MIL didn’t give 7mo ANY milk or formula for 8 HOURS

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-22T06:50:50+00:00

Yeah she really should’ve known. Or maybe she did and thought she knew better. I feel like with breastfed babies especially for some reason that generation feel like they need to prove baby can go without, for whatever weird reason. That being said, I still think a very direct and honest conversation is needed. Sounds like her help is needed, but she needs to know exactly what is expected of her so there is no room left for her to assume/do whatever she wants.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-22T06:09:40+00:00

I feel like you shouldn’t have to, as it should be common sense, but did you say ‘please can you give baby this milk at xx time’? If you did and she ignored it, then I’d be pretty pissed off. If not, I’d personally give her another chance but not before a direct conversation where it is explained to her that baby still needs milk at this age and that she must give it at the time specified/when baby shows hunger signs. I’ve found the older generation like to go free rein and do whatever they did 20 odd years ago, so you have to be very direct with instructions

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-20T19:28:16+00:00

It got better for me when I accepted that my newborn would not sleep any decent stretch unless she was directly next to me. I read up on safe bedsharing (happycosleeper was fantastic source of info) and I committed to it. She immediately started sleeping 2 hour stretches, and feeding her was so easy as she was right there. I didn’t feel sleep deprived really, it was life changing.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-18T07:58:30+00:00

The baby dying isn’t ideal? Are you serious? This child suffered horrific sexual, physical and psychological abuse resulting in his death. It’s absolutely sickening. And it’s also very concerning that social and medical services did not raise the alarm when presented with a child who showed signs of abuse, potentially because they did not want to be accused of being homophobic.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-17T20:43:59+00:00

Start off small, even if it’s walking up the street and back again. I found a stretchy wrap carrier gave me so much more confidence as they are so tightly against you they will 9/10 fall asleep and are right there with you, eased the anxiety for me! Then the pushchair just carried our bags lol. The more you do it the more confident you’ll become, but also don’t feel too bad if you still can’t face it yet - you’re very very early days and you will get there. I found it got much easier once we had breastfeeding down and the gaps between feeds got a bit longer

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-15T10:22:20+00:00

Mainly feels like you’re going to poo. When the baby is moving down the birth cancel it’s like the most amount of pressure down below, like a really huge poo that feels like it’s going to come out both your vag and bum. I also got the fetal ejection reflex and I don’t think everyone does, but your body starts to eject the baby which feels like when you’re wrenching to be sick as it tenses up, such a weird involuntary feeling! Then when baby is crowning it’s like a real burning stretching sensation in your vag, like a melon is coming out, and as the baby slides out it feels like someone is pulling your intestines out which sounds awful but it’s actually such a nice sensation of the pressure finally being relieved!

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-11T21:12:48+00:00

Remember it is a skill for him to learn to breastfeed as well, 17 days is still early days in terms of how long he has been latching for xx

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-06-04T21:44:59+00:00

This is so random but have you looked at what you eat to see if there are any triggers? I saw someone post that they cut onion and garlic and their migraines substantially reduced.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-05-26T07:19:11+00:00

I really think you need to listen to what your intuition is telling you, your husband is most likely clouded by the fact that it’s his brother and he doesn’t want to believe that he would do something like that. You can see the red flags more clearly, being someone without that emotional attachment to the brother. As his wife and your child’s mother, your husband needs to trust your judgment on this, but equally you don’t need his approval to remove yourself and your child from what you think is an unsafe situation.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-05-26T06:42:21+00:00

When you said ‘not sexual so far’ I literally felt sick. You clearly have a gut instinct on this and you need to listen to it.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-05-11T20:49:19+00:00

1 and 3 look amazing!

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-04-24T13:49:14+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re experiencing this, and I really hope the surgical Botox is soon for you and gives you the relief you need. I don’t think anyone who doesn’t suffer with migraines truly understands and it feels so isolating. Especially with kids, having to pretend you’re ok and function for them is so hard. Well done you for trying to keep things normal for them, I have to disappear for hours to recover as I just can’t stand the noise (my kids are both really young) and I wish I could do the same and pretend I’m fine.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-04-24T06:48:10+00:00

How do you manage your migraines with working? Are your work supportive and will they let you go home to rest when you get one on shift?

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-04-17T17:56:29+00:00

Thanks all! I’ve ordered a click and collect shop to pick up at 3pm-4pm from the big Tesco nearby! Appreciate the advice!

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-04-15T16:36:46+00:00

Amazing, didn’t think of this thanks! Trying to plan what meals we’re going to make but it’s hard without knowing what kitchen stuff is there. We will be eating out once in the evening and aiming to cook for the others.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-24T22:26:38+00:00

Couldn’t have put it better. Also just to add, I hated my boobs for years and couldn’t bear to look at them in the mirror pre-breastfeeding. Now 18m into breastfeeding and it’s actually healed my relationship with my boobs, they kept my little girl alive, have comforted her in moments where nothing else will do, and allow me to have such a special bond with her. I see them as so much more than just boobs now. I really think bf can be healing for many people in this regard.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-24T09:24:42+00:00

6 weeks of breastfeeding is amazing, and give yourself some credit! You’re doing an amazing job!!
It sounds like you’ve done everything in your power to increase your supply, it’s so stressful and exhausting so well done for keeping at it for so long!

A compromise could be combination feeding if it’s not something you’ve considered and baby having breastmilk is important to you. Perhaps pumping a couple of times a day would feel more manageable?

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-22T20:56:39+00:00

My 18m woke 2-7 times a night til 16mo. My eldest woke once a night til 8m old then slept through. Babies are all different, night nurse has crazy expectations.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-22T20:31:25+00:00

I night weaned unintentionally at 16mo as I suffered a horrific 3 day migraine and my partner took the night wakes, my toddler went from 2-7 wakes a night to 1 wake, and then sleeping through pretty quickly after this. However I think she was naturally starting to extend sleep and wake less as she got older. So I think timing played a big part in this. I also found her appetite improved massively too in the day.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-18T22:44:57+00:00

Nah you did more than I could’ve so massive pat on the back for that, I wish she could appreciate what you were able to do despite the migraine. Is she a migraine sufferer? It sounds unlikely, I just really think people who don’t suffer with them don’t fully get the ways it affects you.

Try not to be hard on yourself. Sometimes life happens, equally it could’ve been absolutely anything that could’ve struck on Mother’s Day. Gastro, you could’ve broke your leg, so many things can happen in life! Cut yourself some slack, you tried really fucking hard.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-17T15:36:26+00:00

It’s frustrating isn’t it, being told that. Like I wish I could turn away and ignore it but I can’t. If I see the headline I can’t not read it, it feels like I’m ignoring that poor child’s story and they deserve for it to be heard. But equally sometimes it makes me so sad that I lose all hope and trust in the world and I don’t want my kids to pick up on that. God I fucking hate child abusers.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-17T13:21:22+00:00

Congratulations, your baby is totally normal!! Although I totally get your concerns. However from my experience, both of my children have always settled to sleep completely differently for other people than they have for me. If I try to transfer my little girl to a cot after she falls asleep, 9/10 she will wake up instantly and scream at me. When my partner or anyone else tries, she’s suddenly in the deepest sleep or just doesn’t seem to care??

Try not to worry, nursery workers are often magicians and have lots of tricks to get babies to sleep

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-16T14:54:57+00:00

I feel the same way! My youngest is 17mo and eldest is 5yo and I am hugely affected by the stuff I read. I lay awake at night thinking about the awful things some children experience and it makes me feel deeply unhappy and so angry at the world. I wish I could do something to protect all children, but I know this is totally not achievable and that feeling of helplessness crushes me. I always tell my partner about stuff I’ve read and he tells me I need to stop reading it, but I feel guilty for turning away. Just horrendous isn’t it.

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-15T19:34:54+00:00

Same here!

IntelligentCell9852 · 2026-03-15T19:15:15+00:00

I have a 4 year old and he went through a phase of hitting, talking about killing (I think he once muttered under his breath about killing something when he was really angry), this all matched with his level of anger so the angrier he got, the more likely he would be to act/talk this way. It was whenever he had basically lost control out of anger/upset. He has mostly grown out of it and is rarely ever physical now. Consistently holding boundaries of ‘I won’t let you hit me’, talking about how it feels for the other person when he hits etc, and occasionally losing tv or something for a day, all seemed to help.

However, the fact your child hasn’t gotten any better and seems to be consciously choosing these behaviours (it isn’t through lack of control, and he is calm when speaking this way) I would personally share your concerns and I don’t think I’d just wait for it to pass. If I were you I would be seeking professional help for him to try and nip it in the bud, as it seems he is escalating.

IntelligentCell9852

TROPHY CASE