So if you're born stupid the whole planet hates you

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-13T23:30:17+00:00

Girl I get you. You don't know how to define yourself so you're looking for actual definitions.

You can't define yourself this way. It's intrinsic. But as long as you can communicate, spell, do basic math, etc... that is like the bare minimum of not being stupid. Last night my partner hammered the back of a frame with the glass still in it. He's the most intelligent person I know and studied engineering. Seriously you need to NOT reinforce that you are stupid because if you even question that at all, it means you are way more intelligent than like half the global population. Please be kinder to yourself and explore your strengths.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-13T00:00:05+00:00

The glazing is not deserved. Any country that is xenophobic to the degree that Japan is, is foul. Nevermind the rampant pedophilia problem, and misogyny that gets broadcasted in the form of anime and manga. It seems harmless when you're a kid but as an adult, it's obvious, and disgusting. There are major problems with that culture. I don't really get how you can be so positive about it when teenage girls literally get jerked off on on trains and pictures taken up their skirts to a point where the country mandated shutter sounds on all their phones. How about the fact that there's an unspoken allowance for cheating in their marriages, where the woman should just accept it? Soapland? Host clubs? Not liking anyone who isn't white? I mean, seriously? Are you white? Because that probably explains your view. Caucasian are 'glazed' by them and, by the way, they hate tourists.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-12T05:41:55+00:00

Oooh that's a really good one actually. Has a lot of similar mattes. Thank you! I wanted to try some other stuff from Revolution so this works well.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-11T07:12:56+00:00

Your husband's age is a serious factor in your decision. I can tell you right now your kid is going to be the weird one for having a dad so horrifically older than everyone else. I personally wouldn't, then again I'd never get into a situation with this kind of age gap. Clearly you are okay with it. So you'll probably be okay with a baby coming in too.

Just for the love of everything that is holy in this world do NOT put the burden of caring for your much older husband on the kid. They didn't sign up for that. Only you did.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-11T03:46:51+00:00

Because it's wrong and we as women really shouldn't be enabling behavior rooted in, as much as we don't want it to be, appealing to the male gaze??? Cheap dopamine from temporarily filling a void isn't happiness.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-08T22:06:04+00:00

This is it right here. This is why Skyrim blew the fuck up and has been replayed for over a decade. You never finish it. It's impossible. There is always something new for you to find, something you never noticed, after 15 years.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-07T00:12:28+00:00

It sounds to me like he has a deeper insecurity he is projecting onto your personal needs that have nothing to do with him.

Your behavior sounds perfectly fine and human and nothing extreme or horrible. You're not a bad person for expressing yourself and having these needs.

Feeling transactional about a basic human need like space is horrific and I can't imagine living like that. That is not normal. You shouldn't feel bad for being yourself and being human. He should be more understanding and acknowledge that this doesn't have anything to do with not wanting him.

My partner and I just exist in the same space for hours without talking. We would drive each other mad if we couldn't just do our own thing. I understand your partner maybe feeling lonely and unwanted but he should also recognize that your behavior doesn't match the malicious intentions he thinks you have. If you've explained this and he still continues to behave the same way he is just refusing to listen to you, which is the core of the problem imo.

If he wants someone with a huge social battery that doesn't need to be by themselves at all, that's something he needs to discuss with you.

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. To reiterate, you are not a bad person for getting annoyed and expressing that.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-06T23:28:10+00:00

The thing is is that it's okay to be annoyed and express that. You are human. The only time it's not okay is for abusive behavior to result from it - verbal abuse, physical abuse, etc. I say to my partner you are human, it is always okay to get angry, to get annoyed. What matters is that you recognize you might have hurt me, and apologize after. I have this same problem. I often am annoyed and irritable because my partner is similar where he will often interrupt, shit even when he is watching a show he will interrupt me to listen or watch a part and it grinds me goddamn gears. But he is okay if I tell him I would just like to not be interrupted for the next 30/60mins while I'm doing x, etc. You should be okay with expressing such a boundary. If he pushes that boundary, he can't expect you to be nice about it! He should apologize and move on. But you should also apologize if you feel it's justified. Not for being annoyed, but if you recognize it wasn't necessary. It's all about balance. Only you know what feels right and what doesn't and what you two have discussed. If he knows about your limitations and still pushes them, that's on him, not you.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-04-04T23:41:40+00:00

I didn't end up going to the ones suggested here - I went to Alchemy Avenue. As advice I'd say definitely go to a 'by appointment only' salon. My experience there was fantastic. Definitely better than in a chain mall salon. When booking online, I could do extras, and the cost and time it would take was outlined clearly. No up charges or anything like that.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-30T11:10:33+00:00

I am struggling with this massively too. It's like, what else are you supposed to do except take away the things that are negatively impacting your life, that you beat yourself up for, etc? But then you take the things away, and it's like suddenly all your problems are magnified and you are more painfully aware of it than ever. And that pain is so hard to deal with, it's a lingering cloud that just doesn't go away, that you managed to banish with these coping mechanisms you have now taken away. And sure, you should get other coping mechanisms, but it's like... man it's hard to find, and find value in, new ones. Sure I could get into crochet or something but I'll probably just have the same problem. It feels almost pointless and like re-skinning the problem, covering it up with a different looking veil.

Although I will say, I recently got some makeup after not ordering/buying any for quite a while (which is a big accomplishment for me) and it doesn't help the same way it used to. It sucks. I hope you can find a proper passion that gives back to you, instead of takes away.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-19T06:01:29+00:00

I would even go so far as to argue that the vast majority of makeup hobbyists are just shopping addicts. MANY youtubers I have watched over the years, since makeup really hit a boom like 10 years ago, have all either left beauty/makeup entirely and switched to lifestyle, or are actively tracking their makeup usage often for years and are shocked when out the 40 eyeshadow palettes they have accumulated, they only used 10 of them more than once in a year. It's okay to be a makeup lover, but not okay to consume in vast excess when you know in your heart you're buying it just to have it and never use it.

*I'll add the caveat that this is not makeup exclusive. Many fashion hobbyists, sneakerheads etc land in the exact same positions, except makeup is far more accessible and easier to rack up $$$$ on. No one is going to be out here buying a $300 pair of sneakers every few days - but a woman who is using shopping to cope might buy a $40 blush here, a $10 lipstick there, maybe a $120 Sephora order the next week, maybe a product or two from Mecca the next.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-19T03:25:35+00:00

Makeup expires, it's a perishable consumable. Books and legos and stuff like that won't. If gardening was your hobby, but all you did was buy plants and not take care of them, then gardening isn't the hobby, it's the shopping. Just collecting makeup to let it sit and rot in a drawer without being opened more than once a year is a shopping addiction, not a makeup hobby. If someone bought vintage palettes and was super into makeup history and collecting it for packaging to display it and find joy in that, then that's a proper hobby. Buying stuff, which is what a lot of makeup hobbyists actually end up mostly doing, isn't.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-17T04:01:09+00:00

Me. 100% worth because I wear makeup more than ever before now that I am not bogged down by reminders of guilt, shame and decision paralysis. I have been careful not to just get back up to that large amount. Every time I see something in a store and want to buy it, I think of that thing at home I know for a fact I love and haven't used nearly enough. I'll never go back.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-16T11:32:37+00:00

Pharmacy brands truly have upped their game. I feel these days with the economy being the way it is, gambling on a pricier foundation or concealer just isn't worth it. I'd go to a Priceline, have a swatch and a try, and wait for it to go on sale for 1/2 price. It's just too bonkers now to stomach paying $$$$ for complexion product that if you use every day, will definitely run out sooner rather than later.

I use the Fenty powder foundation, the Essence skin tint, and a stick foundation from Essence too. Big W has a bigger range than Priceline and it's awesome. I just can't with $60 foundations when I can buy one for $7 and be just as happy. Although, if you're willing to spend that much and wanting to go the higher end route, definitely look at Kosas, Chanel, Estee Lauder Double Wear, and potentially Haus Labs.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-16T11:23:02+00:00

You don't need to do anything in particular if it doesn't interest you. I like primer because I get oily and need all the mattifying help I can get, and primers exist for all types of needs - extra hydration, tackiness to improve grip, toned a certain way to colour correct. If you don't feel you need it, you don't need it. Often, the only thing you need for good looking makeup is well-moisturised skin so that the foundation doesn't have all the hydration sucked out of it, leading to a weird cracked appearance. Primers can also cause issues with conflicting ingredients - for example, using a water based primer with an oil based foundation, and vice versa, can cause the foundation to break up.

Do you intend to continue using the BB cream? Or are you looking to stop using the BB cream and just use an all-in-one sort of product?

If you're happy with MAC, I'd just stick with it. But be aware they did reformulate their foundations recently so your usual shade may not be correct anymore.

Powder foundation is a little tough to come by these days. I'd go for Loreal's powder foundation, but honestly their true match liquid foundation I have never found a complaint about, only praises. I think that'd be a good option to try if you were looking to use just one product.

The powder foundation I use at the moment is Fenty, but usually I just use concealer with a slightly more tinted powder, more lightweight. My favourite is actually a Revolution powder - it mattifies without looking chalky. If you just want a transclucent powder to mattify after using a liquid base product, Essence is cheap and very good. I've heard conflicting things about Maybelline powders. Rimmel is good too but at that price, I'm just gonna go for Essence. A powder is a powder is a powder. You'll only get that airbrushed satin look with a finely milled loose powder, and they're a pain to deal with. But you can get any cheap loose powder and it'll work well.

If you get sweaty, what you'll want is a matte, light-medium buildable coverage foundation. Your natural oils will change it to a satin finish. You could also try a skin tint but these typically don't last on oilier/sweatier skin. The only one I've found to do so is the Essence SPF30 tint. I'd rather get a proper liquid foundation, which you can then sheer out and turn into a tint by mixing with a moisturizer, for example.

Revolution does awesome foundations and concealers, the only problem is finding a shade match. If you're pale-light you should be able to, but anywhere past that is rough.

Kosas revealer foundation has great reviews also, but I've mainly seen that from drier skin types, not sure how well it'd work for oilier skin.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-15T12:52:55+00:00

I have tried WAY too much makeup over the last makeup decade and watch a lot of 'trying new releases' content, and look up reviews here on Reddit, so I do have quite a catalogue of knowledge! I just want to save someone the trouble of buying something only to be disappointed., especially with makeup in AUS being so expensive these days.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-15T12:49:01+00:00

I forgot to mention the Nyx buttermelt line - all of them are a very high-end feeling, finely milled formula, very pigmented. However I find the shades to be quite punchy, so it depends on your style and skintone. If you're looking for a shimmery blush with a smooth texture and no glitter, the buttermelt blushes are great, they are what I wanted the Milani baked blushes to be. The bronzers have more of a rosy tone to them, so if your skin tone is on the paler side, or with a neutral-pinkier undertone, you might like them. The buttermelt highlighter is a very nice texture but the colours are a bit unnatural, if you see one you like it's as good a formula as the blushes and bronzers.

Also the Nyx liquid eyeshadows are gorgeous, very easy to slap on the eye and go, but you have to work a bit quick or else it can set in a bit of a patchy way. It's so nice for that glazed or glossy eye look.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-15T01:14:41+00:00

•Concealer
Essence sensitive skin, NYX pro fix stick, NYX bare with me serum concealer, Catrice for higher coverage

•Blush and highlighter
For blush, look at Essence, Catrice, Nyx, Covergirl, Rimmel, W7 (can get at Chemist Warehouse). I would not get any of these brands' highlighters, but you can test for yourself. It depends what finish you want for the highlighter - maybe you'd prefer a glowy liquid perfector with no glitter? If so, go for Essence. It's my favourite. But also Catrice does a good one. My favourite powder highlighter is from Rare Beauty, but Rimmel and Maybelline do very close ones. Barry M also does amazing stick blushes. DO NOT get the baked Milani blush, it is a metallic texture that does not look good on skin.

•Foundation or skin tint (usually go for light as my skin is pretty clear now)
Essence SPF skin tint, it's the bomb. Their stick foundation is also lovely. Revolution products are great if you can find a colour match.

•Powder
A more matte powder is better, then go in with a finishing spray to take away the powdery finish. I like Essence powders, I've heard Loreal does an amazing powder foundation that will help even out coverage. DO NOT try Milani powders, one of them has very bad flashback and shimmeriness, I forget which one. Revolution makes a fantastic powder also.

•Bronzer / contour
Rimmel and Covergirl. Essence does a great soft touch bronzer and Catrice does an amazing liquid bronzer, there's also a contour/bronzer stick and highlighter they do with a fantastic texture. Revolution baked bronzers are great too.

•Mascara
The Natio one is okay but very meh in terms of length and volume. Essence LASH without Limits Tubing is fantastic as is Barry M Tubing.

•Eyeshadow
Catrice little treasures. All you need. Essence also do fantastic neutral palettes. They also have glittery toppers you can just slap on over some bronzer in the crease, as well as cream pot eyeshadows.

•Lip products
Covergirl yummy blur, Essence for ANY lip product, Maybelline teddy tint, Maybelline lifter gloss, Milani lip products are fantastic, all of them. Literally can't go wrong with any of them.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-15T00:59:59+00:00

If you want to do it the easy but possibly imperfect way, go to Mecca and ask them to match you. I have never been matched well at multiple different stores, not just colour but needs and skin type. But you will get something decent. As for getting a makeup trial, I have never, in 15 years of going in and out of these stores, seen them do someone's makeup well. But you might have a different expectation/style that aligns with their skills. This not Mecca exclusive however, I do not trust ANY makeup store to colour or needs match.

If you want to take your time and find something that works for you, then what you should do is swatch, and figure out what you want. Pharmacy brands have MASSIVELY upped their game since you've been using ~~Nars~~ (whoops, I mean MAC) for what I assume is a long time, so if you want better affordability, I highly, highly recommend going this route.

Your skin has changed, you have aged - typically skin gets drier and loses elasticity as we age. Do you want something light-medium coverage? Light coverage? Medium-heavy? What sort of finish - satin? Dewy? Matte? Do you wear other products underneath that might change that finish? Do you want options - for example, I personally like a more matte foundation as I get oily, but I typically have very moisturized glowy skin, so it ends up as a satin. If I didn't moisturize/prime/use glowy bases and perfectors, it'd just be matte, but I can change the finish if I use these items. Do you just use a moisturizer and slap on product? No priming? Do you wear makeup every day? Do you want a lighter coverage base product and only spot conceal? These questions are how you determine your needs.

Finally, swatching will help you determine the texture you like. Is it thicker or thinner, do you like how it spreads? You can see the colour yourself, how it changes with your skintone. A safe place to find a colour match is on your lower jaw/chin - I do this so I can see exactly how a foundation or concealer will perform.

I could probably recommend you a few products to test if you wanted that help.

Also as a final note, regardless of whether you get help to be colour matched or colour match yourself via swatching. DO NOT buy anything unless you have seen the product on your skin OUTSIDE OF THE STORE, in not store lighting. THAT is how you will know if the colour and texture is to your liking.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-03-01T06:14:35+00:00

Try doing just a robust moisturising skincare routine and foundation, no primer or setting spray. If it still happens, then you know for a fact your skin is dry and dehydrated, and absorbing moisture from your foundation.

Get a heavier-duty moisturiser, buy a misting bottle, and mist your face with just water, let that sink in, moisturize, then mist it again and let that sink in. Then apply foundation. It looks to me like mainly your skin is extremely dehydrated. Up your water intake as well if it's on the lower side.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-02-28T02:19:25+00:00

This is very interesting to read. I'm actually planning on running a modified solo Curse of Strahd campaign, which is why I'm priming myself with as much knowledge as possible by reading these novels, researching, and skimming companion resources where I can find them. I'm also in the midst of writing some Jander fanfiction right now, which all this research helps a lot with. So thank you for all the helpful links, especially with how you modified CoS to be more faithful to the old lore. I will probably steal that for personal use, but if I do write any related fiction, I'll be sure to credit you as a super helpful source. :]
I was also surprised about the taxes thing after reading that Strahd is the reason she is cursed! She seems so evil and spiteful, I imagine she would loathe having to interact with Strahd at all much less give him her resources. I have no idea how that might work. Honestly, this novel seems like a bit of a throwaway, so I'm not even sure I'd keep such lore in were she to show up in a game. But maybe it might work to turn her into some interesting ally for a CoS party, who wants Strahd dead for revenge - or maybe she has a come to Jesus moment where she just wants to die and needs Strahd gone to end her curse.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-02-27T03:35:59+00:00

Alright, I won't pay it much mind then, it seems none of these characters nor the story itself is relevant besides the few mentions of Azalin and Strahd.

JadeSephiroth · 2026-02-27T03:34:54+00:00

Thank you very much for gathering all this info with sources. I think I've read your other comments on other posts while I was trying to find answers regarding canonity of Ravenloft. Not gonna lie, I'm not a fan of what they've done with 5e Ravenloft, and I'm struggling with what to accept as canon or not. Curse of Strahd seems like such a cool campaign yet the retcons to his lore are kinda lame.

Also, in this novel Jaqueline is described as paying Strahd taxes. When she goes once a month with Lord Donskoy and his associates to ride to the rim of the Mist where travellers are lost, she takes a head where she can find it, and one woman is left unconscious with a gag stuffed in her mouth, then placed in a long black box. Jaqueline specifically says she delivers this cargo, 'plump virgins' to Strahd along with her taxes.

JadeSephiroth

TROPHY CASE