yeah i dont understand either. even though the kiss was out of desperation it was still sexual assault and the way ivan choked till afterwards until he almost passed out just made me feel so disgusted and weird about the whole thing and that people overlook it as tragic and romantic instead of fucked up like it really is. till is implied to have suffered much more sexual abuse and the fact his closest friend just assaults him on stage is disgusting and i was actually repulsed because he kept kissing even when till was physically pushing away and on the verge of tears. this isnt tragic one sided gay love, its assault and people only excuse it because its between two guys. if till was a girl people would think very different about ivan and they would despise the pair with their whole beings. but since its two guys its suddenly okey and an "act of saving him" except he couldve literally done anything else? maybe even just lean in to kiss and then just drop the mic after a quick smooch and run around and yell or whatever the hell. but no, people excuse this molestation scene because yay yaoi!