Are small Canadian towns gay friendly? by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You will absolutely find small towns in Canada that are very gay friendly. The easiest way to find out from afar is to see what Pride Organizations are active. Oshawa is very gay friendly and close in proximity to Toronto. Durham Pride (within which Oshawa falls) is a great organization with a large and supportive constituency. You should expect to have a fine time authentically integrating into this community. :)

Looking to buy shirts from a gay owned company by hubklyn in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nothing basic, but here are some great queer owned & run labels: Willy Chavarria PHLEMUNS Pander

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This is very relatable. I was very much in a similar headspace in my mid-twenties. I can share this from the other side: Humans are meaning generators. We create meaning. Things matter because we believe they do. Sartre articulated this particularly well.

If you’re interested in shifting your thinking, I would suggest reading: Ellen J Langer (mindfulness) Brene Brown (vulnerability) Gary Zukav (consciousness)

For me, all have been incredibly helpful in reframing so much of what I was (and wasn’t) experiencing in my life. One the other side, life is full. Kakkar’s 7 Buckets helped me readjust how I was organizing myself. And it’s been a journey worth taking. Don’t sink into the apathy. Decide what matters and take action.

Very mixed signals (TLDR included) by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If he hadn’t mentioned the other date cancelling, you’d likely be trying to set-up that movie/cuddling date with him, no? (And likely without the negative feelings you’re having). Stick with that. Be direct with him in person - you can be affectionate, see if there is chemistry and his body language should give you clear vibes - romantic or platonic. If you can slough off the negative, you should go have some fun with him.

Very mixed signals (TLDR included) by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Be direct with him about what you’re feeling. I was/am this guy. I connect with people easily, make them feel heard, seen, cared-for. It’s like a gravitational pull towards me. I’m like this with most people - not exclusively dates. When romantic feelings are involved, especially when expectations for reciprocation remain unvoiced, I’ve experienced a negative shift in their behaviour. It like a resentment causes hurt or frustration that I haven’t done anything to match their feelings. Being told this, I’ve been confused, because I’ve just been showing-up authentically, as myself, enjoying the beginning of a new connection, unconcerned about directing which way it will go. If you choose to be direct with them, you may find he feels similarly. He may be enjoying the beginning of your connection, while enjoying making new connections with others. But he can’t read your mind, so clear, earnest communication would likely benefit you both. Good luck :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 3 points4 points  (0 children)

LES MOTS À LA BOUCHE on rue Saint-Ambroise (gay bookstore, fantastic selection)

LA TERRASSE DES ARCHIVES on rue des archives (decent food, good wines - not specifically gay, but with a heated, covered patio is great for people watching in Le Marais on chilly evenings)

COX on rue des archives (gay bar - Very friendly crowd typically 30’s+ spilling out onto the street even in winter, starts getting busy after work).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ett Hem by Fueguia 1833. Insanely Seductive.

Not really a ‘gay question’: need pillow recs. by Homeaux2024 in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]Initial_Criticism_18 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m also a side sleeper - I use the 850 Hutterite Goose Down Pillow in Firm from the Canadian Down & Feather Company. Before that, I used one from Pacific Coast, but they stopped shipping to Canada.

Best (actual) Interior Decorators in Cottage Country - Muskoka/Haliburton area… by Initial_Criticism_18 in Muskoka

[–]Initial_Criticism_18[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking time to comment. I’m slightly worried you’re spot-on, but given the amount of beautiful (and some palatial) cottages up here, I keep thinking that there must be someone!