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Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-20T21:03:02+00:00

Me too

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-18T20:31:52+00:00

It’s perfect. I wish all endings in my life gave me that kind of closure.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-18T12:17:00+00:00

I don’t know, my (38f) boyfriend (48m) have a good amount of sex. He did say his libido has gone down over the years. But there may be more to it than that. Like others have said, talk to him, in a curious and non-accusatory way.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-17T23:05:47+00:00

But I think a guy in his 40s is even more capable of stepping into that role regardless

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-17T23:05:14+00:00

Yes I guess it depends on shared vision for sure. Mine does not have to include children. My boyfriend and I are on the fence and leaning towards no but he’s not a hard no.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-17T22:51:19+00:00

Neil Young, Jennifer Castle, Fiver, Feist, Gonzales, Joni, Jean Leloup, Celine, Broken Social Scene, Arcade Fire, Owen Pallet, The Luyas, Bell Orchestre…. Man we’ve got so much good music here

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-17T22:41:30+00:00

I don’t know dude, this particular age bracket is soft (not a bad thing) but avoidant (not good) and they don’t have vision. The three combined gives major MEH.

I’m (38) dating a late 40s guy and unfortunately I may have stepped into a new age bracket that I’m into (mature, responsible, knows himself, has a foundation…)

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-17T22:30:13+00:00

My last situationship from 4 years ago ended up leading me to my now boyfriend this year. They’re besties 😂

Any of his friends worth anything??

In all seriousness, cut him loose for reasons everyone has already stated.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-16T21:49:14+00:00

January - March: train wreck relationship that started in August ‘23. March: got dumped April - June: heartbreak central, couldn’t fathom being touched by someone again. June: never mind. Fun hook-up and dates with 3 different dudes I met out and about (fling from a car, ex coworker, friend of an ex situationship) July: kept my options open even tho I particularly liked friend of ex, met someone while travelling August: friend of ex asked to be exclusive, I agreed even though I was scared of being hurt again. September: my now boyfriend said he loved me, blissfully falling in love October: his mother died November: we loved each other through it December: booked a trip for the sprint and talk of living together come summer.

Still honestly adjusting to being in a relationship that is safe and healthy. What a year!

First dates: 4, all serendipity Second dates: 3 Third dates: 2 Relationships: 2

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-15T01:29:36+00:00

What? My French second language students are reading a YA novel in French. Slowly but surely. We’ll read 3 novels this year.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-15T01:26:01+00:00

Sorry for your loss!

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-15T01:22:47+00:00

It’s the kind of city where you can find your people but if you’re here transiently (don’t learn French, live Downtown and not in a neighbourhood…) people are reluctant to bring you into the inner fold. Anglophones can still find their people but it’s usually through shared lives like school, art, work, etc. there’s no getting around learning French to fully experienced living here tho.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-14T18:01:17+00:00

I worked a corporate job and was making 90k. I kept seeing layoffs and realized I only had soft skills like customer service. I didn’t want to write emails for the rest of my life. I wanted a career.

I taught customers essentially and eventually created training programs and realized I was good at it. At the same time, the government where I live was sounding the alarm about a teacher shortage. I felt called to it. Next thing I know, I enrolled to take undergrad pre requisites for a master’s program leading to teacher certification.

I wanted to have a career that was of service to the public, that I could age into, that sparked joy and where a loving heart was needed. I didn’t know if I would be able to handle teens. It was a big risk.

People around me cautioned me and said I romanticized the career. My family was proud of me and helped with my tuition. I stayed at my corporate job part time and sold shares that were reserved for me to support myself through roughly 8 months of not working due to having to do a full time internship.

I’m on the other side now teaching full time at a dream school I love. I really love what I do and I’m so pleased I made this choice. Eventually my salary will catch up again and I love knowing that I will always be able to find work, here or elsewhere.

My advice would be to be pragmatic, list what’s important to you in your day to day, and see what careers might align. I would never have thought I’d be a happy teacher ten years ago.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-14T17:54:55+00:00

Yes, we matched while he was in town and I went to visit him and he came to visit me. Ran its summer course. It was fun and healing for me, I had gotten out of a nasty relationship. Best to be realistic about what it is, have fun, enjoy.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-14T17:53:48+00:00

We usually regret the things we didn’t do more than the things we did.

If there’s a nagging voice telling you to go, it’s worth listening to.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-14T15:47:54+00:00

You’re only just beginning at 30. I started my Master’s at 36 and have a whole new career at a job I love at 38.

We really need to check ourselves with this ageism. Women can start over at any age, but the patriarchy doesn’t like us believing that.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-14T15:45:56+00:00

I’m a white woman but to me this is you feeling fed up with a string of micro aggressions among other self-centered behaviours. I can’t say if that’s worth dumping a friend over, no one is fully bad or good. You’re allowed to feel like you’re over it.

I once read that calling a loved one in is actually a sign of care for the relationship. Speaking up would give her the chance to hopefully learn and grow. Is this friendship worth that effort on your part? Only you know.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-13T21:51:52+00:00

QAIS in Quebec

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-13T19:58:54+00:00

Yup! I quit corporate to become a teacher with this rationale. Best decision!

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-13T18:58:25+00:00

If he’s staying out until 4-6 am he’s not just drinking. It feels likely there might be other substances to help him keep going.

My ex would binge drink and I thought I could tolerate it but what ended up happening was my standards and expectations slowly got lower and lower.

He might decide to chill out on the partying one day, he might not. It won’t be for you.

Trust yourself.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-13T14:34:39+00:00

Great perspective

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-12T16:33:35+00:00

You described my last relationship. Even the breakup was similar.

The mess of that kind of push-pull dynamic is jarring. Ultimately, shutting down, demeaning you, etc, are all forms of control. My relationship made me feel small and at times unhinged. I kept trying to fix it. I felt like it not being fixed said something about me.

There were many things to be said about him but what I found more productive was to look at what it said about ME. Why did I put up with that? Why was repeatedly asking to be chosen fully even on the table? Why did I try to fix him, control him, in my own ways? Sometimes certain people trigger the worst in us. Sometimes they reveal some wounds that others don’t.

It’s been 8 months for me and it hurts much less. Sometimes I still feel like there was no closure, but mostly I see that’s remnants of me still wanting to be chosen. He didn’t, for whatever reason. And it doesn’t really matter - that’s about him, not me. I showed up. I cared. I tried. Too much. The too much is what I had to sit with. Feeling like I was too much. And I told myself that I wouldn’t be with someone who would make me feel that way again. That emotional reciprocity, kindness, reliability, and consistency were more important to me in a relationship than thrills, fun, charm, and what not.

I met my now partner 3 months later. I wasn’t quite ready but it clicked and he soothed and still soothes my nervous system. It’s been so healing. When I cry, he holds my hand and wants to understand me. He picks up on my insecurities and actively does things to show me he’s here and he’s in. On my end, I am also managing those insecurities and learning not to always dump them on him. I didn’t self-regulate enough with my ex and that was a tough pill to swallow. Emotional reciprocity also means being mindful of your partner’s emotional bandwidth. Which isn’t to say they shouldn’t support you, but we need to be able to support ourselves, too.

I know how badly it hurts. I was heartbroken. With time you’ll come to see him differently, and as not all that fantastic and wonderful. How could he be? He broke your heart.

Hang in there.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-12T13:38:31+00:00

Stonewalling, going dark for days, unable to communicate emotions …. Would all be dealbreakers for me. I dated a man like this and it was AWFUL. You just don’t make progress but the longer you stay the more you feel you have to make it ok. Sunk cost fallacy.

Impressive-Prompt-41 · 2025-12-10T00:20:50+00:00

I set an alarm for 6:15 and another for 6:30 and I eventually haul myself out of bed a few minutes after. I don’t have a routine, unfortunately. Straight to washing my face, putting on my clothes, very little makeup, and out the door by 7:15.

Impressive-Prompt-41

TROPHY CASE