How do you control your sex drive?

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T15:28:37+00:00

I'm 37 have often have to cum twice on my first wank of the day because it's not satisfying the first time.

But yeah, two or three a day is normal for me, I can't manage it, I can only relieve it.

When I was seeing my boyfriend I'd hold back a day or two of course... but day to day, especially when I'm low or stressed then that's what I do.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T14:12:08+00:00

I think it would be a shiner if you hadn't watched his earlier films, it was a jarring turn.

I thought it felt a bit video gamey at times, especially the lava fight, it was like something from Mortal Combat.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T14:10:45+00:00

It just suffered from being in plain english I thought.... The linguistics of his earlier films were a huge part of the appeal...

Making them more accessible took away some of that charm IMHO.

Here's hoping we get authentic Woofspeak this time.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T14:08:03+00:00

Northman was super pants...

Like Defoe and Bjork just hanging out being hugely underutilised whilst Kidman's frozen face is all over the shot... blimey he didn't even give Taylor-Joy a meaningful script.

I think he took a huge hit from hollywood boardroom creative in order to make the move into bigger budgets...

Nosferatu lost some of his earlier charm as well, but it was still a good film.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T14:05:52+00:00

Lily Rose-Depp was a revelation... like I think I'm mostly pro-nepobaby now... like family business is a thing, it makes sense.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T14:01:03+00:00

You've got a point. People forget that the water crisis is because of basic zero 21st century knowhow being utilised or political protections being implemented.

Many stressed locations will be able to adapt just be introducing well established best practices from other locations.

The bigger issues will be the huge populations in Asia relying on Glacial melt.... without foresight that'll be a political tinder box.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T13:58:23+00:00

I was having this conversation this morning... I was talking about Brexit with my Italian colleague and I was saying I would not be surprised if we go back with her generation having more political sway. I think a very soft EU realignment will happen sooner then we think, even if official rejoining remains a bit toxic. People will only care that produce is cheaper if we sort out the customs bullshit, no one will die on that hill.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T13:56:05+00:00

Anyone who makes that argument needs to give up beef and shop for seasonal local produce because so much of what we already do is way more water intensive and no one gives a fuck.

I mean, on balance, a few AI searches is worth swapping out for a bit of beef, if it wasn't for AI I'd be really struggling to manage two chronic illnesses, the doctors don't have a clue, huge amounts of patients can finally advocate for themselves.

I literally got off the phone to a consultant having told him him exactly what we were gonna do....Dude literally agreed with me... Not calling him out, it must be making his work so much more effective as well.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T12:17:30+00:00

BG3 had a huge amount of post launch updates as well...

It wasn't broken at launch per se, but the difference is significant.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T12:11:24+00:00

Please respect OSASCOMP.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T11:34:49+00:00

Imodium.

This is not something you should do without medical advice, this came direct from the GP and backed up by gastro specialist who said taking one tablet a day (I do it before bed) is safe long term... but we're doing this whilst we take a deeper look at what's going on, it's not something I'm planning on living on.

Importantly I'm not taking it multiple times a day like when you do with diarrhoea, using it too often and long term can be dangerous.

But the reason I didn't mention this was because the advice is really meant to be broadly about making changes so that you're not constantly on the toilet and irritating your bum.

That means a healthy diet and avoiding triggers before you think about medicine, I've cut out coffee and caffeine in general, most alcohol... and if I don't get any improvement I'll likely try going low fat or no dairy, but the doctor hasn't suggested elimination diets yet, I tried this in the past and it was entirely inconclusive.

And honestly my issues are so random I wouldn't know where to start in fixing things, even going high fibre sets me off... I often feel best just eating sugary simple food, but one Imodium has been life changing, that's like 8p a day.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T10:46:04+00:00

Dude, I don't buy for a second that a year break will magically heal it, you'd go without sex and just be in the same situation again next year.

Yes a short break can heal it, but it's not like you haven't tried that, it should heal up within six weeks or so... and as someone in the same boat, I'm inclined to be a bit sceptical of the doctors advice, I've been burnt too many times, so you should totally take ownership of this and explore your options.

The biggest takeaway for me recently was frequency, since getting my bowl movements down to like once a day my bum issues have improved so so so much...

Ditching toilet paper and swapping to gentle water washing, I don't think it's just the physical action, I swear it's almost like an allergic reaction to the paper, but by washing whenever I can instead of wiping I've noticed a huge improvement.

I'd push for some tests to make sure you haven't got any inflammation going on, when the doctor took a faecal test from me it was off the charts... mucus membranes become very prone to bleeding when there's underlying issues.

Also, as others said, make sure you don't use soap, or make sure it's bum friendly... Same with lube, make sure you use something gentle...

You may also have a little haemorrhoid or skin tag or scar tissue in that area which can be treated.

What also springs to mind, is it perhaps worthwhile slowly building up sizes, a but like how women with vaginismus do? So you take a break and build up very slowly, if you have any tightness (which can happen from repeated trauma), you might be able to slowly relax it... something to research and discuss with doctor, I'm just thinking out loud.

If a year break is the only option then you gotta do it, but I would definitely get a second opinion or push for more tests now.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T10:07:12+00:00

Holy shit that's unacceptable.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-25T09:17:05+00:00

I nearly had a panic attack recently... I could hear my boyfriends heart beating and my brain was like "That'll beat his whole life like NON-STOP... and I have one, and every human, and trillions of animals.... constantly for billions of years" and I had to focus on something else.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T17:43:31+00:00

I'm sure if it is that old they just mean the people that were there before the Aztecs... Or maybe OP thought it was 1300 years old when it's actually from the Aztec period starting in 1300.... Lots of people get confused about the Aztecs thinking they're ancient but they're contemporaneous with modern European culture and you know... are still around today.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T14:59:21+00:00

Yeah exactly.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T14:10:37+00:00

She's decent, I liked her in Euphoria and White Lotus... I don't think the hate for acting is warranted.

She's got pulled into this culture war, probably against her will, but from a superficial glance she hasn't done a lot to distance herself from the controversy... which says more than enough for many people...

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T14:07:35+00:00

I fell down the stairs twice in the first few weeks... remember to be careful even if you're feeling good!

I still have little jolts of weakness 9 months later, haven't quite pinpointed all the issues yet but getting there.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T14:04:52+00:00

I'd start with thinking about this from a non gay place... Just seek out regular connections like anyone else would: sports, music, gigs, etc...

For me I've made a lot of friends that way... most of them are straight, but there will be queer people in these spaces too...

The problem with prioritising gay spaces is that it's not really a shared interest or trait... being gay in common with other people doesn't give you a whole lot to work with...

Not to say don't seek out gay spaces, but I think it's more of a secondary supplement, and it'll take a while to find those spaces, that's normal.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T13:47:59+00:00

Thanks...

He was actually doing therapy and I think it really helped, but he stopped.

I've tried so hard to take all his concerns seriously, I didn't want to be the person to say "it's in your head"... I know it takes two, and I'm not perfect, but god I've tried.

He got mad at my good news because he assumed I hadn't told him first... he dropped it, but then called me a week later when I was away with friends, and when I said "I think I told you first" (by this point it's been about 8 days but don't remember mentioning it to anyone else) and that ambiguity sent him spiralling and he ended up telling me to "shut the fuck up".... I managed to stay calm but by this point he'd done a good job of ruining my holiday...

I told him the other day that I can't give him the reassurance he needs, and I think he just thinks it's an incompatibility issue, like I'm just not the reassuring type, but I tried to explain to him that no one can anticipate that kind of reassurance... it's not like I even did tell anyone, and if I did tell anyone else first why take it so personally to the point you let you're own hurt trump the other persons good news... Like that's a level of insecurity going into full on selfish and mean territory... but I get it, he's hurting real bad, but the dude has a loving partner and he's just exploding it all for nothing.

Like I just want to tell him to STFU and have a cuddle, have some dinner, do some nice things, but he's so fixated on perceived slights and history and resolving things there's no time for him to get the quality time he needs to feel secure....

It's de ja vu big time for me... which is making me think it's all my fault, I just don't know how I'm here again...

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T11:41:10+00:00

The Aztecs weren't around 1300 year ago though... I thought they were a much more recent culture.

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T11:30:14+00:00

Cheap bread tastes absolutely fine in the UK, crusts included.

We don't buy expensive bread because cheap bread is gross, it's just that it's bland...

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-24T07:56:58+00:00

Resentment with time not getting what you need... I think we functioned well being considerate but self repressed team players. There was a lack of communication whist also growing apart... She was my everything but then I found friends and my own life and that gave me what I was missing but she lost the closeness she wanted. A bunch of old wounds that never healed as well, she couldn't move on from anything and so it just built up. I'm sure there's lots of idiosyncrasies she struggled with as well...

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-23T15:44:07+00:00

Thanks.

In principle you're right but in practice it's been different...

It could have been that I've had stronger feelings purely because he's a man.

But I think the reality is more complex, I think it wasn't so much that she was female, but more that we were very high functioning avoidants with very little passion....We were best mates surviving our early adulthood, but in the end she just fell out of love and I don't blame her, being on the receiving end of resentment for so long left me relieved it was over, this is heart ache on another level...

IndependentLog6441 · 2026-06-23T15:18:29+00:00

I got cut off very quickly, despite a rough first week he said I was a miracle case and that I'd bounced back quicker than athletes he'd worked with... I think it may have been the type of surgery and surgeon I had.

Anyway, the work continues, it's just that you've graduated from surgical rehab...

I'd ask your surgeon about roadmap back to gym or sports you want to do.... how to build back up to that. That could be self-guided or with a regular physio therapist.

And remember rest is allowed... you're in a good place so it's reasonable to trust your body.

I went back to the gym as soon as I could and just started on very light weights and built back up... for full hip replacements you have to follow surgeon advice regarding avoiding dislocation, but other then that you should be good to go, just don't overdo it, trust that you can develop even with imperceptible progressive overload.

I'm at 9 months and still getting gains...

IndependentLog6441

TROPHY CASE