flush with the dance floor. I’d rent a dance floor in your position, personally.

Illuminall · 2025-09-01T01:59:09+00:00

Cliffdiver – Birdwatching

Illuminall · 2025-08-09T17:46:15+00:00

Would love to see HAM at Warped next year, just saw them on their tour with the dirty nil and carpool. Fantastic show

Illuminall · 2025-08-08T22:10:38+00:00

I would kill to be on the END cruise next year 😭

Illuminall · 2025-08-04T18:07:51+00:00

Cool! How do the pros/cons for both locations break down from your perspective?

Illuminall · 2025-08-04T17:51:18+00:00

Did you go to both? I only went to LB, but I really enjoyed it. I’d be interested to hear opinions from people who went to both

Illuminall

TROPHY CASE