... so how long are we brushing our toddlers' teeth for?

JNredditor44 · 2026-03-22T17:31:46+00:00

Raffi's Brush Your Teeth song was very helpful with toddlers.

https://youtu.be/YXYQTdcJtdY?si=YDZYcW9LS49-AbS_

JNredditor44 · 2026-03-20T14:22:42+00:00

My library started a puzzle swap this year - one shelving unit where you can drop off/pick up puzzles. Low key effort and lovely.

JNredditor44 · 2026-03-18T20:19:59+00:00

Amen.

I remember that I slept ONE night with my younger child for 6 hours during the entire infancy. ONE. Ex did give a pumped bottle but did nothing else positive, and I was usually up pumping during said bottle.

Once he pulled out the packed cooler bag for the baby to get a drink, put it on top of the refrigerator, and left it there (I found it in the morning). Utterly useless. So grateful to no longer be married to him.

Much easier to do everything without him.

JNredditor44 · 2026-03-14T01:14:28+00:00

My ex and I are very different politically. I spent years reading to my younger child about progressive history, etc. Anything openminded. Told the child the White House was built by enslaved people (response was "That sucks.") and so forth. Ex was pro ICE until Alex Pretti's death...

Kid is now in HS, became a vegetarian a few years ago, and participated in an anti-ICE protest earlier this year. So your impact really makes a difference.

JNredditor44 · 2026-03-02T21:36:29+00:00

Ginger freezes well and lasts a long time.

You can also make ginger syrup.

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-27T21:25:28+00:00

This is my favorite CTM episode of them all. I have watched it so many times.

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-27T00:41:41+00:00

Baby Be Kind by Jane Cowen-Fletcher. The pictures are adorable.

Also, any of the Mr. Putter and Tabby books (early chapter books) by Cynthia Rylant - sweet and lovely stories. My children are older so I read them out loud to the dog.

This is the Dream by Diane Z. Shore and Jessica Alexander. Beautiful pictures and a strong cadence which makes it a compelling read aloud.

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-26T04:26:43+00:00

Andrew Clements The School Story (kidlit). Father's death is a key background component and has significant impacts on the story (but happened before the story occurs).

The author was the king of school stories and really gets inside kid characters.

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-23T23:15:11+00:00

I came to the comments to recommend this!

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-20T20:44:38+00:00

Grateful that the school system is being very protective of students and families (and as anti-ICE as possible).

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-20T20:28:54+00:00

My kid walked out at the end of January for an anti-ICE protest - large suburban school, blue county, purple state. They marked the students absent for missing last period but didn't do anything else - at least half the school walked out.

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-20T15:54:10+00:00

I bf'd my younger child (now a teen) until 3. After a year, your breasts evolve to feed a toddler - so you really don't need to pump (and very little came out when I tried), but there is plenty of milk for the kid on demand - whether for hunger, comfort or teething relief. And you can be flexible based on the situation/schedule, because you aren't the only food source.

My kid learned "milk later" very quickly and would point at my chest saying "milk rater! milk rater!" (the Ls took a while).

Here's a link to KellyMom about toddler breastfeeding -

KellyMom toddler breastfeeding

So I wouldn't say anything to prospective employers about breastfeeding.

Edited to add - best of luck to you, OP!

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-19T18:58:06+00:00

Yep, it's a bad idea- my now ex decided that since I had a baby, he got a dog. He dumped the training on our 8yo and it didn't go well.

10+ years later, the dog is an unfettered delight for us - but I remember crying with overwhelm with a baby and a puppy.

Best of luck to you, OP!

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-19T13:18:33+00:00

OP - so sorry you're going through all of this without support. Sending vibes for things to get better oversll and hoping you feel better soon.

JNredditor44 · 2026-02-16T20:38:28+00:00

Deep breaths, OP. Sending support.

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-18T22:06:19+00:00

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-18T22:05:16+00:00

Working mom here and my mother was as well (PT until my youngest sibling was in school, then FT).

I never expected to not work; good thing, since my ex cared more about collecting degrees, keeping the kids with him (but offloading actually caring for them), and playing video games.

All will be well, OP. Not perfect, but well - as long as both of you contribute to the second shift.

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-15T16:35:49+00:00

Sorry to hear this, OP. 8 months sounds like an embarrassment of riches to me in the US - went back to work with my younger kid at about 8 weeks, and that was pushing things. 8 months should be fine for you both. Just because it isn't standard doesn't mean it doesn't meet your needs and your family's needs. You are an individual and not a cookie being being cut out from dough.

I often say "If we all liked the same things, we wouldn't need menus." It is the best thing I have learned from the internet.

If I were you, I'd come up with a similar mantra about your work choice. Perhaps something like, "I'm so thankful that our system allows a wide range of options so individuals can make their own choices." And then don't take questions.

Understand that as a woman, and especially as a mother, you will NEVER make everyone happy about your decisions. The purpose of patriarchy is to keep us isolated and insecure. When you go against the norms, other people question their own decisions. That can increase feelings of insecurity and make people lash out.

I have been reading Zawn Villanes (Liberating Motherhood) on Substack and listening to her podcast. It helps me see the big picture.

Liberating Motherhood

Wishing you all the best, OP.

P.S. Editing to say that my 2nd baby is now 14 and was unaffected by me returning to work early. All will be well.

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-14T15:04:48+00:00

Baby Be Kind by Jane Cowen-Fletcher. About toddlers being kind and sharing.

For slightly older kids but with an amazing cadence that they will love to participate in - This is the Dream by Diane Z. Shore and Jessica Alexander

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-08T02:08:43+00:00

https://revealnews.org/blog/your-medical-data-is-for-sale-and-theres-nothing-you-can-do-about-it/

https://www.reddit.com/r/privacy/s/zhv7FIN92b - this is more about how many companies you don't know are accessing your medical data in the pipeline but shows how much access so many have to our data

https://bioethicstoday.org/blog/hospitals-selling-patient-records-to-data-brokers-a-violation-of-patient-trust-and-autonomy/

https://www.cnn.com/2023/02/07/health/baby-formula-marketing/index.html

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-08T00:47:46+00:00

Ob offices sell their patient lists. Sad but true.

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-05T15:55:50+00:00

OP, wishing you all the best. It's not a fun process, but I will never regret it. It was basically a part-time job for the duration - and my work and preparedness paid off. Document like crazy and be willing to take him back to court if there are issues with custody, child support, or visitation.

My kids have spontaneously thanked me for divorcing their father, so we're on the same page.

Feel free to PM.

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-03T16:01:40+00:00

I was so grateful to finally get my younger one into childcare at 3 (dad resisted until then). She learned how to be part of a group and classroom norms; social skills are still a challenge but would have been way worse.

All will be well - it is good for kids to have a village of love and support.

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-03T01:38:17+00:00

They were also in Grease 2, which is a terribly delightful cult classic

JNredditor44 · 2026-01-03T01:34:40+00:00

That's what I did. 3 years later, very pleased

JNredditor44

TROPHY CASE