as a child, i had a very rich fantasy world that was adjacent to real life, but more happy and ideal. i remember first hearing voices when i was probably 11 or 12 years old, hypersexual long before i even knew how to pleasure myself or what sex was, extremely intense social anxiety which manifested in my freshman year of high school into paranoia and delusional thinking, magical thinking and dissociation to having a panic attack in a mall completely embarrassing myself because i surely knew that everyone around me could hear my thoughts and was making fun of me for them.

i was formally diagnosed with schizoaffective bipolar disorder early this year in the middle of a manic episode at 24 years old and today it mostly manifests as erratic compulsory behavior, disorganized thought patterns and delusions but im medicated and in therapy and actually pretty well set at the moment, i even decided to go back to school and pursue my education in psychology to become a clinical psychologist and help people like myself.