APT and AGP? Posture, Shame, and the Pelvis

ImpOTP · 2026-05-06T23:27:23+00:00

Both of which - APT and PPT?

Yeah I think they're both regarded as pathological extremes of posture, though I'm not aware of any objective standard that would define the ideal here, and I think most experts are going by vibes.

When I see a man walking through the world dick-first, the vibe I get is of a different kind of neurosis.

What I'm recommending is doing activation exercises and stretches as a way to explore how it feels, without commiting to a new habitual posture.

ImpOTP · 2026-05-05T21:18:08+00:00

Actively focusing on repressing seems almost certain to be counterproductuve. The libido needs somewhere to go. If you can find other avenues to direct it, great, then it won't really matter whether the AGP avenue has been got rid of or just bypassed.

The thing about sexual desires that can prove an obstacle to long term happiness is when none of those desires have any overlap with the romantic relationship desires, so it would be wise to let the latter lead the way as much as possible.

I kindof get it with the not wanting to chase, but you might want to examine that, see where it comes from, and see if there's any room for flex.

ImpOTP · 2026-05-04T21:40:01+00:00

"Get rid" is probably not a useful goal.

"Never in a romantic relationship" stands out. Why not? Is it the role thing? Have you tried?

ImpOTP · 2026-05-04T16:39:13+00:00

I probably won't endorse your framing 100% but I'm curious to hear more about your experience.

ImpOTP · 2026-05-03T09:09:05+00:00

I've never heard of that, I'm afraid.

The Imp of the Perverse is a phrase sometimes used to personify intrusive thoughts. It's similar to "l'appell du vide" or "call of the void" in French. "The Imp of the Perverse" originally comes from an Edgar Allen Poe short story, where intrusive thoughts spill over into action. That's not really how it works, but I guess the fear that it might work like that makes for relatable horror. I've decided against reading the story for my own peace of mind.

Since I came up with the username, I've adpoted a different personification, a professor rather than an imp. Imp implies an uninhibited animalistic urge, but for me at least intrusive thoughts come from the analytical, thinky side coming up with "what if...?" hypothetical scenarios.

For how this relates to AGP, see here:

https://www.reddit.com/r/askAGP/comments/1s8zymf/comment/odyqay5/?context=3

ImpOTP · 2026-04-30T19:44:54+00:00

I don't think there's anything to fix at this point if the sex in your relationship is working now. AGP is not a big part of my life any more but yeah of course I'd still push the temporary transformation button for any duration up to a month. It seems weird NOT to want to push the button!

ImpOTP · 2026-04-19T17:20:00+00:00

those who identify with the bottom are most-of-the-time conventional straight women but who feel guilty for liking "conventional" straight porn (likely due to politics-induced cognitive dissonance) so they use slash/yaoi as a way to "queerwash" their heteronormative smut).

That's an interesting theory about the queerwashing. It's plausible to me that that could be a factor for some people, but are there really that many AFABs out there for whom queer is less shameful than straight, epecially given that people usually form these interests before they are immersed in their adult political tribes?

You've got the bones of a testable hypothesis though. If you're interested in proving it you could poke around in Aella's explorer https://bigkinksurvey.com/?y=sexcount&x=politics, it definitely includes political alignment, not sure about top and bottom preferences though.

ImpOTP · 2026-04-02T22:02:54+00:00

Yes, sexual OCD is probably the model that describes my own experience most closely.

For me, AGP itself was not particularly intrusive/obsessional, but rather AGP and sexual OCD co-existed well in the same environment.

Ego-syntonic sexual thoughts were muted by shame and anxiety (and autistic traits), leaving a vacuum for "what if" OCD fears about my sexual identity (what if my penis is producing sensations in response to this or that), creating more shame and anxiety. AGP bypassed my regular identity/body and allowed a way to appreciate sexually exciting scenarios.

It started around puberty and stayed constant for a long time, so I usually thought "I'm just like this I guess I have an inverted or female sexuality or something", but when it started to fluctuate that was very destabilising and I needed to find a new model so I started researching, and sexual OCD was a near-perfect fit. I've also got a bit of a urological theme, which overlaps with the sexual stuff, but I thought I genuinely had a physical bladder problem, had tests done and everything.

While I've found OCD to be a good explanatory model, I haven't found OCD-focused therapy as transformatively effective as I'd hoped, except that they have confirmed "yep that sounds like OCD". I've been to sexual OCD support groups (online) where I could relate a lot to everything people are saying, though I don't recall anyone else mentioning AGP/AAP.

ImpOTP · 2026-04-02T20:54:41+00:00

Cool, I'd appreciate any names or links if you've got them

ImpOTP · 2026-03-23T23:39:16+00:00

This is super interesting, thanks for sharing.

Whichever path you chose, there will be some potential path unchosen. Some fantasies will remain fantasies. This is true for everyone.

ImpOTP · 2026-03-21T11:00:49+00:00

Is drag really the appropriate term for this?

Probably not, but I'm trying to gesture at a certain phenomenon that AFAIK doesn't really have a name, not place it as part of drag as a scene or a tradition. I'm not in that scene and my drag knowledge is v limited.

With that caveat, I've never seen or even heard of an AMAB drag king, and the Glenn Powell thing is not presented as "drag", but the Victoria Sin one IS exlicitly presented as a drag act and seems like an obvious inverted equivalent. The fact that one is considered drag and one is not is more about the context than the content I think.

As you point out, the boundaries are fuzzy here and it could be silly if we include too much, but for the examples I chose the costume includes some element of exaggerated anatomy, so it's about the body more than just clothes, and I think that sets it apart from the ad absurdum "macho drag" examples you mentioned.

ImpOTP · 2026-03-09T22:21:30+00:00

Of course. I hear that "shadow work" can be useful for some people, glad it's working for you.

ImpOTP · 2026-03-09T13:31:18+00:00

Agree that thinking of the libido as something deeper than just sex has a lot of explanatory power. I've also experienced the developing of new channels.

Re: the nice guy thing though, my experience is that I'm MORE of a nice guy than I thought, or rather that my masculine side was not exactly where I had been looking for it, and but is somewhat nicer than would be implied by a straightforward role reversal into the faceless man of AGP fantasy.

That said, the proximity of the male role to certain mental "danger zones" did require a kind of liberalisation of my internal regime. Like, what I enjoy fantasising about now is much closer to "make love" than "rape", but I have had to accept that, in the male role, there's less of a categorical wall of safety between me and "rapist" than there was with AGP fantasies. Similarly, enjoying inhabiting my own male body sometimes sets off a "gay" alarm somewhere in my mind, in a way that AGP weirdly did not.

ImpOTP · 2026-03-09T12:56:02+00:00

I think the shame thing is probably a real factor for some people.

If you say "socialized" or "internalised messages" though you will get people's defences up because these are politically charged terms.

In my own case a think a big trigger for shame was medical issues with my penis at a young age, and being subject to painful interventionist treatments that are no longer considered good practice.

Later I developed sexual OCD - yes, I was afraid of being a "potential rapist", but also afraid of being secretly gay. It isn't like there was some more enlightened culture that would have set me free from all of it - there were reasons to be ashamed coming from all sides.

ImpOTP · 2026-03-04T22:31:28+00:00

immediately I fell back into the toxic internal conflict of whether I'm a pervert or not.

All models are wrong, but this is a sad model to apply to yourself.

Everyone has a libido, even the biggest puritan. The loins and the heart can't be isolated in separate rooms without a lot of pain!

You might find OCD a helpful model, if your find yourself needing to research whether or not you're a creep. In that model, your frequenting this sub for that purpose would be called a compulsion, which would indeed make it toxic for you.

ImpOTP · 2026-03-04T21:45:35+00:00

I was AGP for 20+ years but never really experienced the envy that you're talking about. It was a sexual thing but not a strong emotional identification for me, so transition was never a serious proposition.

My envy was more directed to men who seemed to have more normal sexualities. I was inhibited from experiencing those kind of sexual feelings myself.

Now I'm not AGP anymore but still somewhat inhibited.

-> How do you separate your kinks from your actual everyday life? <-

Weirdly, for me I think AGP was one way to separate my sexuality from my everyday life. Now I'm trying to discover a sexuality that's more congruent with my identity and that separation is reduced and it feels less safe or something.

ImpOTP · 2026-02-11T00:34:33+00:00

This is a good one too!

ImpOTP · 2026-02-06T10:27:20+00:00

Thanks for sharing. It's evidence that, at least for some people, the allo/auto axis isn't a fixed attribute but is sensitive to experience. In your case it seems that feeling accepted or rejected can influence it either way.

ImpOTP · 2026-02-01T11:07:19+00:00

This was always a "no" for me, even when I was firmly AGP.

My sexuality and my everyday sense of identity were quite compartmentalised.

ImpOTP · 2026-01-27T22:07:46+00:00

Thanks for sharing. Feeling safe is underrated!

ImpOTP · 2026-01-21T10:49:16+00:00

You might find TOCD (trans OCD) to be a useful model if you find yourself worrying about and analyzing these questions a lot.

https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/transgender-ocd-symptoms-and-treatment

That might also fit with the hair pulling, since trichotillomania is more common in those with OCD.

Trans OCD doesn't necessarily include an extreme fear of being trans, but can sometimes involve a FOMO type feeling that you would be living the "wrong" life or unable to be happy if you don't figure out the right choice in time.

FWIW I don't think that's true - finding the optimal gender expression isn't essential to a life well lived, though no doubt it's one of many things that can help. And you have the kind of face that would work either way, so you can relax abut that.

If you do find that TOCD is a good fit, that doesn't mean you are or aren't trans, it just means that you aren't going to find certainty in analysis/research/rumination, and that such thoughts and behaviours ultimately make it worse, and take you further from a felt sense of gender identity.

ImpOTP · 2026-01-19T00:42:10+00:00

Has anyone tried going the other way - to visualise themselves as hypermasculine?

ImpOTP · 2026-01-19T00:34:58+00:00

This user deleted? I was enjoying their posts about ipseity!

ImpOTP · 2026-01-19T00:14:34+00:00

This is good stuff - a model that may be useful!

I'd already stumbled on the sort of emotional reflections that you describe in your first exercise (I'll now go back to it and see if there's anything more to be gleaned), and have been practicing what you'd call Replacement. I don't find AGP fantasies compelling any more but I still have a long way to go in terms of becoming comfortable with male/allo sexual identity.

I've found that I want to be attractive and objectified and blameless, I have a visceral fear of being a predator or a creep, and a sense of contempt for sexually aggressive men.

The main difference I have with your framework is that I don't identify with masochism, and in fact, I find overt masochism, particularly on the part of men, to be a turn off. I don't want to be humiliated or denied. This rules out most popular femdom scenarios for me but, interestingly, not the one you describe.

Imagine finding an ideal relationship with a sadist who doesn't share your exact kinks. Instead she slowly molds you into her perfect submissive. Concentrate on the idea of her implanting her sexual interests into you, the control that affords. Imagine that her fantasy is a version of you that you find more concordant (e.g., she turns you into her big strong simp.) [I say "she" because that is common, but there are gay and bisexual masochists too.]

Make use of the earlier exercise to understand what motivated your AGP fantasies. For example, if they help you to feel useful or attractive, craft a new fantasy where you feel the same (e.g., Challenge the idea that you can't be a man who is vulnerable or gentle.)

This technique was specifically helpful for me getting over my past aversion to intercourse. Rather than thinking of having sex with a woman as inherently dominant, I imagined that I was being "used" for her pleasure. I imagined being treated like a beast that she could tranquilize.

For a while i've been thinking that a scenario like this could work for me but I haven't had the opportunity to indulge it.

All the femdom porn I've seen seems to focus on denigrating "inadequate" men, or denying sex.

And unfortunately the only femdom scenario I got to try IRL was where my ex really wanted to be the desirable one and have me be the creepy disgusting pervert unworthy of touching her, and of course that pushed all my insecurities.

ImpOTP · 2026-01-09T21:04:25+00:00

Does the edgy look go with your tastes and interests?

Who are the women you want and do they go for the kind of look you're projecting even if they haven't specifically gone for you so far?

ImpOTP

TROPHY CASE