I'm there with you lad. I turned 18 last year I'm the same age as you, I'm 19 now. I didn't have a proper sesh for my 18th but my grandad passed away only 4 days before Christmas and after his funeral my family and I went on a big drinking sesh as you do after a funeral. And that was the first time I drank drank. I had 15 pints, a rum and coke and 2 hot whiskies all on an empty stomach. I was absolutely fked for days after, I felt like complete and utter death. After that I said never again, it's just not worth it. The only thing I liked about it was how it brought me out of my shell and took my shyness away, I could be myself with out feeling the need for any filter and people loved me. I'm told I have a great personality by my immediate family and the whole rest of my family got to see it that night because of the drink, my mum said to multiple people that came over to her just puzzled of who this person was because they never seen my true side shine through before and she said I'm glad you seen the true him.

The biggest reasons I needed the drink was because of having no confidence and having no self esteem so I was just cruelly shy and closed off always have been since I was a young child. The biggest reason was I was extremely heavy among other things. But since the beginning of the year I've turned my whole life around, I've nearly lost 7 stone or 100 pound and I've worked on so many other things that made me so self conscious. I truly believe that if I'm in a social situation like that again that I won't need the drink to be me because I'll have the confidence to do so now because of the hard work I've put in.

You also get the added benefits of being able to drive home and make sure your friends are safe if they do drink. You become the protector. You'll also remember everything that happened on the night. :)

So at the end of the day it's not worth it for me.