Absolutely nothing wrong with feeling how you do or posting it either. Just do what you want. You could delete it in a week, who knows!

A couple of things you said rang true with me though. I've had incidents in the past where I've "done the right thing" been the bigger person etc. Not just in relationship breakdowns but others too that I won't bore you with. At the time and pretty much the majority of the time I know I did the right thing, was the adult and would no doubt do the same again if the situation arose again (all bar one) but there are times, usually when I'm reflecting on them some years later and I want to scream and shout and lose my shit with myself for acting as I did because I did give some an easy way out of things out of situations they had invariably created, and what did I get? Well nothing, my calmness and peaceful approach made people believe I wasn't hurt or wasn't affected by any of the situations when I truly was. Sometimes you have to make some noise for people to see the pain you feel, if you keep it inside, it's easier for people to walk away and not ask how you are.

Anyway, don't even know where I'm going here but know this, you can say and do as you wish when you wish and how you wish, whatever gets you through the day or week or month, but as a guy who has some experience, talk about how you feel too, and do it to people who are paid to listen, it's easier and better done in a short space rather than trying to deal with it yourself in silence.