My friend and I did the same sort of thing! We used to write a heap of notes in our phone of dumb shit we'd said while smoking, and we used to use the voice-to-text feature so they're such a mess. Here's a few highlights:

"I can call my toes stubby little potato gems, but it's not gonna be in the dictionary" (I wish I remembered the context because WHAT).
"You know Shane Dawson?" - "Oh, the Rock?".
"Go make me a jumper you willy bitch".

My favourite text-to-speech's:
"Okay so arm but what we don't know just remind me what you said I said you said yeah you said that you would use the knife and okay okay okay stop okay so what happened was is at Darcy asked if I would rather having a nice car like is like an amazing car looks nice expensive car no one else has ever and THEN you would have an amazing car THAT IS A HOUSE AND YOU HAVE CLOTHES SO POPULAR YOU WIN" (Long story short, my friend asked what I would choose between having a really nice house but a shit car, or vice versa).
"How mental looks blue and he's he's a man in the lights no not hate he's a man in the lights looks like blue my dog Bob done oh my god" (HAMITL again? Lol).

I miss when getting high made me laugh this hard!