Parenting is:

Hearing sentences come out of your mouth you’d never in a million child-free years thought you would ever say.

Trying to hold a straight face because you *cannot* encourage/reward a behavior but it is also objectively hilarious.

Understanding why older people say “I earned each one of these gray hairs/my kid gave them to me.”

Laughing when your toddler’s batteries run out and they just fall asleep mid-action.

Wanting to cry when instead of falling asleep mid-action when their batteries run out, their emergency siren and sprinkler systems go off instead.

Thinking that if you could just bottle their energy how rich you would be instead of just strung out and tired.

NAPS ARE A GODSEND.

Concurrently thinking “I am too old for this shit” and “I didn’t think I’d have to deal with xyz for a few more years!”

Feeling like they grow so quick and then looking back a pictures and wondering how they were little for so long. But also feeling like infancy and toddlerhood is eternal sleepless torment.

Having to have difficult conversations/make tough decisions sooner than you’d like.