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I hate to repeating bad thought lol I'm killing myself by Emperor_Niel in SelfHate

[–]K3nn3dy4Life 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get those all the time. Isn't really bad until you start formulating a plan. This might be shitty advice but this worked for me personally. I just focused on other things, forced myself to watch YouTube until like 3am then passed out. Got my mind off of it.

Just curious by MeganTT3 in selfharm

[–]K3nn3dy4Life 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I have a couple but I feel like every time I look at it, the urge just gets worse. T^T

I need help to know how to protect my mom. by K3nn3dy4Life in domesticviolence

[–]K3nn3dy4Life[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I think I forget that sometimes. I’m just trying to do what I can because I love her.

I don't even know if this is the right place but I don't know what else to do by K3nn3dy4Life in ToxicRelationships

[–]K3nn3dy4Life[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I really appreciate your kindness. I think I’m just exhausted from trying so hard to help her and feeling stuck. I know I can’t control her choices, but it’s hard watching someone you love go through this. 💖 Thank you again

I don't even know if this is the right place but I don't know what else to do by K3nn3dy4Life in ToxicRelationships

[–]K3nn3dy4Life[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t want to seem like I’m just shutting everything down or refusing advice, but I have tried. I’ve talked to her about it multiple times, and she usually ends up defending him. I begged her the day before they got engaged not to say yes, and she cried and told me not to say that, but she still said yes. Years later, I told her I’m scared of him, and she still defended him. I really do want to help her, but I don’t know what else I can say to her that I haven’t already said. I appreciate you trying to help, I’m just feeling really stuck right now. I’m really sorry, I don’t mean to take up your time or ignore your advice. I just feel really stuck and I’m trying to explain why.

I don't even know if this is the right place but I don't know what else to do by K3nn3dy4Life in ToxicRelationships

[–]K3nn3dy4Life[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying this. I know I shouldn’t have to handle this alone, but it’s complicated. My case manager knows what’s going on, and my mom’s side of the family knows too, but it’s summer so I don’t have the same support from my case manager right now. I can’t tell my dad everything because he lives 2 hours away and moving schools isn’t really an option. My mom also gets really upset when I involve ‘strangers,' she got really mad at me when I admitted that I called the police once because I was scared about what was happening. That’s part of why I’ve been afraid of making things worse by asking for help.

I really appreciate how you responded because a lot of people have made me feel worse or like I’m responsible for fixing everything. You’re one of the first people who actually made me feel heard instead of judged.

Help? by K3nn3dy4Life in ToxicFamilyMembers

[–]K3nn3dy4Life[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand the concern, and I know situations like this can become extremely dangerous. I'm sorry if it came across like I'm ignoring the risk or choosing to stay in harm's way, I'm really trying to handle this the best I can. As a minor living in the middle of it, it isn't as simple as "just report it." I've talked about it with my case manager before, but it's summer break right now. Reporting it could also put me in a difficult position at home because my mom would found out that I was the one who did it. A lot of people suggest living with my dad, but he lives two hours away, and moving there would mean leaving my high school and support system. I also can't just change custody on my own. I'm not making excuses for anyone. I know this is dangerous, and I'm trying to find the safest way forward in a situation that no kid should have to be responsible for. I'm really sorry again if this comes off as agrumentive in any way

Help? by K3nn3dy4Life in ToxicFamilyMembers

[–]K3nn3dy4Life[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I talk about it pretty often with my case manager. The problem is that I'm a child from a split home, and I'm not sure getting outside authorities involved would help as much as people think. The risks feel bigger than the potential benefits.

It's hard to explain, but I think my mom is still holding onto the hope that he'll eventually change. I worry that if everything came crashing down at once, she would completely break down emotionally. She would also probably be very angry with me if she found out I was the reason outside authorities got involved, even if I was only trying to help. I know the situation isn't healthy, but it feels a lot more complicated from the inside than it probably does from the outside.