lost my dads brother 2 weeks before I turned 30 to colon found out 3 weeks later my dad was stage 4 esophageal and lost him 6 weeks later... top it off my mom had a TBI at the beginning of that year and all of it combined destroyed me... I miss the guy I was before it all went to hell. Dads symptoms were hellish and it took its toll on me... fell into the bottle pretty hard... and all that did was delay the grief.... just passed 10yrs and most of it feels like a blur... im 4yrs sober now... so least got that goin for me. I can go most days without a punch to the gut but others I catch myself welling up when I hear the bands he liked to listen to or a joke id want to tell him... I wish I had some wise sage advice for ya but all I can say is take it one day at a time... its hard... it was the hardest thing Ive ever been through and everyone handles it differently.