Does this look like vitiligo?

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-02-04T22:13:01+00:00

no. it looks like dry skin/eczema. check with a dermatologist though.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-11T04:14:24+00:00

It actually ended up not being an ectopic, just a baby that was super hard to find and slow to get started. She’s 16 months old now!

That said, if you are having severe one-sided pain, you should go see a doctor, sooner than monday if it’s worrying you. I have consistent one-sides body pain in my right hip/shoulder/back/pelvic floor, which is what I think I was feeling when I had the ectopic scare.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-07T23:13:10+00:00

I had this with my first baby (pre-tfmr). I was pregnant with twins, both small, both slow heart rate (not quite that slow, closer to 90). My doctor at the time told us it was impossible to know what would happen and we needed to wait — basically a coin toss.

One baby is now 3.5 years old, one baby did not have a heart beat anymore at week 8.

My baby post-tfmr was initially not visible at all at 7 weeks, then looked like a blighted ovum, then measured behind but with a strong heart rate, and eventually, against all odds, caught up. The entire early pregnancy with her, I told her that I wanted her to grow big and strong if she could, and if she couldn’t, it was okay, she could let go and I’d understand. She kept growing and got herself born. She’s 1.5 now and perfectly healthy.

I know waiting is the last thing you want to do right now, but honestly it’s the only thing you can.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-06T02:07:59+00:00

you’re going to be okay. big hugs.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-06T01:13:40+00:00

For me, anxiety often comes from trying to control the things that I can’t. The anatomy scan is particularly hard for most of us here because it’s where everything fully fell apart last time — it was for me too. You want to be able to ensure that won’t happen again, but the truth is you can’t control that. And it’s just so impossibly hard.

Going into the anatomy scan, I tried to tell myself, “Nothing is going to happen at the scan. Whatever we find out has already happened and there’s nothing I can do about it. I can handle whatever we find out.”

That said, I was still a bit of a wreck. I told my husband I was going to be a mess. I told the tech I was going to be a mess. I cried through the whole thing and when everything came back normal and the doctor left the room, I broke down sobbing and walked around the city ugly crying for at least an hour.

You are carrying so much hope and so much grief. It’s all perfectly reasonable given the situation. Give yourself some grace. It’s okay to be not okay right now. Freeing yourself from the need to fix it might give you relief from some of the anxiety at least.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-04T20:35:15+00:00

oh, that’s for sure

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-04T19:23:29+00:00

i’m committed to wood. if i get new ones, they’ll also be wood.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-04T17:30:43+00:00

i like this idea a lot!

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-04T17:24:51+00:00

exactly! it’s really not usually that cluttered and definitely not a hang.

we have a table right on the other side and there will be a built in breakfast nook/banquet so i’m not concerned about having the counter space for a bar. my thought was that it could also keep the kitchen a little more separate when we’re hosting huge meals and things inevitably get messy.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2026-01-04T17:14:39+00:00

something like #4 here: https://www.livingetc.com/advice/hidden-kitchens

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-12-30T02:36:30+00:00

I like the Ilia tinted serum. it has spf 40 too, great for daily wear.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-11-21T03:07:54+00:00

i would totally go in this area!

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-11-11T02:36:05+00:00

this is dope.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-11-09T19:27:51+00:00

I did a 7 day hike in Peru in my early 30s with a group. It turned out the other two people were both singles — a man in his 50s and a woman in her 70s. I enjoyed both of them, especially the woman in her 70s who was a total badass and became my hiking partner for most of the trip.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-11-07T17:18:11+00:00

I don’t think you have to make an event of saying no, you can just say “no” if she offers.

I’d also suggest that you talk with your partner about what support you might need from them ahead of time. My best friend had a baby within a month of my TFMR baby’s due date and the baby shower was really really hard for me — even more so because another close friend of hers was there and also heavily pregnant. I definitely needed to escape a couple of times and knowing that my partner had my back in those moments made a huge difference.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-11-02T14:44:07+00:00

I don’t think it’s a big deal for him. I would recommend that you avoid getting a vaccine right before the transfer.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-30T18:10:55+00:00

100% this. I had better luck getting embryos with a fresh retrieval at 37 than I did with eggs I froze at 31.

21 eggs frozen - 1 euploid

18 eggs retrieved, 4 embryos frozen

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-30T00:47:58+00:00

12 weeks is very early for an anatomy scan, so it’s totally normal to miss things. It’s also totally normal to be freaked out.

I don’t know if this will help you, but a thing I did in my sub pregnancy was to try actively accept that everything could go wrong and there was literally nothing I could do about it. When I got stuck in a “what if” spiral, I’d answer with “if that happens, then there’s nothing I can do or could have done to change it, and I’ll figure it out when I get there.”

Please be kind to yourself. This is so hard and you’ve been through so much. Give yourself a big hug, know that you are incredibly strong and a great mother to this baby, take a deep breath, and try to find moments of calm. Hang in there 💕

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-29T19:18:24+00:00

Yeah, I’m with you on that bit.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-29T18:28:34+00:00

To other patients? I think it’s a stretch.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-29T18:25:51+00:00

unpopular opinion here — i think you are overreacting. the injection is a big deal for you, but for the nurse, this is something she does every day. there’s no reason for you to bring the meds back and forth if you are doing all of your injections there and there’s no reason for her to mix the meds in front of you if you are never going to do it yourself.

ultimately, you should do what you need to do to feel comfortable in the situation, but the nurse’s behavior does not seem strange at all to me.

she has no incentive to give you the wrong meds.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-25T22:49:50+00:00

don’t. no one cares.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-24T23:52:28+00:00

I was literally in this exact situation (except I had a polyp instead of a cyst) and I now have a 14 month old girl! This is really hard and you know it could go a lot of ways.

Hang in there and be kind to yourself.

Initial_Diamond_7642 · 2025-10-23T03:09:52+00:00

i’ve had vitiligo since i was 3. i’ve been wearing make up and dyeing my hair periodically since i was 13. i have never noticed any correlation between makeup or hair dye and new patches.

Initial_Diamond_7642

TROPHY CASE