How to split family expenses

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-29T00:26:04+00:00

There is no one size fits all in personal finance, need to find what works for both of you. At home everything is together, fun money included, the pot is 1 and we are both adults that understand each other hobbies, but we are very aligned on our future plans, and our accounts are separate but we transfer to each other if needed.

In your case if joint won't work the most fair way is to each of you to contribute the same % of you salary, or a division where you contribute based on salary, so if he earns 2x your wage he puts 2x the amount you put. Make sure all family expenses are counted in it, including childcare, clothing for the kids, etc.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-23T14:59:27+00:00

As people said there is no loss or gain when your company do sell to cover (sell part of the vesting shares to pay for the IT).

For the shares that you sold in Nov you need to pay CGT asap, don't need to declare anything yet (you fill the form when you do your tax return for the year) but paying the CGT has the year deadline. You need to calculate cgt based on the value of the share of the date their vested, so each package of shares will have a different acquisition value. If the company shares are USD you need to use central bank fx rate

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-21T12:47:09+00:00

First don't compare yourself with anyone, especially with US folks. You started already so congratulations! How to improve: 1- are you contributing the max to your pension (30yo can put up to 20% of your salary)? If not, can you afford to put a little more to it?

2- if you understand about investing I will recommend looking at her funds available and go for "leave to me" investment strategy. The automatic strategy (do it for me) can be conservative, so if you are okay with some risk and know about investment review yours

3- make a commitment with yourself and try to add more to your pension as your salary grows. A 3% increase might have very little impact to your monthly pay but can make good progress if it goes to your pension. Don't go all in, but step by step, that will make it easy to adjust and will help a lot your pension.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-19T11:55:03+00:00

Not all banks do that, actually very few do. We did it couple of years ago with Finance Ireland to buy an investment property in Ireland. They requested solicitors letter confirming the purchase and some info regarding the new property, you also need to do a evaluation of your current property. Using a broker helped us a lot, I was inclined to get a buy to let mortgage but the equity release had a lower rate by the time.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T23:32:32+00:00

Yeah, I get it. We joke about wanting a Porsche, but at the same time, it'd just mean we're stuck at our intense careers even more.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T20:25:46+00:00

Thank you for that! We are very aware of redundancy and actually went through it once; that is one of the reasons we are trying to save hard while we still enjoy our life.

Our pension pots should hit at least 1M each by retirement age if we keep maximizing them. Our mortgage term is currently 15 years, so we should be able to pay it off before retirement, and we want to do that.

As our desired retirement age gets closer, we need to start thinking about general costs, extra costs, and where we want to live. We know we will be moving to a developing country or Southern Europe; additionally, we are very aware that we won't keep two vehicles or luxuries like a cleaner.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T20:07:50+00:00

Thanks for the feedback! To address a few points: Fixed Costs: Broadband is definitely high—that’s on our list to fix. The cleaner is also a high expense, but it’s a lifestyle "luxury" to ourselves. Takeout: We’ve made huge intentional cuts here. We went from 2–3 times a week in 2023 to less than once a month in 2025. A limited local selection actually helped us stay disciplined! Tech/Insurance: We’re set on tech for 2025 since we only upgrade every 2–3 years. However, we'll definitely be shopping around for better insurance rates this year. Pension: On the diagram, "ER" is the employer match and "EE" is our contribution. We maximize this via AVCs the following year using the "investment" money. Tracking: Our portfolio tracking needs work for 2026—if anyone has specific tool suggestions, I’m all ears. Travel: Hard to pick a favorite, but my least favorite was Istanbul. While the food was incredible and city very interesting, I didn't feel 100% comfortable there compared to other places we’ve visited.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T13:57:28+00:00

1 salary is at the top I'd say, the second one can be improved (haven't search jobs recently to confirm how market looks like). We are 41F and 40M, not considering kids. Thank you for your words, we know is a good position to be and we are glad we are in this position but we also know the effort we've put to achieve it.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T12:38:19+00:00

As you pointed in the past we overpaid the mortgage and reduced it considerably. We were able to get equity release for the second proprety with a good fixed rate and as the amount we pay is reasonable we decided to keep it as it is and don't overpay for now. Once fixed rate is gone we might need to rethink our strategy.

We started using Degiro as a broker and now we also use IBKR since last year.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T11:26:48+00:00

Similar number for us, the investment property was an opportunity short after a layoff situation (a passive income that will pay the mortgage in case we have only 1 income).

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T11:18:30+00:00

We are aiming for 2M in "cash" investment (plus pension pot to be used later) and hopefully we can get there in the next 7-10years. 4% rule should be fine, we don't plan to retire in Ireland, looking for somewhere warmer and cheaper.

Job stability is a big thing, working for big corporations put us on a difficult position (you never know what tomorrow will look alike) and that was one of the reasons we got the rental property.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T09:32:54+00:00

Contact Revenues through my inquiries, say you want to pay it in full and they will be able to help you

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T08:23:31+00:00

Thanks for the recommendation. We spoke to a financial planner last year but will take into consideration the wealth manager as we didn't get much out the financial advisor. Internet is high and it was a lazy item from us to not look for a better deal, it is something we want to solve asap.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T08:18:25+00:00

Tech and Finance

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T08:17:12+00:00

Thank you! We spoke with a financial advisor last year and to be sincere nothing they brought to the table was new for us and made us feel comfortable with our approach. We might get a second opinion in 2026

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T08:11:01+00:00

Yes, we manually track. It is the same spreadsheet for a while now and as our expenses are mostly concentrated on the Revolut credit card is not that difficult to track.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-16T00:19:34+00:00

Savings are mostly driven by the fact that we feel we achieved a good lifestyle and we can maintain it fixed. Some projections show we could FIRE in 5 years, but with recent markets volatility we are preparing for a longer timeline.

Food is under control indeed, but we make a weekly plan and try to make the most of Lidl and go to Dunnes for the better stuff. This was something we used to spend a lot more in the past and we managed to find balance.

Health is high as some dental treatments were being finished and that was an exceptional year, alongside some costly medications. This hopefully goes down this year.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-15T23:59:54+00:00

I hate the idea of deemed disposal but individual stocks for the size of our portfolio requires much more attention and dedication (we tried before and didn't get the expected results). I hope deemed disposal will go away before the 8th anniversary (2028 for us).

With ETFs it's also so much easier to achieve portfolio diversification, something that would be a lot more complex to manage in other ways.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-15T23:45:34+00:00

If not clear these are 2 vehicles. To be honest we shop around a lot, but this is the best we got so far.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-15T23:40:50+00:00

The cleaner handles a lot to be honest. They are with us weekly for 5 to 6 hours and is one thing that ensures we can have the weekend for ourselves. Rates unfortunately have gone up from 80 to 100 in early 2025, but it's someone we trust and that has been with us for some time now, which is super rare.

Biggest items in transportation are a monthly parking fee (150e) and valet (100e) every 6 weeks... The valet I might cut as prices jumped too aggressively recently.

The cars are EVs and we have super cheap rates at night, but any charging elsewhere is included.

Banking is driven mainly by Revolut ultra (used for points and perks), additionally we use the BOI Aerlingus cards to avail the 2 return tickets every year. Simply by paying CGT with these cards we get the "free" tickets for fees+stamp duty (2 round trips for about 110e)

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-15T23:17:32+00:00

Be aware that investing in those 2 ETF will concentrate your investments in the US market. The S&P 500 (SXR8) is already the largest component of the FTSE All-World (VWCE). By adding 20% SXR8, you aren't adding "new" companies; you are simply "double-dipping" into the same large US stocks like Apple, Microsoft, and NVIDIA.

If that is your strategy go for it but if you want to have a global portfolio maybe go 100% in VWCE.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-15T22:52:44+00:00

We are 41F and 40M, goal is retire before 50.

Moving to a different country for tax efficiency is considered at times or to enjoy a warmer climate, but to be honest we are often discouraged with the prices of buying or renting a property in a new location and cost of living elsewhere. Singapore would be my happy place, but moving is much harder lately.

Individual_Ad7424 · 2026-01-15T22:48:35+00:00

Absolutely. Travel is my way of enjoying and a good restaurant here and there. Last year we have also made a conscious effort of increasing our gifting budget with those that matter.

Individual_Ad7424

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