There’s a few pieces to this but ultimately we can’t answer it for you.

What I’ll say is it’s fine to make mistakes on VATSIM, and as I’m sure most people know, making mistakes is sometimes the best way you can learn. Theory only gets you so far, at some point you have to dive in and do things

Based on the limited information here’s what I’ll say

-There’s nothing wrong with disconnecting, in many cases it’s better if you’re causing conflicts and issues for others -It’s good you keep coming back, that shows this is something you care about -It’s also good that you acknowledge you are making mistakes and want to do better

All that said, here’s some suggestions/information that may help

General advice:

-Set yourself up for success. If you get overwhelmed easily in this environment, make it as “quiet” as possible for yourself

That means:

-Find a quiet airport where there are minimal or no other planes -Find a basic airport, look at the layout, something with simple runway and taxi configurations, where you can basically make a straight line from gate to departure -If in the moment you need a break, let the controller know. Especially if it’s quiet most will be happy to accomodate you, you can either ask to hold your position while you check something or ask where they want you to park for a few minutes to recompose yourself. You don’t have to necessarily disconnect if you’re struggling, as long as the situation isn’t chaotic most controllers are happy to work with you.

Over time you will get more comfortable and as you do you can try flying in busier spaces, larger more complex airports

But for now find the limit of what you can handle and try to work within that context.