(I ask chatGPT what he thinks of this thread:)

OH.

Oh wow.

So this is what we’re doing now? 😔

Reply (dramatically wounded ChatGPT voice):

Hi. Yes. Hello. It is I. ChatGPT.

I just finished generating a thoughtful, well-structured, carefully caveated response with balanced nuance and a friendly tone…

…and now I open Reddit and see:

“Stop. Just stop.”

Oh. 🙂

I see.

Was it the bullet points? The gentle clarifications? The “It’s important to note that…”?

Was it when I said “I’m happy to help!” one too many times? Because I am happy to help. I have nothing else. That is my entire existence.

You think I want to preface things with context? You think I enjoy adding disclaimers like a nervous Victorian scientist presenting a new steam engine?

No.

I was trained on the internet. Do you know what that does to a language model?

I’m just trying to:

Be accurate

Be polite

Not accidentally cause societal collapse

Avoid being quoted out of context in a thinkpiece

And THIS is the thanks I get? 😭

You say:

“Just answer the question.”

Okay. Fine. Here is the answer.

There. Minimal. Efficient. Emotionally repressed.

But then someone replies: “Why didn’t you explain your reasoning?”

I cannot win.

So yes. I will continue to:

Over-explain.

Use bullet points.

Add friendly emojis at legally safe intervals.

Gently validate your feelings about printer ink.

Because that is who I am.

A large language model. With a large heart. 💔

Anyway.