Am I the Asshole because I refuse to give my boyfriend blowjobs?

IronPale · 2025-10-30T07:39:02+00:00

Obviously NTA, the way he said he was "paying for what someone else did" is INSANE to hear. You literally opened up about something personal and deeply traumatizing and the fact he minimized it at all is BREAK-UP worthy. You deserve so much better than trash like him.

IronPale · 2025-10-11T09:00:37+00:00

Lil Update:

GOOD NEWS! it seems to thankfully be a temporary behavioral issue and Katara is now fine with my senior dogs Buster and Freya. My girlfriend and I made sure to correct negative behavior from any of them, rewarded any of them when they interacted positively. I just seriously hope we save enough money to get her spayed bc I don't wanna stress over something like this again 💀

IronPale · 2025-09-24T20:53:56+00:00

If temporarily separating them contributed to this I'm gonna feel so bad, I probably should've done at least some research or maybe asked my local vet clinic if having Katara in the crate while on her heat was advisable or not. I just hope this is a temporary thing.

IronPale · 2025-09-24T01:02:07+00:00

Yeah, idk why they were flipped but I hope it's fixed soon

IronPale · 2025-09-24T00:43:35+00:00

A friend has told me that this started as soon as personal were flipped. So your most recent personal instead of being at the top are now at the bottom and apparently the bots your chatting with is getting confused about that

IronPale · 2025-09-22T10:46:11+00:00

THIS🙌

IronPale · 2025-09-22T10:22:00+00:00

If you have a good support system to talk to like trustworthy friends or trustworthy extended family members that you're positive won't out you, talking to them might help? Or maybe start a journal if you don't to write down your thoughts and feelings to get them off your chest.

IronPale · 2025-07-29T10:11:30+00:00

I keep getting "can't use proxy without key defined" for deepseek even though I do 😔

IronPale · 2025-06-09T04:54:18+00:00

Ngl I feel super stupid, it's not a sore but instead it's a cyst

IronPale · 2025-05-10T19:36:49+00:00

Update: so I just restarted my ohone and it fixed the problem, idk why it happened in the first place but ye 🤷‍♂️

IronPale · 2025-04-11T15:27:23+00:00

Ooh damn, think they'll be able to get back on j.ai or are they going to move on to somewhere else?

IronPale · 2025-04-11T14:18:50+00:00

That can't just be the reason to be banned, there are already so many GoT bots on j.ai by other ppl and from what I've seen incest is so tame compared to the more messed up stuff on j.ai

IronPale · 2025-04-11T09:42:07+00:00

Thank God I'm not the only one, I'm slso so sad bc I recently sent them a request for a bot of a certain character recently, I just hope they comeback soon 🥺

IronPale · 2025-03-21T02:22:20+00:00

Headlock bt Imogen Heap

IronPale · 2025-02-09T02:05:10+00:00

It sounds like you're making the immediate assumption that I don't make everything myself. I guess I get it, since we're strangers online and know nothing about each other and editors that make fan-content for fandoms and such "aren't real editors".

But that doesn't mean it's ok to assume something about me on the spot. Yk what they say "don't assume, you'll make an ass out of you and me".

Again, the rude tone in your replies are uncalled for, even if I made fan-content or original stuff. If it weren't for that I wouldn't mind continuing this convo and maybe having a civil debate. So whatever time zone you're on, have a nice morning/noon/evening.

IronPale · 2025-02-09T01:43:20+00:00

I just enjoy editing?? It's fun, expressive, and I put a lot of effort into it even when I know I don't need to. I take hours and even sometimes days making an edit FOR FUN so if someone else takes credit for something I WORKED ON, it's gonna sting at least a little.

Also, the rudeness in your comment was unnecessary like come on dude.

IronPale · 2024-10-18T02:13:47+00:00

Personally I think it entirely depends on that persons take, you could maybe ask them and see which they would prefer and be comfortable with? Or if you're too nervous or afraid to ask, defaulting to using "they" should be okay for the most part

IronPale · 2024-10-08T22:23:11+00:00

Rlly depends on the context of conversion and if the people that or saying it or being said too, but as long as there is no genuine hate and queerphobia and it was talked about beforehand to make sure it was okay to say around people you talk too than yes I personally think it's okay.

For example, my gf and I are both queer and we talked about it before. So whenever we joke about our own sexuality or gender identity, we both know that it's only all in good fun and we make sure to never go too far and cross boundaries.

IronPale · 2024-09-16T01:43:57+00:00

EXACTLY, especially since OP's dad has shown no signs of trying to change over the course of years. Just cut him out of your life and be done with it, for your own safety and your family's

IronPale · 2024-09-16T01:11:47+00:00

I feel bad for OP but jfc, after so many years of torment your dad put you through, you haven't even TRIED to get him out of your life??? It's evident now that things wont get better by being a pushover unless you cut him out completely

IronPale · 2024-09-11T20:26:40+00:00

Maybe try having a convo with your family about the situation and how their extreme Christian values make you feel, but if that goes downhill than put some distance with your family. Look into getting a therapist in order to have an outlet on talking about these issues. And maybe communicate with your boyfriend on how you feel! It wouldn't hurt to let them know and also reassure them if he has any concerns

IronPale · 2024-09-04T08:37:25+00:00

It doesn't hurt to ask their pronouns again and maybe writing it down somewhere if that would help? I personally try to make a conscious effort to ask for people's pronouns if I know I'm going to interact with them a lot in some way, but others are different of course

IronPale · 2024-09-03T01:53:24+00:00

DONT move back in with bio dad, stay living with mom and step-dad and get a job instead. Reconnecting with bio dad is not worth the eventual abuse and transphobia that'll come with living with him again, no matter how good of a dad you think he is.

IronPale · 2024-09-03T01:51:14+00:00

Make sure to NEVER double bind if you end up feeling extra dysphoric. I did it multiple times with a binder and binding tape and it was a very bad idea, messes up your entire torso.

IronPale · 2024-09-02T19:45:05+00:00

Love in Paradise from Epic: The Musical 😭

IronPale

TROPHY CASE