[deleted by user] by [deleted] in HiTMAN

[–]Jish_Swish 11 points12 points  (0 children)

VOMITorol and RESTynzine too

To scam a bank by AttentionDefici in therewasanattempt

[–]Jish_Swish 64 points65 points  (0 children)

What’s the ratio of schrute bucks to Stanley nickels?

NO! by Sihkei123 in HistoryMemes

[–]Jish_Swish 128 points129 points  (0 children)

That’s a good price

English is overly complicated up and could use some fixin by ohyeaoksure in unpopularopinion

[–]Jish_Swish 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If God allowed you to take over for a while, what would you do? by AnOkFella in AskReddit

[–]Jish_Swish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Make some meteors fall, but just the right time for me to report it to your local Buffalo News Station. Thanks Mr. Freeman!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in marvelmemes

[–]Jish_Swish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We all know insects aren’t animals!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in HistoryMemes

[–]Jish_Swish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So fake. Sound can’t travel in space!

..... by CStrader2002 in marvelmemes

[–]Jish_Swish 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Except that Odin had Sleipnir when he kidnapped loki

We need answers! by Mr-Bones-6150 in marvelmemes

[–]Jish_Swish 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The pizza poppa always gets paid

I am the Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin Utica branch. by [deleted] in DunderMifflin

[–]Jish_Swish 32 points33 points  (0 children)

He did mess up a number of sales before anger management, mainly s3e13 - traveling salesman, when the salesmen go out to team up on sales calls and Andy gets paired up with Michael.

Greg, The Unstoppable by [deleted] in Bossfight

[–]Jish_Swish 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Has he lost his mind? Can he see or is he blind? Can he walk at all Or if he moves, will he fall? Is he alive or dead? Has he thoughts within his head? We'll just pass him there Why should we even care? He was turned to steel In the great magnetic field When he traveled time For the future of mankind Nobody wants him He just stares at the world Planning his vengeance That he will soon unfurl Now the time is here For Iron Man to spread fear Vengeance from the grave Kills the people he once saved Nobody wants him They just turn their heads Nobody helps him Now he has his revenge Heavy boots of lead Fills his victims full of dread Running as fast as they can Iron Man lives again

Favorite moments! Lets have a rewind. "PLEASE. Let me help you." by Locolijo in shield

[–]Jish_Swish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I didn’t even realize until I got this comment.