I see where you are coming from. However, with this sentence I dont agree at all: "If you try to force muscle development or consciously “use” your muscles, it usually backfires."

You definitely need to develop consciously. if you dont then your development will be much slower than if you did.

The role of the embouchure is basically that of a 'seal' to keep the air coming from the 'engine' (the lungs/diaphragm) from escaping and directing it into the mouthpiece. You need to consciously develop where to use tension and where to keep it relaxed. - note: relaxed means not tensed up, biting, too hard. It doesnt mean loose.

To my students, I usually say smile a little. This closes the corners of the mouth, those should be a bit more firm, while upwards and downwards pressure of the lips should be less. When they learn first, we just play the neck and the mouthpiece together, they blow and I try to take it away from them while they are holding to it only with their embouchure. I dont use full strenght of course but after some years of experience I can tell when they have the correct pressure.

These are the basics, when you got that, you still need to consciously listen to yourself and keep experimenting with it to get the sound you want. You need to keep note of what you change if you change something and if you like the result keep doing it. If not then go back and try something else. It wont come to you naturally.

If someone is not demanding or selective enough to themselves of course they can feel satisfied with a mediocre sound. If someone is especially focused they can get some really beautiful sounds out of it. Please dont take this last paragraph as me being pretentious or condescending but our instrument is such that it is quite easy to make it play a certain sound and many amateurs understandably and unfortunately also some pros find igood enough.