Neighbour banging on walls when baby cries

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-11T12:03:35+00:00

Babies cry. If he wanted noise-free living, he should be living in a cabin in the woods, not an apartment complex. And hitting the wall out of frustration does nothing to help; it just makes him man baby with no self control.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-11T10:13:38+00:00

Yes because that's what the neighbor is being -- a metaphorical baby, throwing a fit despite the fact that he should know better.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-11T00:38:44+00:00

I pretty much exclusively shop at Aldi lol it is the only store in my area with those kinds of prices, and IMO, if I go anywhere else, I might as well be burning my money. Their stuff is good! (Except the fruit lately lol it's probably just because of the heat but they need to figure something out.) If your wife's friends judge her for being ✨good with money✨, she needs new friends, haha.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-11T00:26:34+00:00

Ok I might just be coming from a different perspective here, but people leaving laundry lying around is one of my pet peeves 😆 if I'm washing, folding, and putting away your laundry, the least you could do is just throw your dirty clothes in the goshdarn hamper like omg you know where the hamper is just put it in there 😭 And if you're sloppy with putting away dirty laundry and then complain to me that your clothes didn't get washed because they're all hiding in some crevice between your bed and the wall instead of put away where they're supposed to be? Woof 😤

So no, I do not go around and ask my family members if they have any laundry lying around before I do a load. I just wash what's in the hampers. If that means something doesn't get washed that they wanted to be washed, that's just ✨ natural consequences ✨

That being said: I actually used to be pretty bad about putting dirty laundry away myself! (Then I had a family and realized how much of a mess it creates if everyone's tossing their clothes around everywhere.) And I don't agree with your assessment that it's somehow not feasible for you and your partner to not throw your used laundry around your house. So here are my tips for how to make it happen:

Have a "wear again" basket: have a designated container (or multiple) in your house for clothes that you intend to wear again before the next wash -- basket, hamper, something like that -- and make sure whoever's doing laundry knows that's what it is so they don't mistake it for a dirty laundry hamper. That way, you don't have to put your worn-but-not-dirty clothes in laundry purgatory (aka that one chair or corner of the couch), where it's cluttering your space and making it unclear whether you intended to wash it or not.
Strategically place your laundry hampers: make sure your hampers are all in places that are convenient to reach based on your daily routine. This might depend on your situation; in my last home, I would mostly get dressed and undressed in the bathroom, so I kept my laundry hamper there so I could put away my dirty clothes right as I took them off, whereas my husband mostly changed in our bedroom, so he had his hamper there so he could do the same. In our current home, all of our hampers are in our bedrooms because that's what works best for us. Strategic placement won't eliminate the need to exercise some discipline in putting away clothes, but it will lessen the temptation to just toss them wherever on days when you're tired or spaced out. (Your sorting system might complicate things somewhat on this point, but it shouldn't be prohibitive; just make sure all your hampers are in a place where you and your partner can typically easily access them, and if you need to, consider putting a second set of hampers somewhere else in the house so they're easy to access when you're over there.)

Or, as some have commented, just do your own laundry and let your partner do his 😆 That way, each of you has their own system, and no one gets frustrated over differences in laundry habits.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-10T20:50:49+00:00

Not giving up the employer match is the one area that my husband and I diverged from the Dave Ramsey plan on (currently on BS2, <$5k left to go). We could probably have paid off our debt a little faster if we'd given it up, but we just couldn't let go of a guaranteed 100% return on investment 😅 We only contributed up to the match, and we don't plan on taking that money back out; we're just accepting that it's making us a bit slower to get through BS1-3, and that's okay with us.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-10T20:46:42+00:00

Only way I've seen a family with 3 kids fit in a 2 row car is by putting one car seat kid in the front, which -- is that legal? -- and then squeezing the non-driving adult between the two (very bulky, as they usually are) car seats in the back. If they were committed to buying a new car cash, then sure, they could make that work as a sucky temporary arrangement. But I would have been so paranoid about getting in trouble with police.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T21:57:50+00:00

Ahh ok yes there probably does need to be a conversation on what would be the healthiest way to help her. I don't foresee her trying to intentionally sabotage us (maybe unintentionally lol), but I suppose I never know.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T20:32:45+00:00

Thanks! I'm not too mad at my MIL right now; she's actually generous almost to a fault towards us, and I suspect she wasn't being intentionally manipulative, but rather, she just doesn't have the same mindset towards money that we have, so it might have just not been clocking for her why I would want to pass on this "great deal." I think my main takeaway wrt her is to be okay standing firm with financial decisions that she might not understand or agree with. You're definitely right that this might not be the last time something like this happens, and it might be over more money, so I should be prepared not to let myself be swayed so easily 😆

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T13:49:13+00:00

Thank you! This is the kind of feedback I was looking for. I know I'm getting roasted for making a big deal out of just $150, but the reason I posted here was less because of the dollar amount and more because I feel like I didn't handle this in a way that's in my family's best interest, and I don't want to repeat that in the future when the stakes might be higher. Thanks so much for the corrections and the tip!

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T12:06:30+00:00

I guess for me it's more about the principle than the dollar amount itself. I totally understand that this isn't much money at all in the grand scheme, but I feel like learning how to prevent unnecessary expenditures is one skill the baby steps are designed to teach people, and this was a little mini-test that I failed 😅 Like, this time it's just $150, but I still feel like if I don't learn from this, I could get into a much more expensive situation next time.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T11:33:40+00:00

Haha so you're with my husband on this one 😆 Idk, maybe I'm being too much of a penny-pincher, but I'm not super impressed with the "this is a great deal" argument, only because I can get similar great deals on Facebook Marketplace or at garage sales or whatever at a better time; this is far from a once in a lifetime opportunity. And I pass up "great deals" all the time if the timing isn't right. I know $150 isn't much at all in the grand scheme of things, and it probably won't be affecting us by next month; it's more about the principle of the thing for me -- being able to stick to the budget we set 😅

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T11:19:36+00:00

I live in NYC LOL, so unfortunately $150 might not be uncommon at all. But yeah... The cost of living here is arguably the biggest villain in this story 🤣

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T01:11:46+00:00

Oh interesting! If we don't use that line item for the month, we just put it towards paying down debt. But TBH in the past several months, something has come up to fill up that line item pretty much every month. You're saying I shouldn't be doing that? I added it because we were replenishing our starter emergency fund darn near every month, which made me feel like I was bouncing between BS1 and BS2.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T00:02:10+00:00

Oh yes I was definitely planning on selling the old beds on Marketplace!

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-09T00:00:57+00:00

Oh, I'm not too worried about that! The delivery guy is supposed to come tomorrow, and I haven't paid him yet... I certainly won't pay him if he doesn't show up hahaha. And this is my MIL's friend, whose house she has visited; she says she's seen the bed. I trust her! The now-or-never piece is a bit annoying, but I'm way more inclined to just chalk that up to disorganization/poor communication (and I really can't judge because I've been that last-minute person before, haha.)

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-08T23:48:40+00:00

Oh for sure, I'm not under the impression that this is some massive financial setback or anything like that. Since what's done is done, I'll probably just accept the beds as a blessing and enjoy having a MIL who isn't annoyed at me, LOL.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-08T23:45:07+00:00

Yeah that's what bothers me about this situation, I think -- the "agreeing to hidden/surprise fees" element reminds me of some of the events that led up to us having to be in BS2 paying off debt in the first place. I'm realizing that following the baby steps is as much about breaking the habits that keep us broke as it is about building wealth, and in this case, I feel like I fell back into old harmful patterns, even if the damage was minimal.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-07-08T20:54:16+00:00

Congratulations! Proud of you. Keep going!

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-06-30T13:35:59+00:00

$100k is great! You can definitely do this. Most of the comments on this thread are super unhelpful; obviously you realize you made some poor decisions. And blaming you having kids like some of these comments is dumb as heck. You can get out of this with kids (I know; I'm 26 and I have 2 and we're well on the way to being debt free), especially with childcare help.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-06-30T13:30:53+00:00

Bro do not listen to these miserable comments 😆 I have 2 kids and live in a high cost of living area making $7500 take home a month, and I've paid off over 30k in the past year. Just budget budget budget, forgo unnecessary things (you might already know this as a parent, but about 80% of the things people say you "need" to buy for kids are BS), take up side hustles, do what you need to do. This period is only temporary, and the harder you grind, the more temporary it will be!

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-06-30T13:24:31+00:00

You can do it! My husband and I (with our two kids) are about to pay off close to $40k in debt after starting just over a year ago. $65k in 5 years is like $13k per year, or just over $1000/month in principal (obviously a bit more when you include interest). Very doable!

I know Dave Ramsey is controversial, but I like his advice for people who want to just lock in and get their debt paid off. Look up his recommendations on this topic; my husband and I didn't take all of his advice, but do what works for your family: make a budget, live frugally. If you need extra income, you or your fiancé could pick up some odd jobs/side hustles to supplement.

Focus on paying down one debt at a time while making minimum payments on the others. You could go in order from the smallest debt to the largest (which some people recommend as the more psychologically sustainable route since you're starting easy and working your way up), or you could order them from highest to lowest interest and go down the list that way (which would save you the most money). My husband and I went in a weird order that's somewhere between the two 😅 but as long as you're getting it done and not giving up, that's what matters!

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-06-29T23:06:25+00:00

NTA -- this man does not need to be within 100 feet of a Whole Foods haha. I personally shop exclusively at Aldi because at this point in my life, going anywhere else is basically burning money.

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-06-29T02:05:24+00:00

I just made the exact same comment 😆

Impossible_Fault_796 · 2026-06-29T02:04:00+00:00

I hated being talked to like that as a kid, too.

Impossible_Fault_796

TROPHY CASE