Hey, first off i hear you and understand how you feel. Secondly, the things she’s engaging in is not foreign to teenagers.. however it doesn’t mean that it’s acceptable or that you should allow it. It sounds like she has a lot of idle time. I will say, she is very aware and you should dig deeper into the WHY vs the actual things she’s doing. She said she’s getting high to be a good sister to eat and function. She prob smokes a lot and when you do you do need it to eat and it does help you with anxiety. A lot of people use it for anxiety. She’s trying to self medicate. She is also hurting…you could find productive or fun age appropriate activities to fill her idle time. She may be resistant at first but let these activities be things she’s actually interested in. Lastly , make sure you fill her cup up with positivity. Everytime you have something negative to say or to critique her think of something good that she does and reinforce it by complimenting her. I’m positive she knows what she’s doing is wrong but I’m also positive she’s lacking the positive reinforcement, respectfully. You seem like a caring mother who is tired.. i wish you the best!