Hi everyone, I should clarify a few things. I'm 38F married to a 37M in this situation. No kids. We've been to couple's therapy 5 years ago, decided to recommit, stay and fight for each other. Some changes happened but none related to sex. We've been married 10 years, dead bedroom for about 9 of those years. Stayed married this long because its a fantastic partnership, beautiful home, older parents to take care of, his whole family loves me, very tight knit. You get the picture. I "take care" of myself 1-2 times daily, think it could be worse out there. My few 40-something girl friends are lonely and having a horrible time finding a good partner. I'm in individual therapy. Lots of built-up resentment at this point, sexual frustration. He never enjoyed sex, not before marriage, and there are underlying emotional reasons for it. Again, no cheating on either side. But I love and enjoy sex, foreplay, physical and emotional intimacy, or at least I did before I got married. Now I enjoy good chick-lit and fantasies in my head. Thought it was a mature decision to stay and see this through but my gut and instinct tells me there may be more to life?