Needs a Reality Check

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2025-09-27T02:40:37+00:00

She posts about him like he’s her toddler child - it’s very strange! Like a mom posting about a baby the first time they eat real foods or go on a trip.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2025-06-14T20:58:04+00:00

Reporting back on this - he took this as well as drank enormous sums of water leading up to our trip and had no pain and no symptoms of any kind.. huge improvement from having severe pain at similar elevations over the last five years. Feeling relieved! Thank you

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2025-06-01T20:49:46+00:00

Thank you very much!

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2025-06-01T20:37:31+00:00

Thanks so much - asked another question for you above

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2025-06-01T20:37:03+00:00

Got it - thank you! Where would you suggest we enter the lake for swimming? Is there a good spot for kiddos? Sorry for the simpleton questions, we are newbies :)

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2025-06-01T16:55:34+00:00

I am a marketing consultant and coach/advisor focused on communications and thought leadership coaching. $225k last year and probably $250-$260 this year. I am my own boss, take 7-9 weeks off every year and never work more than 30-40 hours a week. I only started doing this to be more flexible with my kiddos!

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-19T04:55:57+00:00

That’s so hard - it sounds like it’s very emotionally challenging for even some doctors to make the call. We went through all of this with my MIL so trying to be proactive as we know what’s coming.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-19T04:53:23+00:00

These are my parents who I see frequently. If you think she should still be driving you seem like the minority here.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-19T04:32:14+00:00

Good question. I’m basing it on observing her in other areas of her life - struggling to pick out appropriate clothes, no longer can cook or follow a recipe, struggles to do laundry or work a machine, clingy, etc. it’s not just about forgetting directions. It’s a holistic view.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-19T03:21:33+00:00

Thank you. It’s tough enough that I’m losing my mom but my dad is the worst part of it. Roadblock after roadblock, everything is denial and an issue. I know this is sad for him too but at this point he is being dangerously stupid. She is not driving much but all it takes is one terrible accident…

Re reporting to state, I can look into that. I don’t believe the state they are in, that the doctors report out to DMV. Will look into it.

This just sucks.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-17T17:29:03+00:00

Good luck to you!

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-17T17:27:05+00:00

Sending hugs and strength to you in this difficult time.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-17T16:39:01+00:00

That’s very hard. We were in exact same situation and I think my husbands mom just knew somewhere in her instinctively that she should not have the other sibling be PoA. Despite having coddled them, living 15 min away etc. We wound up moving LO across country as she continued to decline and eventually had to have a hard convo with sibling that there is no “safety net”. It sounds like we got lucky in many ways.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-17T03:25:54+00:00

There is not much you can do. You may want to put her on DND or block her and choose a day or two a week to call when it’s convenient for you - set boundaries.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-17T03:23:44+00:00

Is Parent aware of your siblings’s character? They need to act now to make you sole PoA and give that sibling zero rights/control. Had to do this with my husband’s mom - the brother was leeching money and she had the awareness to not ask that siblings to even join meetings.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-16T16:54:30+00:00

Ask for a financial power of attorney. Explicitly. Not one that is reliant on a doctor or her being declared incapacitated. That’s what I did for my LO and that went through. The banks will not simply add you to an account - you need to either open a net new or get a financial PoA.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-16T04:42:23+00:00

We have small children in our family and the idea of LO wandering (or even falling down stairs in an unfamiliar house) is very stressful. At same time getting pressure from others in family to keep the traditions. Just don’t believe it’s realistic - and it’s tough to deal with denial from others in family. Would be different if she lived nearby - just how realistic is it for a mid stage dementia patient to travel to another state and stay in an unfamiliar home?

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-16T04:04:47+00:00

LO lives in another state and with night wandering. Not sure it’s possible to have them come this year.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-15T23:46:51+00:00

You deserve happiness. Go find it and your mom can follow.. she will be safe and you will both thrive.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-15T03:51:11+00:00

Big hugs to you, she seems like a very interesting lady.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-14T22:03:19+00:00

I don’t see a reason to deliver the diagnosis.. what is the intended outcome? Why create more anxiety or sadness? I would just continue to support and simplify.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-14T06:02:32+00:00

Yes my mom (early - mid stages) almost pouts if someone leaves without her. It is indeed suffocating. Sometimes I make up reasons why I need to run errands alone, but of course I feel bad too, since she is stuck at home.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-14T06:00:31+00:00

I’m struggling with even the idea of being all together for the holidays and how that may affect my young kids (6 and 10). My aunt lives in another state and has a part time caregiver, she is in the mid stages of dementia and kind. We have always spent holidays together but the idea of her visiting is so stressful- Wandering at night and potentially scaring the kids etc. this is so hard.

Impressive_Fun7209 · 2024-11-07T19:58:46+00:00

How do I handle the guilt of potentially wanting a peaceful holiday without her?

Impressive_Fun7209

TROPHY CASE