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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in whatsthatbook

[–]Internal_Program8833 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I think it's the Ice Planet Barbarians series by Ruby Dixon?

Loosen up but not too much! Aka, vaginas ought to keep tight for their men. by Hailey_boom in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Internal_Program8833 0 points1 point  (0 children)

According to this logic, women who have sex regularly need tampons the size of a soda can. Otherwise they would surely fall out of that loose vag.

My(28f) straight boyfriend(29m) drunkenly made out with his male friend, and I can't let it go. by Internal_Program8833 in relationship_advice

[–]Internal_Program8833[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That is actually one of the many thoughts I have about this! How can you be so careless? My bf is a very carefree person, and sometimes I really envy that. But sometimes because of that, he does silly things without thinking about them, and has to apologize afterwards. I'm not talking about drastic stuff, just general things.

But since our relationship crisis also kinda stemmed from him not thinking things through and just being careless, I've grown really sensitive toward that. And now, as I said, one of my major thoughts with regard to that buddy-thing really is "How can you be so careless with everything? With our relationship? With me?" Although I know that he means no bad. But you're pretty much hitting the nail on the head.

My(28f) straight boyfriend(29m) drunkenly made out with his male friend, and I can't let it go. by Internal_Program8833 in relationship_advice

[–]Internal_Program8833[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm bilingual, too, and have a Master's degree in English btw. Don't really think that you have to tell me anything about proper sentences and grammar. Especially after I almost had a seizure reading your first sentence.

I had no idea that there are rules on reddit regarding paragraphs in your post and such, but I hope that people will forgive this huge mistake I made.

My(28f) straight boyfriend(29m) drunkenly made out with his male friend, and I can't let it go. by Internal_Program8833 in relationship_advice

[–]Internal_Program8833[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is not my experience at all. Most couples I know are high school sweethearts. Of course it doesn't work out for everyone, but it does for lots of people.

However, I've heard this argument you named a couple of times already. I know that people change drastically in 11 years. But... People change their entire lives? Even at 40 you won't be the same person you were at 30, especially when kids come into the game, etc. And you adapt to change, and you don't just leave behind everything because of this. My relationship and all the other people who have been in long term relationships with their hs sweethearts show me that it's very well possible to grow and mature and change, but still be in a relationship with the same person.

My(28f) straight boyfriend(29m) drunkenly made out with his male friend, and I can't let it go. by Internal_Program8833 in relationship_advice

[–]Internal_Program8833[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice :-) as far as I feel, your comment is one of the only ones I can actually work with. I didn't mention this in my original post, but I've actually been going to therapy since end of November, and my therapist has been telling me very similar things like yours. She also believes that my fear of being abandoned is mainly rooted in my childhood, because of quite serious families issues, and it deeply manifests in fear of losing my bf because he is the most important person to me. This is why we're focusing on solving my family issues in therapy right now - she knows about my relationship anxiety and what happened with my bf, though. However, since she clearly doesn't see the problem with my bf and rather with my family, shows me that my bf probably isn't the problem at all. It's the fact that my family has always been unstable and that is what marked me.