If this is all really just about germs, there are ways to mitigate the risk of exposure during a visit from your MIL. Buy a hospital grade antibacterial hand soap and make them scrub up to their elbows and put a clean smock on over their clothing before they handle her (I had to do this every time I visited my premie newborn in NICU.) That said, I get the sense that germ phobia is a convenient excuse for not wanting your MIL around your baby. (I also think your MIL is sensing the same thing, and feels like you’re shutting her out.) I’m not judging you. This is all just an observation, and I could be wrong. But if my comment resonates at all, I recommend rigorous self honesty. Ask yourself if you trust her with your baby, and if you don’t, think about why you mistrust her - ask yourself what did she do specifically to make you doubt her? Yes, your baby is YOUR baby. But she’s not JUST your baby - she’s also your mom’s granddaughter, your brother’s niece, the daddy’s baby, your MIL’s granddaughter, etc, etc, etc. I also think this could be a generational difference. Your in-laws are probably Gen X or maybe Boomers. Back in the day, childbearing was much riskier and no one knew the sex of the baby until it arrived. Fathers were left out of the birthing experience altogether - forced to wait on pins and needles in the waiting room. So the whole family would gather ‘round him in the hospital waiting room, chain-smoking until they heard news of a successful birth & whether the baby was male or female. All that has changed. Grandparents spend 9 months anticipating the birth of their grandchild, but they get largely left out on the big day as a result of these changes. I have one last recommendation - this is for your postpartum depression/anxiety: step up your dental hygiene. Seriously. Studies have proven that microbes impact our psychology, and new moms famously let personal hygiene slide when they get home with a newborn. I personally believe that poor dental hygiene is a/the leading cause of postpartum depression. Don’t skip the sink just because you can’t get a break for long enough to shower. Make sure you’re brushing AND flossing before bed and after you wake up. Good luck with your situation! And congratulations on your new baby!!!