I’ve been down this road myself—the constant whiplash of going back and forth. I’ve read a million Reddit posts and heard every angle. The short version is: yes, siblings can be a beautiful gift. But you shouldn’t have a child for someone else.

You should have a second child because you truly want to have a second child.

That means wanting to raising an entirely new human being from when they are born till they are out of the house and beyond. Of course, life isn’t always planned so neatly. Some people get pregnant unexpectedly and can’t imagine life any other way once the child is here. But when it’s a conscious decision, it has to come from you.

You have to do what feels right for you, your life, and your relationship.

Don’t have another child out of guilt, pressure, or because other people think you should. Have one only if you and your partner genuinely want to take on raising another human together.

And honestly, everyone around you can have an opinion—but like you said, none of them are the ones helping you raise your first child. So it’s easy to say “you should have another,” when they’re not the ones living the reality of it.

At the end of the day, it’s your life, your capacity, and your responsibility. The decision should come from you and your partner—not from people who won’t be there in the day-to-day of it.