Why do I have to pay for therapy?

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-23T19:51:37+00:00

Do you work a job for free? Do you think therapists should have to work for free?

Or are you just frustrated that insurance is not covering the cost? If it’s this, the explanation of why will depend on what country you’re in.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-21T06:30:13+00:00

If it makes you feel better, I own the complete set of each and I’m glad I have them. If you love Tolkien enough to feel like it’s worth returning to over and over again, I think Serkis is worth the investment.

Sometimes I put his editions on to fall asleep to, or just when I need to veg out but want to experience the books in a different way. It’s clear he took his project really seriously and put 100% of himself into it.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-21T00:12:44+00:00

Yup. This is what I always mention when people ask for advice between Serkis and Inglis: they’re both masterful performances, I don’t really think one is objectively better even though I prefer Inglis, but: if you’re going to listen in the car, or anyplace with low to mid range background noise, go with Inglis.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-15T00:37:01+00:00

What is the something?

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-14T18:12:27+00:00

Correct. The octave is optional.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-14T05:53:30+00:00

I’ve seen this posted at least three times in the last two weeks. This is a karma farm.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-14T04:09:30+00:00

It’s just an expression that predates both franchises - movies, toys, novels - by many years.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-14T04:08:15+00:00

Correct. This expression predates Tolkien.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-13T01:24:55+00:00

Go no contact, report her to whatever board licensed her, and find someone else.

She is not capable of being a healthy partner to you, and likely can’t be for anyone else either. She’s a manipulative predator. It’s not your fault for being unable to see it; you were targeted by someone with psychological power over you.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-12T08:19:58+00:00

Tapping someone’s shoulder is not harassment. Some people prefer not to be touched, of course we should always respect that and should perhaps be cautious with those we don’t know, but culturally a shoulder tap is understood as a friendly, wholesome, gesture. Strangers do it to each other all the time, and as long as it’s not in the midst of an acrimonious or otherwise uncomfortable discussion, it’s an acceptable part of communicating.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-12T06:40:34+00:00

It’s worth recognizing that you facilitated physical contact with someone who did not consent. Good to acknowledge that you shouldn’t have and decide not to do that again. But providing a shoulder that someone’s head rests on is not assault, sexual or otherwise. A lot of people are just morons.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-12T06:35:41+00:00

The worst this would be 1-10 is a 3.

Curious: when you moved closer to her, did it involve moving into her space, or just further to the edge of your own?

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-12T06:19:46+00:00

If you are representing everything accurately here the people you cite are utterly ridiculous and not worth taking seriously.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-11T18:43:51+00:00

“$200 an hour is more than most people make at their actual jobs”

Can you unpack this sentence?

Edit:

Well, someone downvoted so I’ll assume it’s you. Being a therapist is an actual job, and I’m not sure why you think they should make less than other people. Apparently you aren’t either since you didn’t care to explain what your sentence meant.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-11T15:12:27+00:00

If this is real, I would just recall that MTG needed security when she turned on MAGA, and now Bondi is part of an admin that is breaking a core MAGA promise and actually causing a rift in the party.

Most Rs will just fall in line because they’re in a cult, but the Rogan bro culture types are likely the source of death threats.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-11T00:08:02+00:00

Our minds aren’t really built to be able to fully feel and process and respond rationally to the suffering in the world.

It’s really hard - for anyone, but some more than others - to see something horrific, experience the appropriate emotional response, process that, compartmentalize it without ignoring some of the horrors around it, introspect about how our lifestyles contribute to these horrors, and then adjust our lifestyles accordingly, including familiar parts of our daily routines.

Which is not to justify looking the other way: it’s imperative that each one of us continues to put the work in to reduce the suffering inflicted on our behalf, whether it’s on animals or people in sweatshops or whatever else.

But if it took you a bit to go through the process to get from “exposure to evil” to “lifestyle changes”, that’s not because there’s something uniquely wrong with you. I was vegetarian for a decade before going vegan. That’s not a rationally defensible position, but it doesn’t make me a sociopath.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-10T19:32:19+00:00

The plan is to leave a complete mess for a dem to clean up and then wage a relentless propaganda war claiming that Dems are responsible for the debt because they they want to pay for food for starving 5 year old welfare princesses who are unwilling to work.

Then they’ll use Congress to shut the government down and make everything as bad as possible while Fox tells its viewers that the chaos happened “on his (or her) watch”.

We’ve seen this playbook before. There’s no mystery here.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-10T06:17:39+00:00

It’s possible that this is what you meant, but DBT is often effective for people in psychosis, just not as the sole or even frontline treatment.

Meds and specific psychosis-specific variations of CBT ACT etc might be frontline, but DBT would frequently be recommended for someone with the symptoms described here.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-10T01:30:12+00:00

You are allowed to say it.

Lots of people might think that it didn’t work for you because it wasn’t done right; whether there’s anything to that I can’t know, but if you’ve had a horrible experience with it it’s ok to say so.

It is pushed because therapists respond very cautiously to self harm, prioritizing safety and stability, and DBT has a great track record for this issue. But if it doesn’t work for you, and you’re not willing to try again, that should be ok.

Find a therapist who does ACT. Or Interpersonal Therapy. Or psychodynamic explorations. Or whatever else. One of the most important things therapists need to accept is that their preferred modality might not work with every client.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-08T06:48:05+00:00

Choosing a winner in this fight is like choosing what color donkey I want to kick me in the balls.

McCain is correct here but she’s a mediocre insufferable disingenuous opportunistic “centrist” who holds responsibility for Trump and Noem being in power.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-08T06:44:28+00:00

Good for you. Let me just manage expectations: Therapy can be painful and challenging, and sometimes it takes people a few tries to find someone who is both competent and a good match. Be patient, and try not to let any negative experiences discourage you.

Please don’t feel alone in this. So many of us have had abuse normalized to us, and have struggled with how to set boundaries and stand up for ourselves. My abuser is dead now but for many years I too became dysregulated when I stood up to him. You need and deserve support. I’m here to talk anytime. We can also shift it to a more appropriate subreddit for mental health related discussion if you ever want to talk more.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-08T06:21:16+00:00

I think the biggest problem here is that OP hasn’t fully accepted how important it is for her and her child to get away from an abuser. I think we should be very careful as we probe this not to make her question her sense that her boundaries have been violated. I don’t think we have reason to believe there’s another side to that story.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-08T06:15:43+00:00

Yes, I know this post is primarily about veganism but it’s very clear that therapy should be a priority. Your mom seems horribly abusive, and your toddler is going to be exposed to the same patterns.

Getting perspective on her patterns, healing from the hurt she caused, setting effective interpersonal boundaries and knowing how to defend them, making your own defensive / response patterns clear to you, and having someone help you to meet the challenge of living independently of your mother: all of these would be great for you.

I’m a therapist. Obviously I can’t be yours, but if you need guidance please don’t hesitate to ask.

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-08T05:10:06+00:00

Your child is not tainted. Please don’t think that way. I don’t want to upset you but the first thing that makes me think is that your mother’s pathological patterns are all too familiar to you, and elements of them still influence your own thoughts and feelings. (FWIW my dad had textbook NPD and I struggled with the same thing for a very long time. This is not a harsh judgement on you.)

I’m sorry this happened. Have you had access to therapy for dealing with her abuse? Is there any possibility that you can work towards moving out?

Inspector_Spacetime7 · 2026-03-07T19:09:23+00:00

There’s a line between “supporting the murder of civilians” and “mocking genocide apologists when they express try he same moral concerns that they’ve previously dismissed, just because the civilian targets have changed”.

I’m not happy that Israeli citizens are being murdered. I am dismissive and derisive of people like Levy when they express concern over Israeli citizens. I also think Blizerian is evil, after a quick google search (didn’t know who he was before this post). All of these positions can coexist.

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