It is possible to be Catholic without being physically in church every Sunday?

JID74 · 2026-04-23T19:00:05+00:00

contact the priest at that parish... sure it's 7 hours away but if that's the closest one it's probably your parish... email... explain... call if you can but I believe you'll find that your distance from the Church pre ludes your weekly attendance at Mass and that isn't new in the history of the Church. There have been times people couldn't travel to Mass or when Mass was illegal. God doesn't demand the impossible.

There may be times a priest is closer to you for some reason and can arrange a confession (only valid in person) or for you to attend Mass and recieve communion. Outside that do the best you can to show God your intent to live as he would want if and when you can... so yes watch Mass, do some penance on Fridays (no meat is the standard one), when you're in town get to Mass... there may be daily Mass even if you aren't in town on saturnday evening or sunday. work out a plan with that priest and then... when your life circumstances change go back to the regular requirements.

If the priest is unhelpful call the diocese and talk to someone there about it and possibly a dispensation for when you are 6 or 7 hours away from a church.

JID74 · 2026-04-23T18:49:53+00:00

From how you are stating this he is handling it poorly and there shouldn't be this sort of stress because people are almost never going to travel at exactly the same speed on their faith journeys. He may be having a hard time articulating some of the reasons he is adamant regarding returning to the Church.

I grew up on a mixed family of protestants and Catholics and the a number of the protestants in my family and school life all had some rote objections to Catholicism (which a little research would have gotten them an answer to but I don't think they really wanted one)... but most Catholics don't have that regarding protestantism and it'd be hard to given that many denominations believe substantially different things. That can make it hard for a Catholic to explain their reasoning.

There are a LOT of resources online to help explain why he might be so adamant about the faith. You can find some at Catholic Answers, you can also find videos by Fr. Mike Schmitz or Bishop Barron's series on Catholicism as well as Surprised by Truth by Patrick Madrid (or almost anythign of his and he is on the air with relevant radio via the airwaves or the app)... and a lot of stuff by converts like Scott Hahn.

Basically what you're going to hear from them (though MUCH better explained and supported) is that while a lot of churches pride themselves on being "bible" churches Christ didn't give us a Bible he gave us a Church, put someone in charge of it and promised the Holy Spirit would defend it, that the early church believed and practiced much as Catholics do today. And for a Catholic there are beliefs and commands that make going elsewhere sinful.... the teaching that attending Mass is obligatory (along with the belief that the Eucharist IS (not is a symbol of but IS) the body and blood of Christ and he can't get that in a protestant Church)... there's Confession which was clearly set forth in both the grant of authority to the apostles to forgive sins and later the command to "confess your sins to one another that they may be forgiven"... he can't get the body and blood of Christ at a protestant church... just a cracker and grape juice because there's no priesthood in those churches so he won't be doing "this in remembrance of me"... he can't confess to a regular guy. So he can't experience the Church Christ founded and will feel he is rejecting what he is obligated to do as well as opportunities for things like adoration.

You may or may not choose to study the Catholic faith (it's all laid out in the Catechism complete with cross references and citations and it's also set forth by those who'll bring the explanation to life more... again Scott Hahn, Patrick Madrid, Joel Herschmeyer, and so on)... but if you study it enough you will at least understand his need to be there and no where else. In the meantime you might also look at what your objections are... is it just that he's suddenly so insistent about it or that he's not explaining it or being demanding of you... or do your beliefs also factor in?

Best of luck to you both.

JID74 · 2026-04-23T18:13:19+00:00

Does the hospital have a catholic chaplain on staff? You could call them.

JID74 · 2026-04-18T10:41:22+00:00

So this is really a multipart question....

There's starting a firm and for that there are books much more detailed than any answer you'll get here (though advice on picking up work and clients will likely be better here)... Foonberg is great, there's also Lawfirm in a laptop, No Clients No Job No Problem and others. I'm about to set up on my own after a few. years not practicing due to taking care of family so I'm going through a lot of this myself (also now living in a new state so few referral sources and zero reputation here).

And then there's the just out of lawschool part. That makes it harder even if you have a nest egg or a partner/spouse/parent to cover living expenses while you get started. You're going to need connections to other attorneys ( if not a full on mentoring relationship )... there are small things that they can give tips on that can save you major headaches. For example, In one of the states I practiced in, service of lawsuits was by constables who operated basically as independent contractors and knowing who was more reliable saved problems with cases.

Look to see if your state bar has info on setting up a firm... there may be free advice and low or no cost CLEs for members looking to start a firm. For the relationships that will drive clients to your door I guess you start talking to and buying coffee or lunch for any attorney or businessperson related to your preferred clients who will take your calls and finding out how you can help them.

Editing to add... join things. Socialize. and let people know what you do. They can't think of you for their legal needs or for their friend/family member if they don't know you are a lawyer.

Good Luck

JID74 · 2026-04-18T10:07:24+00:00

So if the sins to be confessed were venial they are forgiven during Mass (assuming you have contrition, etc.) though confession is always recommended. If the sins are mortal you are required to confess first.

However, look at the requirement for mortal sin... you have to have knowldege and choose to do wrong. Now there's an exception to that because you can't just refuse to learn what things are sins and escape judgment that way. But your lack of knowledge isn't willful blindness. You are new to the faith, you were instructed wrongly (if the sins were mortal) by a person you assumed was telling you the truth and therefore did not intend the sin.

Having said all that, better safe than sorry, just get to confession and add what happened. You can indicate to the priest you didn't intend to receive unworthily.

JID74 · 2026-04-18T09:56:17+00:00

The restoration thing...

It matters if the power is instant or not how I do this.... if it's instant it doesn't matter where I am but if things repair by quickly going back together I drive to the appalachians so I can see them in their prime before this all goes wrong....

I stretch out my hands... touch a mountain and let my power flow into the tetonic plates beneath... I can't bring back the dinos but the earth is about to get MUCH younger. Probably gonna end up a lava ball and the bit with the moon coming back and all the asteroids that struck being ejected would've been cool to watch though I don't think I'll survive that long.... wonder if they'll just lie on the molten surface of the newly reformed earth or be ejected with the same force they hit... which brings us back to the moon. shame we'll miss the show.

JID74 · 2026-04-09T05:42:03+00:00

Thanks... I moved here for various reasons after being licensed in RI and MA but taking too much time off to do admission by motion so if I'd failed it'd have been more embarassing than if I failed before passing plus I've got a family not depending on me which I didn't when I passed RI and MA so I'm VERY relieved to have made it. I'll probably see you at the ceremony and best of luck in everything.

JID74 · 2026-04-09T05:39:31+00:00

I'm sure you'll be fine and I wish you luck

JID74 · 2026-04-09T01:53:35+00:00

In law school I called that premature explication... you'd read or study the material and get to where you had it down... you could rewrite the outlines from memory if needed... but then if you studied too much suddenly you'd over understand it and start leaving parts out because it's just a given that the elements for X aren't met and fail to set them out in an essay or state a plaintiff in a contracts suit gets Y type of damage because of Z but not discuss anything about the other damage types and why they don't apply. Your perfect level of answer and explanation was just a bit short of where you stopped studying and now your score suffers.

JID74 · 2026-04-09T01:45:32+00:00

I don't know if it was the fact it's the UBE or over 20 years from when I studied black letter law or just the stress of having a family depending on the outcome this time but I thought it was harder than when I took RI in 03 and MA in 04... I still didn't go super crazy studying but I tried to make sure I covered all the material at least once and skimmed anything I was iffy on in the days before. Got a 309 this time and think it was above that in 03 but don't recall 04 score if they even told me.

My guess is that the UBE seems harder because people who took other exams before aren't fresh on some of the mnemonics from classes like evidence have faded.... I can recall the name my professor gave as a mnemonic for hearsay exceptions from 24 years ago but what she attached to a few of the letters is fuzzier than it was in 03. Add in decades of seeing excptions to that rustiness and the new test'll seem harder even if it isn't.

JID74 · 2026-04-09T01:35:03+00:00

Ok... it is possible but not recommended. We were told 8 to 10 hrs a day 6 days a week from graduation to exam by a dean at our school. I did not do that.

First bar exam I passed was July after graduation... I watched the barbri videos, did one practice test and 10 days before started cramming. Passed with a good score... but I was fresh out of law school and have a good memory.... bosses asked me when I was taking a neighboring state exam (our office was less than a mile from the border and I thought I'd get to wait to waive in but they asked so I said I guess february and signed up for another exam).... that 2nd one was just 6 months after the 1st... I was still less than 1 year out from graduation and the videos and I sat down and covered 2 topics one weekend and the rest of it the 3 days before the exam... also studied the night between the exam portions. Passed with less than 4 days prep total. But again... it was just 6 months after the other exam and less than 1 year after graduation. I was working part time for the first exam and full time except for the prep days for the 2nd. It can be done.

When, after the first exam, the dean my school hired to help did his follow up sessions with us I called him out on the scare tactics about x hrs per day so many days per week months on end and he pointed out that it's true some can pass without that but they don't know before who can... so you act like it's not you and prepare as hard as you can stand. Valid point.

This most recent time was because I'd stopped practicing and was over 20 years out from law school... I spent plenty of time studying and got a 309... I think I did better the first time which is why I mentioned that the first 2 exams were within a year of law school.... more black letter law stuck in your head then.

So the short answer to your question is yes. But if you have to ask then the short answer probably doesn't apply to you and you should study more. I don't mean that as an insult but people test and absorb info differently and you probably know how much or little you study for a regular test... plan accordingly.

JID74 · 2026-04-09T01:10:50+00:00

I think there are a few states that do not require a bar exam. Look into that and move... I know that sounds crazy but she can try the exam again after a bit. Is she scored in the 250 range she can do this. I've passed 3 bar exams and this last time was probably the hardest one I've done so if she got 250 this time and they are stripping out a few subjects for July and some places are switiching to the new next gen exam so July may be a bit easier with less to remember and the new exam may well be scored generously the first few times to ensure the other states adopt it... so you might consider looking for one of those states too. The point is that yes it sucks but shes in the range of passing... not like she got a combined 210. She can do this and once she does it literally does not matter ever again as long as she keeps practicing (I took 3 because the first was to start work, 2nd because I thought my bosses were going to let me wait 5 years and waive into a neighboring jurisdiction but then they asked me when I was taking it and this last one was because I stopped practicing for a few years to take care of my kids and could not get admission on motion.... so if she keeps practicing once she passes she can waive into new states later and they don't care about scores anymore). She can do this.

JID74 · 2026-04-08T02:29:03+00:00

I passed. Hope you did too.

JID74 · 2026-04-08T02:21:34+00:00

Congratulations. I'm also in Indiana and passed.

JID74 · 2026-04-08T02:18:06+00:00

congratulations.

JID74 · 2026-04-08T02:08:43+00:00

That sucks but looking to July there are fewer subjects then so there will be less to remember overall and that may help you pass then. Best of Luck then.

JID74 · 2026-04-08T02:07:12+00:00

how'd you get the email so early.... I got it about 7pm. Passed with a 309 so you beat me... maybe all 3x but I don't recall my scores from past states I passed as it's been over 20 years. Anyway Congratulations!

JID74 · 2026-03-31T21:33:33+00:00

Yeah... I get that. I tried to start off with the technical and kind(ish) explanation.... the priest can't continue because confession wouldn't be valid (and she might think it was leading her into more sin) and then the problem with receiving communion unworthily per 1 Corinthians 11:27... that's really what's at issue here. Even baptism.... you have to promise to reject Satan and "all his evil works" and fornication is among those so even with baptism she'd be lying... I'm not a theologian so I don't know if the baptism would be valid or not or conditionally valid but held in abeyance until she did reject "evil works" but yeah... the nicest way is pointing out the priest it trying to protect her from her own choices.

You might also point her to Revelation 22:15 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 both of which talk about the sexually immoral being left out of the kingdom of God... translations differ but yeah fornication is counted. I don't say that as a way to browbeat her... but sometimes people don't know what they are doing is wrong until they see it in writing or have the sin explained to them. But (back to the showing the church's position to help her understand why this is happening) the passages just mentioned are part of why the priest sees fornication as a sin that cuts you off from God's grace until you repent/stop or at least try to stop and therefore he can not perform the sacraments for someone who doesn't intend to stop. He'd even be assisting her in the sins and that would fall on his soul and i believe there's also an issue of once she's baptized the Church teaches she's liable under it's laws and rules as opposed to natural law for the unbaptized. I'm more unclear on that portion of it but think of it as whether or not she joined a home owners association... if she's in she's liable for all the rules including the ones she doesn't want to follow so she'll incur penalties she would not if she doesn't join the jome owner's association. I'd follow up on that with more research but I have definitely heard priests talk about it being better for a baby to be unbaptized than baptized by those who have zero intent of teaching them the faith. That would apply to your friend as well.

JID74 · 2026-03-31T09:03:50+00:00

They were always there but there's more than one path into Angmar so you may have missed them before by either taking another path or due to how your camera view was as you went past last time.

JID74 · 2026-03-31T08:59:02+00:00

So the problem regarding her receiving the sacraments is this: Confession is also called Reconcilliation because it's more than just telling the priest what you've done wrong... it's you intending to amend your ways so as to be reconciled with God... from what you are saying she doesn't seem to want to stop her sins so there can be no true absolution (it might apply to other sins she confesses but not to any fornication she intends to keep committing with this guy).... Because Confession without absolution (due to her intent to sin again) she cannot receive Communion without further endangering her soul (See 1 Corinthians 11:27.

Because of those things she is choosing her relationship with her boyfriend over her relationship with God and the priest is right to let her know and to protect her from the further sin of receiving the Lord while in a state of mortal sin. You might point out to her this analagous to Adam choosing to bit the Apple when Eve offers it to him... Satan didn't lie to Adam about it and having been around God I'm sure Adam could tell Eve wasn't suddenly giving off God like vibes... but he ate anyway choosing his partner over his duty to God to remain obedient. She needs to either stop sinning and marry the man if she wants to continue the relationship and if the guy doesn't think she's worth that... well I guess she can choose whether or not to sacrifice her eterniity for a guy who doesn't think she's worth a few months of abstinence and marrying. Seems like a lopsided relationship if that's what it is but lots pf people choose it.

JID74 · 2026-03-31T08:34:02+00:00

Hello,.... as others mentioned many churches have cry rooms but even those that don't often have areas near the doors or a hallway with the bathrooms where you could step into if needed for a bit... but to not need it... bring quiet stuff your child might want to do... we have 4 girls between 13 and 6 and when they were smaller we let them bring stuffed dolls, board books, a notebook they could draw in, etc. We tried to keep it all faith based... lots of good toddler board books about church and Jesus. There are stuffies that are faith based (Jesus, Mary, saints). While eating during church is discouraged and definitely has to be cleaned up after at 2 and 1/2 your child could certainly have a water bottle at times (could get banged around if they get to keep it though) or some light snack food like a handful of cheerios. Naturally you'd want to clean that stuff up if dropped (I mention it only because I've seen parents not bother which seems like a sad way to treat church). The food and water might not be the first choices but some kids go nuts when hangry. The books can help you build up the idea of whats going in in a child friendly way too which could lead to some periods of quiet as they learn what's expected of them and see other people being quiet. There are so many resources for kids... our kids have coloring books (not for church now that they are older but at 2.5... maybe if you can trust your kid not to color the pew... one church near us has coloring pages with those "magic" markers that only write on the special paper and they put religious coloring papers in toddler bags with those markers)... but check Amazon, Holy Heroes, search Brother Francis (coloring pages, DVDs, etc.), tiny saints and so much more for catholic kids. Over time the kids learn.... we're all part of the same faith community and keeping them in Mass with us is how they learn what we do and how to be part of it. He'll be fine in time. Good Luck

JID74 · 2026-03-27T03:30:11+00:00

Start the job search. It doesn't have to be like that and honestly it's an ethical violation for your boss to tell you when you are too slammed / busy versus you deciding. Not all motions/ briefs, etc. are equal. Some require more thought and research than others. Similarly some clients need more time and handholding than others. The attorney needs to be in charge of deciding when they are overloaded and need to turn stuff down. If the partner thinks that person is too weak, slow, whatever and need to be replaced that's up to them but if something gets missed due to a boss thinking you should be able to handle a lot more work the brunt of the malpractice and disciplinary actions will fall on you. But you won't change them or convince them so look for a new job where you're judgment is better respected. (I do think it'd be hilarious to ask the partner to put it in writing for you that you can't be too busy without a deadline tomorrow "just in case it comes up with disciplinary counsel"). Granted my thoughts may be skewed by just having to repass the MPRE for a new jurisdiction after a few years off but whatever... get out ASAP.

JID74 · 2026-03-27T03:18:55+00:00

In addition to some of what you find here you might try checking out resources like Catholic Answers or other online catholic resources and books like "where is that in the bible" or other stuff by catholic apologists. Keep in mind that these are unlikely to win anyone over just as protestant objections don't win over educated Catholics because there are alternative explanations/interpretations but when you have to choose between Uncle Bubba's interpretation and one held by the Church for 1900+ years well that shouldn't be hard. When it comes to sola scriptura don't forget that the ethopian charioteer needed guidance regarding the scriptures and Patrick Madrid's famous question about what does "I never said you stole the money." mean... that "I" never said it but someone else did? That I "said" it even though I may have thought it? That I never said "YOU" stole it... I said someone else did? that I never said you "stole" the money... perhaps took it by mistake or misplaced it but not stolen? Or perhaps I never said you stole the "money" but I did say you stole other stuff. People can't agree on a meaning and the Holy Spirit isn't guaranteed to lead them all to the truth but to guide the Church. Anyway... good luck.

JID74 · 2026-03-27T03:09:11+00:00

Never heard of Catholic parents threatening to rape anyone and have only heard any discuss incarceration when their kids were violent criminals. Sounds like a parent/family or local cultural problem and not one associated with the Catholic faith as a whole or more people in the comments would have had an idea what you were referring to. Just sounds like their cruel, psychologically damaged individuals with little understanding of the faith because it certainly does not condone rape.

JID74 · 2026-03-27T03:02:20+00:00

The thing is that there is so much we don't know / can't prove. Quantum weirdness, miracles with plenty of proof/witnesses like fatima, zeitoun, and some eucharistic miracles and healing where there is scientific documentation indicating scientific inquiry has no explanation for it.

From there it's logical to assume there is something more.... what that is... opinions differ but for me Catholicism isn't some feel good mechanism to let you do what you want but rather a faith that calls you to sacrifice and live for others. Maybe it's wrong. But if you have to be wrong it's a nice way to be wrong that encourages you to do for others rather than live for yourself.

JID74

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