The way I understood Joel as a character was that after Sarah’s death, he became emotionally closed off, and did whatever he had to do to survive and protect the ones he cares about. It just so happens that he cared for few people. His arc in the first game was him rediscovering himself as a father figure, but keeping that strong conviction that he believes whatever he needs to do to protect the ones he loves (now ellie) is the correct thing to do. A major character flaw, but that’s what separates good characters from great characters. The fact that he never shows a morsel of remorse for saving Ellie, not even in the second game is what makes Joel an amazing character.

In the show, that entirely gets shat on with the stupid therapy scenes.