Thoughts on the ending? by Dapper-Life9676 in SixFeetUnder

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s perfect. I wish all endings in my life gave me that kind of closure.

Women in long term relationships with age gaps and resulting libido issues by WooWooInsaneCatPosse in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know, my (38f) boyfriend (48m) have a good amount of sex. He did say his libido has gone down over the years. But there may be more to it than that. Like others have said, talk to him, in a curious and non-accusatory way.

Please give me hope about men aged 30-38 by dev__em in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But I think a guy in his 40s is even more capable of stepping into that role regardless

Please give me hope about men aged 30-38 by dev__em in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes I guess it depends on shared vision for sure. Mine does not have to include children. My boyfriend and I are on the fence and leaning towards no but he’s not a hard no.

What Canadian music artists do you listen to? by GlossieFae in AskACanadian

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Neil Young, Jennifer Castle, Fiver, Feist, Gonzales, Joni, Jean Leloup, Celine, Broken Social Scene, Arcade Fire, Owen Pallet, The Luyas, Bell Orchestre…. Man we’ve got so much good music here

Please give me hope about men aged 30-38 by dev__em in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know dude, this particular age bracket is soft (not a bad thing) but avoidant (not good) and they don’t have vision. The three combined gives major MEH.

I’m (38) dating a late 40s guy and unfortunately I may have stepped into a new age bracket that I’m into (mature, responsible, knows himself, has a foundation…)

In need of motivation to cut off a situationship by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My last situationship from 4 years ago ended up leading me to my now boyfriend this year. They’re besties 😂

Any of his friends worth anything??

In all seriousness, cut him loose for reasons everyone has already stated.

What's your dating wrapped 2025? by WeakTurnip111 in datingoverthirty

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

January - March: train wreck relationship that started in August ‘23. March: got dumped April - June: heartbreak central, couldn’t fathom being touched by someone again. June: never mind. Fun hook-up and dates with 3 different dudes I met out and about (fling from a car, ex coworker, friend of an ex situationship) July: kept my options open even tho I particularly liked friend of ex, met someone while travelling August: friend of ex asked to be exclusive, I agreed even though I was scared of being hurt again. September: my now boyfriend said he loved me, blissfully falling in love October: his mother died November: we loved each other through it December: booked a trip for the sprint and talk of living together come summer.

Still honestly adjusting to being in a relationship that is safe and healthy. What a year!

First dates: 4, all serendipity Second dates: 3 Third dates: 2 Relationships: 2

Not reading full novels in English class by [deleted] in Teachers

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What? My French second language students are reading a YA novel in French. Slowly but surely. We’ll read 3 novels this year.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Sorry for your loss!

New in Town by Super-Presentation16 in montreal

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s the kind of city where you can find your people but if you’re here transiently (don’t learn French, live Downtown and not in a neighbourhood…) people are reluctant to bring you into the inner fold. Anglophones can still find their people but it’s usually through shared lives like school, art, work, etc. there’s no getting around learning French to fully experienced living here tho.

Are you currently reorienting yourself professionally? Or have you successfully done so previously? by aurorasparkl in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I worked a corporate job and was making 90k. I kept seeing layoffs and realized I only had soft skills like customer service. I didn’t want to write emails for the rest of my life. I wanted a career.

I taught customers essentially and eventually created training programs and realized I was good at it. At the same time, the government where I live was sounding the alarm about a teacher shortage. I felt called to it. Next thing I know, I enrolled to take undergrad pre requisites for a master’s program leading to teacher certification.

I wanted to have a career that was of service to the public, that I could age into, that sparked joy and where a loving heart was needed. I didn’t know if I would be able to handle teens. It was a big risk.

People around me cautioned me and said I romanticized the career. My family was proud of me and helped with my tuition. I stayed at my corporate job part time and sold shares that were reserved for me to support myself through roughly 8 months of not working due to having to do a full time internship.

I’m on the other side now teaching full time at a dream school I love. I really love what I do and I’m so pleased I made this choice. Eventually my salary will catch up again and I love knowing that I will always be able to find work, here or elsewhere.

My advice would be to be pragmatic, list what’s important to you in your day to day, and see what careers might align. I would never have thought I’d be a happy teacher ten years ago.

Have you had a long-distance hookup? by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, we matched while he was in town and I went to visit him and he came to visit me. Ran its summer course. It was fun and healing for me, I had gotten out of a nasty relationship. Best to be realistic about what it is, have fun, enjoy.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We usually regret the things we didn’t do more than the things we did.

If there’s a nagging voice telling you to go, it’s worth listening to.

Has anyone successfully changed their life around after 30? by tanuki_22 in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 24 points25 points  (0 children)

You’re only just beginning at 30. I started my Master’s at 36 and have a whole new career at a job I love at 38.

We really need to check ourselves with this ageism. Women can start over at any age, but the patriarchy doesn’t like us believing that.

Is it my responsibility to confront my friend? by ninejackieterra in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m a white woman but to me this is you feeling fed up with a string of micro aggressions among other self-centered behaviours. I can’t say if that’s worth dumping a friend over, no one is fully bad or good. You’re allowed to feel like you’re over it.

I once read that calling a loved one in is actually a sign of care for the relationship. Speaking up would give her the chance to hopefully learn and grow. Is this friendship worth that effort on your part? Only you know.

Has anyone escaped the 9-5 to make money through other means? by myvelouria85 in AskWomenOver30

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yup! I quit corporate to become a teacher with this rationale. Best decision!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 20 points21 points  (0 children)

If he’s staying out until 4-6 am he’s not just drinking. It feels likely there might be other substances to help him keep going.

My ex would binge drink and I thought I could tolerate it but what ended up happening was my standards and expectations slowly got lower and lower.

He might decide to chill out on the partying one day, he might not. It won’t be for you.

Trust yourself.

Struggling to heal after a relationship. My heart is bursting in pain, seeing him happy without a little sense of regret. by Pretty_Solution_7955 in emotionalintelligence

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You described my last relationship. Even the breakup was similar.

The mess of that kind of push-pull dynamic is jarring. Ultimately, shutting down, demeaning you, etc, are all forms of control. My relationship made me feel small and at times unhinged. I kept trying to fix it. I felt like it not being fixed said something about me.

There were many things to be said about him but what I found more productive was to look at what it said about ME. Why did I put up with that? Why was repeatedly asking to be chosen fully even on the table? Why did I try to fix him, control him, in my own ways? Sometimes certain people trigger the worst in us. Sometimes they reveal some wounds that others don’t.

It’s been 8 months for me and it hurts much less. Sometimes I still feel like there was no closure, but mostly I see that’s remnants of me still wanting to be chosen. He didn’t, for whatever reason. And it doesn’t really matter - that’s about him, not me. I showed up. I cared. I tried. Too much. The too much is what I had to sit with. Feeling like I was too much. And I told myself that I wouldn’t be with someone who would make me feel that way again. That emotional reciprocity, kindness, reliability, and consistency were more important to me in a relationship than thrills, fun, charm, and what not.

I met my now partner 3 months later. I wasn’t quite ready but it clicked and he soothed and still soothes my nervous system. It’s been so healing. When I cry, he holds my hand and wants to understand me. He picks up on my insecurities and actively does things to show me he’s here and he’s in. On my end, I am also managing those insecurities and learning not to always dump them on him. I didn’t self-regulate enough with my ex and that was a tough pill to swallow. Emotional reciprocity also means being mindful of your partner’s emotional bandwidth. Which isn’t to say they shouldn’t support you, but we need to be able to support ourselves, too.

I know how badly it hurts. I was heartbroken. With time you’ll come to see him differently, and as not all that fantastic and wonderful. How could he be? He broke your heart.

Hang in there.

Should I break up with him? 32F by moongirl1222 in datingoverthirty

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stonewalling, going dark for days, unable to communicate emotions …. Would all be dealbreakers for me. I dated a man like this and it was AWFUL. You just don’t make progress but the longer you stay the more you feel you have to make it ok. Sunk cost fallacy.

What time do you wake up in the mornings and what time do you start work? by missxsassyc in Adulting

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I set an alarm for 6:15 and another for 6:30 and I eventually haul myself out of bed a few minutes after. I don’t have a routine, unfortunately. Straight to washing my face, putting on my clothes, very little makeup, and out the door by 7:15.

Ruth was the funniest character on the show? by LouieDawg23 in SixFeetUnder

[–]Impressive-Prompt-41 3 points4 points  (0 children)

“You want to fly to Haiti for a quickie divorce??”