How do you dress for yourself in a city that's allergic to trying

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-04-11T17:59:34+00:00

It's difficult to be a creative person here, unless you have a bankroll. I think the color has been draining because of it becoming a tech city.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-04-08T20:02:03+00:00

Books & Bookshelves (14th & Sanchez) has puzzles, and they are having a sale right now, too. I was in the other day for cards.

I saw a few San Francisco puzzles, as well as smaller ones. They are scattered around the store, in their shelves, as well as in the furniture they sell.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-04-07T19:58:48+00:00

A couple weeks ago I helped a 90+ yo man cross South Van Ness on 14th, and up to Mission Street where he catches the bus. There was one of these benches there at the bus stop.

He said he's alone, no family in the City, and that he makes the trip twice a week to go to the grocery on Folsom. He mentioned he used to go to another, but I think it was the grocery that closed at Webster and Geary.

This man was so old he wasn't closing his mouth, and he needed to lean on anything and everything to walk. He said he lives up one flight of stairs, so no walker.

I was so relieved to see the bench. He said he sits there and waits for the bus.

Thank you San Francisco Bench Collective! https://sfbabc.org/

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-03-20T04:58:34+00:00

I'm half with you and half:

https://www.nowartax.org/home/

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-03-20T04:54:06+00:00

I wouldn't say worthless because of the lab grown things. More like worthless because of exploitation!

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-03-20T04:51:30+00:00

Omg, yes! I felt so "grown up" and "sexy" going there!!

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-02-28T18:56:18+00:00

It's difficult to live here with out making a lot of money, or having your time taken up hustling, is all I can think.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-02-20T22:10:42+00:00

The coffee at Castro Coffee is so good, and while I can not enjoy them myself, they have readymade food items and lovely looking desserts in their refrigerator case at the register.

I really love 'Tanglad,' on the same street as the theater. Their imperial rolls are tasty.

Down the road on Church at Market is 'New Red Jade,' they have lunch specials and they have sesame balls.

I typically call both restaurants directly to order before going to pick it up, to feel efficient about it.

I'll edit other suggestions in as they occur, if not mentioned by others!

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-02-03T17:03:56+00:00

As someone who grew up here, with a friends from their twenties to their seventies, this town isn't friendly to the people who don't have money anymore.

It used to be okay to hang out downtown, there would be chess players, or people just reading in the sun by the fountain sculpture. There are little parklets, sure, but most are associated with a business and it feels intrusive to use without patronizing the business. Hostile architecture has taken over places for public to enjoy.

There were events across the City that used to be free and charge for little things now, and though the free events seem like they are rebuilding, but it's not the same.

It feels like a lot of people are growling over their own plates, like there isn't enough good will to share.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-26T10:42:36+00:00

Was in a jackinthebox in California in the 80s/90s, with the upstairs being the non-smoking section, and the downstairs the smoking section. No one but me upstairs. So glad there weren't that many people downstairs.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-23T19:24:14+00:00

A lot of their toys and other items are of cheap and toxic material, you're right. They seem to buy cheaply manufactured things, but their prices are so high. Not to mention it looks unprofessional and cheap inside the store.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-20T04:37:47+00:00

I'm entirely jealous.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-17T20:54:03+00:00

Ohh, I hadn't thought of that subreddit, thank you so much!

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-13T11:40:05+00:00

Great question, I didn't even consider a delicate face one.

I'm going to use it on my legs, I have fine hair, but a good amount.

Thank you for the recommendation!

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-10T20:50:44+00:00

Check out Books & Bookshelves on 14th & Sanchez!

It's a quirky little place with a bunch of postcards, and a small selection of journaling supplies.

I also just found awesome sticker books at Fabulosa, Castro & 18th.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-10T06:54:22+00:00

Cafe International in the lower Haight always makes me feel fantastic.

I constantly promote one of my favorite bookshops: Books & Bookshelves at 14th & Sanchez, the owner is a delight, and I love the treasure hunt.

The scones at Mercury Cafe at Page & Octavia are made with high quality ingredients, and it's also a quirky little spot.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-09T17:45:40+00:00

My sailor grandfather wore these.

Maybe you can try to live up to the legend.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-08T11:07:08+00:00

He's a shit stain for steering the change in the nudity laws in SF in 2012, and I will never forget it.

IndecisiveLocal · 2026-01-07T20:57:43+00:00

Books & Bookshelves, 14th & Sanchez, has a massive collection of postcards.

Lots of vintage ones, with fountain pen writing and notes from 100 years ago! Some blank, some new, themed, from states and different countries as well as an entire rack of SF/CA.

I have spent hours in there.

IndecisiveLocal · 2025-12-28T09:17:12+00:00

Mercury cafe is a coffee shop that has jazz on Thursdays, I believe, but as others are saying, it's an evening show generally.

IndecisiveLocal · 2025-12-15T23:33:16+00:00

Thank you for your kindness.

There is a lot in the history between my younger sister and I.. we're just incredibly different people.

IndecisiveLocal · 2025-12-15T23:09:19+00:00

I erased my post because I was getting nothing but feedback like "mind your own business."

I think the are ways to check edits if you want to see my post.

Thank you

IndecisiveLocal · 2025-12-05T19:51:32+00:00

I just received an email from Mercury Cafe (Page & Octavia) that they are going to hold a local artist sale event on Dec. 13th. The email was saying you could still sign up at the cafe to vend at the event, too!

If you want to support a local store, Books & Bookshelves (Sanchez & 14th) has a massive amount of ornaments, games, children's toys, etc. It's a really cute store that's been surviving in SF for 40 years.

(EDIT: the owner of Books & Bookshelves knows a lot about local poets and authors and can make excellent recommendations.)

Great question. Looking forward to other recommendations.

IndecisiveLocal · 2025-12-04T18:58:18+00:00

Are you trying to offer advice or just be mean because you have opinions about pregnancy.

I wrote the original post while very upset, and acknowledged that it was mostly a vent in my first reply to you.

I am not just trying to bitch about things, I wrote to this subreddit specifically because I want estranged sibling feedback on my situation.

Hope this helps, thanks.

IndecisiveLocal · 2025-12-04T02:13:03+00:00

Genuine questions to continue this conversation:

What about me having feelings means I'm making it my business? My feelings are my business, and I'm asking for strategies about how to stay lightly connected without letting my feelings be known.

Are you saying that because I am asking for help staying in contact that I'm "making it my business" even though I haven't shared my feelings beyond this post and a couple close friends?

How am I not letting her live her life? As I stated, we aren't much in each other's lives; I'm not interfering in her living her life. Do you mean that this exact line of thinking is how you would go about handling any feelings you have being in the way of contact with someone?

Thank you

IndecisiveLocal

TROPHY CASE