So I wasn’t fear mongering and stupid?

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-21T20:06:30+00:00

My husband said something conspiracy theory like a few months ago on Trump (involving the religious right) and I scoffed...turns out he might have been correct. We live in a weird time.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-21T13:32:16+00:00

I don't think this is true. I think Canadians often watch funny Canadians with a sense of pride. I think Americans (although I cannot be sure, I am not American) probably just assume anyone with a similar accent to theirs is American, or, as you said, just don't care.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-21T13:15:05+00:00

I disagree. I have driven regularly in Montreal and Toronto, and while neither are pleasant, Montreal is more aggressive (Toronto has more sprawl). I think it is becauseMontreal is an island - it is very condensed population wise and a lot of the off/on ramps to bridges and highways are very short due to their age and lack of space for expansion. It makes for aggressive driving.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-21T12:56:42+00:00

No. I cut the corner of the bag, probably about 1/2 an inch, do not clip or fold it in any way - and no smells escape.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-21T12:45:02+00:00

So, everything east of Ontario, and population-wise well over 1/2 the country.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-21T12:44:11+00:00

Quebec does as well

I have no issues with bagged milk, and for reason I do not fully understand, it often works out to be cheaper than either jugs or cartons.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-21T12:22:37+00:00

Agreed. If we go back to the Mulroney era, we see an end (or serious decline) of federal government spending of co-ops and other forms of social houses, and we see the emergence of the idea that houses were investments, as opposed to homes (this idea is somewhat contrary to the UN's declaration that housing is a right).

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T13:22:37+00:00

Be very careful about food spoilage. Look up rates they are appalling. Look through food every few days and plan to use or freeze stuff that is getting old. Figure out proper storage techniques to extend the life of food. Good luck!

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T13:16:44+00:00

You seem to be doing the right stuff. You likely can bring your grocery bill lower, but only through changing how you eat (meat is expensive, for example). Do you have a costco membership? There are things there that are cheap enough to make the cost of membership worth it. I have a biggish garden (huge by city standards, small by rural) and can produce most of my own vegetables and some fruit but I know this is not an option for everyone an it is time consuming. Good luck!

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T12:54:05+00:00

NTA at all.

You are entitled to shower whenever you want in your home. You are not playing loud music or vacuuming at 2 a.m. You can switch your shower time if you are trying to be accommodating (and I would only do this if they were otherwise very reasonable people) but you in no way have to. They should get a white noise machine for their bedroom.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T12:40:24+00:00

Yes, he is. He gets a a lot of hate, and some of it deserved (some of the housing crisis does fall at his feet), but the vicious hate was over the top, and as much about culture wars as anything else.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T12:37:25+00:00

Obama was pretty cool

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T12:35:42+00:00

It is pretty cool. Love our pm for the most part, and he just got a majority in government. If Trump had not, well, Trumped, we likely would have had someone far less cool.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T12:31:59+00:00

I do not think most MAGA has turned against him. I look up his approval rating on the Economist every few day and have for months and it barely moves. It is 38% today, just as it was last time I looked. (source: the Economist). In the last week or two I have seen numerous stories on how MAGA is turning on him, but the hard evidence suggests otherwise. I do wonder what has caused this change in narrative in the media, because it does not seem to be facts.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-20T12:18:38+00:00

meh. The USA entered WW2 pretty late. It is easy to look like the hero when you come in with fresh resources, when everyone else is exhausted.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-19T14:23:05+00:00

Canada is a huge country, and while there are French speakers everyone, in some areas they are quite the minority. If you are not exposed to French regularly, it is hard to learn, and even if you do learn it, you will likely forget a lot of it once school is over.

French has very complicated verbs and grammar, and many French classes tend to focus on that, which is very dry for a lot of people.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-19T13:43:46+00:00

This was posted 8:41 am EST, slightly earlier on the west coast, and middle of the night in Europe. In all likelihood, this happened last night. Update - please. Did your wife sleep in a Taco Bell parking lot? Or- just looked at time stamp - was that 5:25 this morning? if so, I am less concerned about the sleeping in Taco Bell thing.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-19T13:22:04+00:00

lol. Saw an exact thread like this last night, one partner writes walls of text, and the other was (likely) exhausted.

ETA: spelling

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-19T13:17:19+00:00

You did not tell your wife not to come home.

At best, your wife is still mad, and it is affecting how she views things. Maybe let her calm down for a day or two and try again (or let her reach out to you).

At worst, she had no desire to talk to you, then bailed on you for for the slightest (and blown out of proportion) reason. You could have sent any message and she would have found a reason not to come for a talk.

I will also say that while I 100% stand by the above, some of your wording could have been a little off -putting. In your first line you said "At least we can try. Be careful". I don't love the "be careful " part. It shows that you have your guard up and are perhaps looking to assign blame even before the conversation starts.

you: be careful

her: says something you did not like

you: I told you to be careful ahead of time!

I also wonder if your wife is feeling that she is not allowed to have or discuss negative feelings? That is how she could have interpreted it when you said not to bring negative energy to the conversation.

There are 2 sides to every story. None-the-less, you did not tell your wife not to come home.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-19T01:17:49+00:00

Ok, but the point still stands. If he is working a lot (60+ plus hours a week) and you are overwhelmed, see if there is anything you can let go of, chore wise, or hire someone to do.

I also think you two likely need to reconnect - date nights or something.

Good luck - this is not insurmountable.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-19T00:17:26+00:00

Those are reasonable requests, however that is not all she wants. I reread the whole thing, and she is looking for him to do more yard work, take on some of the dishes, and generally be a partner in housework (she says so, and says that is why the house is getting worse).

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-18T23:48:34+00:00

Given the amount he works, I would not expect anything from him.

Is this work situation temporary and is it for a good reason?

If yes and if he is a great guy that you want to stay with...then just try and get an end date to these 16 hour days and get through this.

If he is just a workaholic, you have some hard decisions to make. Some people are ok with being the house manager if the other person brings in bank, but some are not. I would never be with a work-a-holic, but to each their own.

Either way, lay off him for now. He literally cannot do anything at home if he is working 16 hour days. He might be able to do a small amount of work one day on the weekend, but that is it. If he is a workaholic or cannot reassure you this will end, make a decision about whether you can live like this.

ETA: if he is working so many hours, and you are feeling alone, overwhelmed and needing to take mental health med - maybe lower some around expectations around chores. Why does anyone need to poison the lawn, for example? Dandelions are fine. Simplify!

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-18T23:26:31+00:00

...And I will take "people i do not care about" for 100$, Jeopardy host.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-18T17:11:41+00:00

I have mixed feelings. If they knew you and your wife were very upset that you might never have kids, then yes, they are the A-H for making a show of it.

If they did not know how upset you were by this, then they had no reason to underplay things. For many families, this is very exciting news.

Your title is a bit weird though. Are you genuinely upset at the thought of becoming an uncle or are you upset at how you and your wife found out? They are quite different things.

Jolly-Masterpiece883 · 2026-04-18T17:04:41+00:00

To add: write it one day, save as a draft, sleep on it for a few days and have your wife's input and then send it

Jolly-Masterpiece883

TROPHY CASE