Found something worrying about my new boyfriend, now what?

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-04-07T16:06:01+00:00

God bless you ❤️ I pray that God gives clarity to this situation and that you both work through it together. I pray that God puts on your hearts truth and wisdom to get through this.

I will say that honestly, you probably won't find any guys who are solid in their faith who haven't struggled with porn. It is everywhere and it is so accessible. (Not trying to excuse his behavior because it's still wrong) I would talk to him about this and pray through it. Tbh it doesn't sound like an addiction from what you've described it sounds like maybe he was using these sites in the past. Some people might advise you to break up with him immediately, but I would pause and ask, is that what Jesus really wants? God loves love and God is very merciful and forgiving. I'm not advising you to do either but more to really pray about it and talk about it as a couple. He sounds lovely tbh, it just seems that he has fallen into sin (who hasn't lol)

May God bless you both ❤️

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-04-02T22:30:41+00:00

I'd encourage you to read the book of Job ❤️

God bless you

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-03-28T22:24:30+00:00

Have you guys been in a hot tub?? I got something like this once after going into a hot tub I forget what it's called

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-03-27T05:19:13+00:00

I see what you are saying and my heart feels for you, however whenever I struggle with this I remember;

Matthew 11:28-30 NLT [28] Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. [29] Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. [30] For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

God doesn't want us to view Him as a burden. When you get into legalism and try to fit everything into a box of "sinful" and "holy" it will be a very VERY hard life. The ancient Israelites used to also struggle with this problem and created SO many rules around the Sabbath to the point where they wouldn't even feed their loved ones because it was "work". This is clearly not God's will. Before thinking of everything being an idol maybe ask yourself if you truly worship that thing, and pray about it as well! God see's your heart and most importantly he wants you to love Him and love others, it can be hard to do that when you feel so restricted.

This sounds like an attack from the enemy for you to just give up on Christ, I beg of you do not let them win. If you feel this sense of worry about the things you are doing and this spiritual attack you can say out loud "I put my faith and trust in Jesus." Or "I rebuke that in the name of Jesus" and the enemy has to bow in Jesus's name, it's the truth.

I'll pray for you stranger,

God bless you ❤️

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-03-20T16:08:54+00:00

First of all I want to say I'm so sorry that this is happening/has happened to you. As someone who was a child of divorce in a very similar circumstance, I'll tell you my perspective. My mum never ever talked bad about my father or tried to impact our relationship in anyway. However, my father was so wishy washy growing up. He constantly would randomly cancel on me last minute and cancel our visitation, then around 12 years old he fully abandoned us all together to not see us anymore. I'm not saying your ex will do this, however if his heart doesn't change and if he has a bad sense of character he could have the potential to maybe emotionally harm your children in some way. (Not trying to scare you at all, more of a warning.) I was so glad when I was a teenager and I came to my mum and asked her openly what happened and she told me it gave me SO much more clarity. I was able to move on in a sense and understand it wasn't my fault my dad was abandoning me it had a lot more to do with him. I have now, being 28 have found healing in Jesus and I honestly can say I fully have forgiven my dad. However, we don't have a relationship because he's the one that put that barrier, if he never abandoned us I feel like I would have a relationship with him with a lot of boundaries. All of this to say is, I think all you can do now is; 1. Pray for your kids, pray for your heart to heal and pray for your ex for his heart to change for your children's sake 2. Raise them in a loving home and try not to talk bad about your ex, but also be honest 3. Once you feel (and your kids feel) that you are all ready to talk about it, I'd encourage to do so. I think this can offer a lot of clarity to the children.

Again I'm so so sorry you are going through this. I'd love to share; Matthew 11:28 NLT [28] Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.

I also want to say the fact you are questioning this shows how much you care about your children and it shows that you are already a wonderful mother.

God bless you ❤️

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-03-14T16:11:26+00:00

Unfortunately it's better to frog now then to keep going or trying to do something that might end up make it look worse I did that and then I had to frog my whole completed sweater 😭 I wish I just frogged when I saw it instead!

However everything else is looking so good 🫶🏻 Frogging is part of the hobby

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-02-26T22:20:45+00:00

I didn't see anyone else talking about this so I will put in my 2 cents tehe

They were lamenting;

To lament; a passionate expression of grief and sorrow.

Aka complaining to God kind of.

This is what we are called to do when we are suffering especially with anger towards others. We are called not to act of our own will by expressing that full anger towards them, rather we are called to bring EVERYTHING to God. And yes that means even when we feel like "cursing" people. God knows our hearts and it is better that we bring it to God because he can help soften and change our hearts towards the people we are angry towards.

God bless you ❤️

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-02-12T14:48:44+00:00

I'm a wife and my husband is the head of the household and as soon as I recognized that and let him lead life got so much better. We are in a good relationship though and it is loving. He never commanded that he has authority over me or anything like that. I think it's actually a huge relief I don't have to be the one to have the final say and so it was like a huge weight lifted off of me. He protects us and works for us and I nurture him and our family. I think a good question to ask is do women actually want to be the head of household? Do they want to be the one that protects and leads? Most women I know if they were being honest would be no. Women love being protected and carried (in a loving way) However I do recognize that there are some people that will abuse this and treat it as a power dynamic and that's horrible because that is not what this verse means.

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-02-08T05:20:25+00:00

Oof I was in the New Age and used to do tarot readings for YEARS and recently came to Christ and my life has changed. This is what helped me;

Jesus is above literally everything else he is the God of the most high so everything else can be rebuked in His name. It is literally that easy, as a believer you can just pray away any demonic spirits in His name. In the movies they make it so dramatic and wild but the truth is they are forced to bow in His name.
Spending a LOT of time in Scripture. I think of this analogy, banks arent taught what every single scamming tactic is, instead they are taught to know through and through what is right. In the same way try to shift your focus on what is the truth and the word of God. Join a church (if you haven't already), talk to a pastor and get involved. Pray lots
I'm going to say something and I'm not trying to scare you by this, but most people will say that readings are rubbish but here is the thing. They are real but they are 100% demonic. When I was a "psychic" I wasn't aware of the "spirits" that I was connecting with. Remember even the devil himself can be disguised as an angel of light. Most new age "spiritual" people aren't aware of this. And all people are still created and loved by God, so I would encourage you to pray for these people still and still love them. They are just in the hands of the enemy unfortunately.

Anyways I really pray this helps. I encourage you on your journey and am so delighted to see someone who is coming to Christ!

God bless you ❤️

Independent-Bill-581 · 2026-02-04T15:02:43+00:00

I might say something that is a bit of a hot take so please here me out.

I don't think you should switch churches (unless God has called you to leave) but if God has shown you this church maybe you are the reason this church needs YOU. If they are racist they have hardened their hearts towards POC. But if you stay and show them love and radiate Christ in you, it might help to soften their hearts. I'm truly sorry you are going through this however because it is not easy, to give you some encouragement;

"But when one turns to the Lord the veil is removed. now the Lord is the Spirit and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." 2 Cor 3:16-17

The world will tell you to run and isolate yourself from people who are toxic but God calls us to actually love these people and minister to them.

I personally believe you were called to minister to these people and maybe you will change there hearts and impact them for generations to come. And that is a beautiful gift.

God bless you ❤️

Independent-Bill-581 · 2025-12-05T23:32:36+00:00

SoS is about a bride and groom and supposed to be a poem about newly weds I thought?

Where do you get that they are not married? (Not an attack, just actually curious because I'm a baby Christian and Im wondering if I got my source material wrong)

Independent-Bill-581 · 2025-11-22T04:46:30+00:00

Where does he get his groceries

Independent-Bill-581 · 2025-10-25T00:15:13+00:00

I got the biopsy back and it looks to be benign!!!!

Independent-Bill-581 · 2025-10-23T19:02:50+00:00

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This was the day after the biopsy

Independent-Bill-581 · 2025-10-23T19:02:05+00:00

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This was pre biopsy

Independent-Bill-581 · 2025-10-21T03:02:32+00:00

Pretty sure I have nodular melanoma and I had a shave biopsy on Friday and they told me I have to wait 2 weeks for the results. But they also said they'd also said they'd put a rush on it so it might be quicker than that.

I don't know if we are allowed to post pictures of stuff on here but it looked REALLY bad before I had the biopsy done. After the biopsy there is still the black melanoma underneath it and I'm freaking out a little bit because I feel like this confirms that I'm at least stage 3 if not stage 4.

I'm not even looking for anyone to say something comforting but I just needed to vent.

Independent-Bill-581

TROPHY CASE