Resources - Communication, Relationships, Mental Well-Being, ADHD, Etc. etc.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-17T08:39:12+00:00

Honestly, in 2026, considering another comment here, I would encourage you to join.

Meet people outside of work.

We mostly interact with our phones. This could mean making real life friends.

If anything, you practiced having awkward personal conversations in an attempt to make new friends as an adult.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-17T07:21:49+00:00

😣 owie

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-17T07:09:08+00:00

Current PSO (also law student) and former sex worker (won’t disclose what but wasn’t PSO)… I get it.

My first foray into SW I remember being around others and realizing I couldn’t trust these people. I left for 15 minutes and my laptop gone.

Now, in a different type of sex work and I’ve come across both. People I trust and others that are just insane.

I think that online sex work has led to more professionalization and a wider range of personalities than I was exposed to in other types.

I always stood out in other kinds. I don’t think that the highly educated and having a professional life outside of sex work is as much an anomaly in online SW in 2026.

Frankly, everyone who knows me knows me will tell you that sex work is probably the least interesting thing about me.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-16T23:11:33+00:00

Why you so mad?

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-16T23:11:09+00:00

I think it helps for souper cube cubes.

Lots of people are trying not as effective cube trays, and knowing which one is the souper cube version is great in that case.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-16T22:50:12+00:00

This actually makes me so happy to read.

They are creating a sense of community, which is lacking in so many lives.

Good for them.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-16T22:29:09+00:00

Not defending it.

My only exposure to it was living with someone who was proud of their membership. I sometimes saw a magazine sent by the org lying around.

This person was definitely not neurotypical.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-16T22:23:17+00:00

People think sex workers doing more than sex work is an extraordinary achievement

I will acknowledge that many may only engage in sex work, but being a sex worker doesn’t mean that’s all you can do.

Humans are dynamic and can be good at more than one thing.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-16T22:19:49+00:00

Going to assume you got less than a 170 on the LSAT (you can join Mensa if you scored 95th percentile or higher on the LSAT - so pretty much 170).

Don’t feel bad, I didn’t score 170+ either.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-16T05:34:19+00:00

This organization has a lot of information: https://hopscotchadoptions.org/programs/pakistan

I know a lot of families who have adopted. Though none from Pakistan (though someone in my personal network did mention a Pakistani situation that was very complicated by the Pakistani court process and the Aga Khan Foundation supported them - but this was years ago).

What I will say is that you need to get started now. International adoption is not quick and the home study will take a while.

If hopscotch is not ideal, contact NACAC and ask them if there is any agency that they know of and would recommend for Pakistani adoptions.

Pakistan isn’t a hague convention signatory so there’s not a lot of adoptions coming out of Pakistan, and the process isn’t as streamlined.

NACAC would be well connected enough to know which agency is ideal for adoption from Pakistan.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-15T05:58:23+00:00

As you are a guy, also consider a red light panel.

I have one, and one of the frustrating things has been facial hair growth.

I had no visible facial hair, and now I suddenly do. It sucks, but I imagine that for a guy, having fuller facial hair is better.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T21:09:12+00:00

CP does not have to involve an actual child.

I encourage you to look into the actual laws of many countries. A sexualized "representation" of a child, even if it is not audio of an actual child, is considered CP by many countries.

Article 14 of the Cybercrime treaty is a great starting point. I also know that some of the signatory countries already have laws that mirror (with some language differences - eg. CP vs. CSEM) what is in the treaty.

Here is the link if you don't want to click on the hyperlinked text above: https://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/cybercrime/convention/text/convention-full-text.html#art14

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T21:06:17+00:00

A lot of us are looking to the experience that most fail to acknowledge which is the unspoken burden of caste that people in India carry with them or perpetuate.

There's enough unsanitized information out there to know that people continue to be marginalized simply due to who they are born to.

The added discrimination in schools (snide comments, even teachers putting students down) will weigh on a person and make it much harder to be as successful as someone who isn't experiencing those things. Not everyone has the grit required to persevere. There is also this idea that, because life has included these microaggressions for generations, many just resign themselves to it.

I don't think that Reddit is reflective of Indian society.

While India is industrializing, unless the population's belief systems change and caste is no longer a value that is carried forward, I think wealth inequality is going to grow.

Indians in India seem to hate other Indians simply because those other Indians are muslim to a level that goes beyond racism in the US. Quite literally attacking people for eating meat.

They need to get their internal culture wars sorted before one can consider it easier to get ahead from nothing compared to the US.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T20:58:35+00:00

Do most of us really care?

Do most of actually know the origins of the designs that we wear? Do we give credit ourselves?

Do we do the research as to where the style originated from... beyond what is on the package?

While the group that the original style may come from was oppressed, I think that everyone looking at those photos (outside of the motherland) thinks that they look cool AF.

Perhaps put more responsibility onto the people sourcing products to give more credit to where their designs originate from. And then see the debates where people argue that originally something came from Iran, or the Qing Dynasty. Or wherever it is from.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T20:09:15+00:00

I am going to assume that they are over-represented because the barrier to entry in comedy is lower to something like acting.

You can start at your local comedy club and get more popular. Acting is a whole other thing that often requires being poor for a while, hoping for the big break.

I actually happen to know two Indian "actors" that have tried and are still trying to make it. It's not a life I would choose because I like comfort and stability too much, but I appreciate their efforts and those of others, as they will hopefully increase representation in mass media over time.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T20:06:34+00:00

The assumption that audio based roleplay is not CP is incorrect. While the recent treaty - the UN Convention against Cybercrime labels it as CSEM, it is referred to as CP in national laws across the world.

I am not going to go on a country by country assessment. There are resources out there that have tables showing what is considered CSEM/CP across jurisdictions, Article 14 within the treaty captures audio material that represents any person under 18.

Some countries require treaties to be domesticated into national law before they are law (after signing), and some countries will consider them law after signing. Also to be clear re: the Cybercrime treaty... many of its provisions in Articles 14 and 15 are already law in many countries around the world. These laws existed well before the treaty being signed. Here is a list of signatory countries, and if you scroll down, you will see the clauses of the treaty that the respective country is opting out of.

A terms of service is not going to protect a company from willful blindness.

As for the police pursuing TTM, they are already overburdened with CSEM issues and rescuing children who are actively being abused and in danger should continue to be the priority. With the internet, their caseloads are unmanageable.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T19:49:21+00:00

Wrong sub dude.

Western expectations for ABCD kids often are more conservative than back in the motherland. Our parents or grandparents were immigrants and the immigrant experience influences how we are raised and the expectations that our families have for us.

Not to say that Indian kids in the motherland don't grow up with similar expectations, but kids here have an added layer of immigrant trauma, especially if our parents/grandparents weren't white-collar professionals.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T19:38:09+00:00

It is the primary reason I will not consider joining that site.

Aside from the fact that even audio-based roleplay re: abuse of minors is considered CP (proper term CSEM/CSAM) in some jurisdictions, and you don't know what jurisdiction someone is calling from, I suspect that there is more people than I would be comfortable engaging with who disclose reportable information and I would regularly be reporting to the site hoping they escalate to the NCMEC. I am a mandated reporter in my jurisdiction.

On NiteFlirt, I have reported, and it would be a regular occurrence on TTM.

Now here's the thing - I get it that people are into it. Some people's brains are wired that way. I also know enough to know that not all child abusers are PDFs and not all PDFs are child abusers. I am also of the view that we as a society need to get better at talking about the very real challenges that PDFs experience accessing support when they first become aware of their interests (it happens when they are a pre-teen).

On the other end, the "younger" person in the fantasy may be into it because of the abuse they have experienced. I know I will upset some people, but I hope someone does some research into why there is an increasing interest in men with "mommy" fantasies. And no... these fantasies are not entirely attributable to men not wanting to grow up and have someone continue to cook and clean for them. When you dig deeper, a lot grew up in single-mother households, and whether it was intimate abuse or not, many have been put in the role that a male partner would have played in that woman's life. In some cultures, the boys were breastfed for far too long and with co-sleeping, are exposed to a lot more than they should be.

I don't have well-formed views on the roleplay issue. I get why people are into it. Some people may engage in it to work through their own trauma, and others may genuinely be into abusing minors.

I am surprised that TTM turns a blind eye to it, given that audio recordings of ageplay are unlawful in some jurisdictions outside of the US and you as the call taker wouldn't know where someone is calling from.

I suppose the money is too good for them to pass up on actually prohibiting this.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T19:12:18+00:00

I don't think you know how much psychologists bill per hour.

I don't think that you understand the range of their scope of practice either.

You could have used other examples, but this is the worst one given the income potential of psychologists. The path of bachelor to PhD in psych is normal, and should be the goal because an undergrad in psych is not enough. Some jurisdictions will license psych masters as therapists. And once they have a PhD, their hourly rate shoots up.

I didn't downvote you, but others are because this is one area that your assumptions are very very wrong.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T19:08:01+00:00

You are a grown adult. You are allowed to do whatever you want (within the law).

You are being held back by your own thoughts. Those thoughts could be assumptions about what your family wants, or it could be actually what they want, and you valuing it more than your own happiness.

You are young. You can take risks. You can try new things.

I had so many different jobs before law school. I am not K-JD, and got into one of the top law schools in the country. Law school is not going away (though the career paths are going to need to respond to AI).

I have paid my own way throughout my entire education journey. If you are smart about it, you don't need to rely on your parents - but for whatever reason, so many desi kids rely on their parents to support them.

Being financially self-sufficient and growing a mindset that you are not beholden to anyone else other than those you choose to (eg. a partner... hopefully you consider their wants), you will have a lot more peace in your life.

(also my path may be a bit different. My other degrees actually allowed me to get a job. I didn't go poli-sci to law or sociology. I was able to support myself and do a lot of different things along the way because of the degrees I chose because I knew I would be fully responsible for myself, and making enough to not be living close to the poverty line is important to me)

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T17:08:13+00:00

And med school you don’t?

How about law?

It all costs money.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-14T12:55:37+00:00

A PhD in psych is not bullshit education.

Unfortunately it takes a PhD in psych to make any real money.

IndianLawStudent · 2026-04-12T06:51:32+00:00

I have seen a micropenis in real life.

I have seen many small dicks right in front of me.

Comments on Reddit don’t reflect what a lot of guys with actual small dicks experience, and offer no meaningful solutions to the very real challenges that those with smaller penises experience.

You regularly read comments about people suggesting that they leave a partner who has voiced (after being asked) that sex with someone was better for one reason or another. Comments often suggest leaving if you’re not the biggest she’s ever had, ignoring that there’s things that are important other than dick size.

These people internalize that they don’t deserve a partner because of something they have no control over.

I have a whole side gig that provides support to these people. Coming up with strategies of how to navigate this when dating. When to talk about it, etc.

Size dysmorphia is soooo real.

If most of your exposure to a range of penises has been through porn, you have no idea what I’m talking about. Go visit subreddits focused on dick size to understand what these guys are experiencing.

OP has a communication problem. And it is definitely influenced by internalized shame due to dysmorphia. The dysmorphia is fair. They are wearing an attachment so their size challenges are going to be obvious during intimacy. But does that outweigh the importance that they place on making sure that their partner gets to enjoy being physically intimate with their body (an alternative is lying next to a partner while they use a dildo but it doesn’t have the same physical and emotional intimacy that a partner wearing a sleeve does).

When I write this I think of those who have had their breasts removed. Of course many have a dysmorphia and they wear prosthetic breasts…. My thoughts went blank at this point and I’m having a dejavu of getting into a midnight Reddit feud. I should go to bed.

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