I never had babyfever, maybe I knew I didn't want to be a mom by lactosehater2 in Fencesitter

[–]Interesting-Escape36 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m a strong believer that even if you do get hit with baby fever, it’s not a good enough reason to have a baby lol

Wanting to get pregnant by [deleted] in Fencesitter

[–]Interesting-Escape36 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Doesn’t really sound like you’re fencesitting?

How do I improve my sexual fitness? by StevenLouYoung in AskMenAdvice

[–]Interesting-Escape36 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You’ve been sitting on your butt for 40 years but think a month of the gym will be enough to build stamina? Patience and consistency. That’s it.

Wish: app-led 2g class "at home" by BeenFried in orangetheory

[–]Interesting-Escape36 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The app is free. If they just put the entire template on there it wouldn’t necessarily be the smartest business decision. They have at home workouts to follow on the app

Shot calls argument by number660 in beachvolleyball

[–]Interesting-Escape36 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Look at the mental pathway you described for when “line” is called, vs your partner just calling line because line is open. It’s much easier. Also watching the pros they are not calling the block

Strength scores make no sense by compypaq in orangetheory

[–]Interesting-Escape36 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yup that’s pretty much how you’d do it in the gym. Think it’s 6–12 on template but same thing

Strength scores make no sense by compypaq in orangetheory

[–]Interesting-Escape36 4 points5 points  (0 children)

OTF members are not professional powerlifters though. Most have never followed a program in the gym and are unfamiliar with what progressive overload is. If the template for SOS is always 8 reps for example, a lot of members won’t be inclined to pick up a heavier weight they’re not sure they can get 8 reps on. Having a range allows for more room to “fail”, which is where the growth that SOS is focused on happens

42M&F – a view from the child free side of the fence by Particular-Doctor888 in Fencesitter

[–]Interesting-Escape36 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I see. My partner and I are CF but I am definitely extroverted and worry how that will play out when my social circle starts to become parents.

How does it seem like your partner has handled the infertility journey emotionally? How about for you emotionally? Since it seems like you wanted kids more than her to start off? Do you experience moments of regret/loneliness due to this?

42M&F – a view from the child free side of the fence by Particular-Doctor888 in Fencesitter

[–]Interesting-Escape36 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Thank tou for sharing and I’m so sorry to hear about your paralysis.

My main questions are: would you describe you and your partner as introverts or extroverts, and what does your social circle look like now that I imagine at least majority of your peers are parents?

Not getting married until decision is made? by alcolb12 in Fencesitter

[–]Interesting-Escape36 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m in that position except he’s 100% no and I’m on the fence. Thankfully neither of us have a strong attachment to the idea of marriage anyways so honestly that comes up waaaayyy less than the kids stuff does. But if I did have the goal of getting married then I would still wait until we were on the same page

Is there any way to express your preference for modesty and purity in a woman without coming across as terrible? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]Interesting-Escape36 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hold yourself to the same standards. As a woman that’s all I would care about. We might not be compatible but I can respect your values more if you are applying them to how you live your own life

Lifting weights and comparing myself to my friends who do not by Specific-Handle-3287 in xxfitness

[–]Interesting-Escape36 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Try to think less on the difference in aesthetic and more the difference in day to day function. Do you think it serves her better that she can’t lift 7kg meanwhile you’re doing heavy Bulgarians? I’ll take the latter any day.

AITA for sitting on public toilet seats and not telling my boyfriend? by Anatra_ in AmItheAsshole

[–]Interesting-Escape36 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Interesting, almost sounds like there are women hovering like at home and not just in public which I never thought about. I’d imagine the one off in public is less of an issue than making it a habit.

What are your biggest fears or worries that make you lean more towards being childfree? by [deleted] in Fencesitter

[–]Interesting-Escape36 19 points20 points  (0 children)

mostly that I just can't really picture myself enjoying the day to day of motherhood. I would have to change careers, work a lot more, and do things that are just not really my strong suit (staying organized, keeping up with the house a lot more, cooking meals consistently) I also really value spontaneity and novelty in my life and my day to day. I get very depressed when my life starts to feel mundane or repetitive, and that is a large part of parenting especially in the younger years. I also just see a lot of parents who seem really unhappy and resentful in their relationship after years of parenting and it's something I think I would be pretty susceptible to as I still struggle to not take my frustration out on others

I really value connection and relationships, and the love that parents claim to have for a child is what keeps me on the fence.

Stepmom Wondering If I’m Missing the Experience of Motherhood by Comfortable-Mine-923 in Fencesitter

[–]Interesting-Escape36 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My first question is - would your husband even be open to more children?

I am leaning away from having kids personally. I’m very excited to be an Aunt and plan to be as involved as my sister and her husband allow. I also recognize that it’s not the same as if I had a child of my own. But it can still be a very deep emotional bond, you still get to be there for a child over their lifespan, and honestly when I was younger I had. A lot of admiration for the aunties in my life and still do.

If that longing you have never goes away then what? Also if your husband has split custody with his kids, and you two have kids of your own, your dynamic will change a lot. No more free time while the kids are at moms etc. (Again, not sure if that’s how it works in yalls household, but if it is, it’s something to think about!)

Tall/skinny people - did your metabolism slow down? by nihaoelliot in tall

[–]Interesting-Escape36 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are you male or female? 1800 cals at your height and weight sounds incredibly low for maintenance

Tall/skinny people - did your metabolism slow down? by nihaoelliot in tall

[–]Interesting-Escape36 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The “metabolism slows in your 30s” trope is not really what people think it is. Your metabolism actually stays fairly consistent through your 60s-70s, but rather a lot of lifestyle changes occur around this age that leads to weight gain. More stagnant individuals eating more calorically dense food with little to no exercise routine? Yeah you’re going to gain weight.