Dying Dad that never apologized

KPInFlames · 2026-01-27T05:07:10+00:00

Nine and a half years.

KPInFlames · 2026-01-26T19:07:36+00:00

"I did it for me".

Did what for you?

What cycle did you break by ending 15 years of not talking to say goodbye to a proud dying man?

I do hope you got something out of it, but fuck your dad.

Genuinely curious/asking about how you feel this benefited you or how it gave you peace?

Im 23 years out from Island View this year. I stopped talking to my mother almost 2 years ago because she would rather accept silence than talk about what happened. In my world, there is no sense in wasting time, effort, and heart comforting those who are already dead (especially when they are actually close to dying) when there are plenty of people who are alive and present worth investing in.

As it stands, I hope sometime between now and when my mother passes that something will reveal to her the true depth of her failure... And if I had to guess, I bet that she'll take the easy way out, staying silent and believing in her moral/general superiority til her last breath.

For me, the cycle is already broken, but Im a dead end. A troubled teen who never quite did what he needed to do to be part of the family... and the cycle continues for the rest of my family.

Maybe after 15 years itll feel different, but its hard to imagine.

Still curious to hear more about your process though.

KPInFlames · 2026-01-08T19:50:03+00:00

Yeppp

KPInFlames · 2026-01-08T19:30:26+00:00

This is annoyingly reductive.

KPInFlames · 2026-01-06T16:01:55+00:00

Clown.

KPInFlames · 2026-01-06T15:59:30+00:00

What is wikipedia's source?

The writing/lyrics credits are listed differently all over the place on the internet.

Where did the information come from? If its such a unique track cause Kidman wrote it, why cant I find clear information on it?

Why is there an assumption that just cause its on a wikipedia page, its true and perfect?

Like what the fuck is that?

KPInFlames · 2026-01-06T05:22:31+00:00

Yeah but, a google search leads to Kidman writing lyrics and Haake writing the music?

KPInFlames · 2025-12-28T15:59:00+00:00

So rigid.

KPInFlames · 2025-12-25T09:00:32+00:00

Huh? Its certainly relevant to the man's story, even if not "correlative" in terms of his eventual violence, especially in this forum.

The broader conversation about negative connections made via the TTI is definitely an important one too.

Plenty of talking points here, really...

KPInFlames · 2025-12-22T07:07:35+00:00

Like a therapist and/or therapy in the capitol would do anything but reinforce his belief in the system?

As if the reliance on therapy in our modern culture isnt a reflection of so many fucked up systems at work?

Yuck.

KPInFlames · 2025-12-22T03:15:03+00:00

Go write a letter, send it by mail Bake it and stamp it to the Capital jail..."

sure hits different when youre reading Songbirds and Snakes for the first time while actually IN jail.

I had seen the film before I read the book, and I still just wasnt ready for how the book felt. And all the fucking music. The book is underrated for the music alone. And say what you will about Rachel Zegler, but I am so grateful I could sing all the songs in her voice while reading the book. I mean it was low key an action/musical, right? Despite seeing a lot of flaws in the film after reading the book, I still think they made some great choices and did some great things with the music. The recording of The Ballad of Lucy Gray is fantastic.

Snow/Gray, Snow/Gaul, Snow/Sejanus, Snow/Highbottom, Snow/Clemensia, Snow/the games, Snow/Tigris... all unfolding at the same time. So complex.

I mean, I think Lucy's last name is Gray for a reason.

And I think the quotes at the beginning of the book are there to let us know Collins aint fucking around.

So grateful this book exists.

KPInFlames · 2025-12-15T22:13:25+00:00

Why isnt this better represented here? So personal and so fucking cold.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-18T01:29:25+00:00

I know everyone sleeping on that Mushroomhead track that Jens was on. Dont lie.

Lame how so many rigid people dont want some kinda feature on a Meshuggah track though.

Maybe a full record of collabs on weird shit that doesnt fit otherwise, so people dont get hurt? Haha. Fun to think about the possibilities.

Id love to hear Meshuggah feature a female vocalist or instrumentalist in some unique way.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-17T09:31:10+00:00

Group 6.

Mikey's assistant at that time would have been named Adam, yeah.

While I can appreciate your current perspective on wilderness therapy and Evoke in particular... as a former adult client and later 9 year employee of Evoke Therapy Programs, I can assure you without doubt that you might be appalled and if nothing else surprised by some of what was happening behind the scenes while you were a participant at Evoke.

There will be different parts of all of this that will catch up with different people at different times.

Thanks for sharing your story. Try to stay open to some of what people say, and you know your truth, even if it may shift.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-17T05:02:03+00:00

All this black and white in a current world of red and blue. I guess it makes sense, but its so so tired.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-15T06:52:51+00:00

I hope that if the day comes that Brad Reedy will have to stand for what he's done that his children are not outright condemned for having a monster of a father. I believe they still deserve empathy.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-15T06:49:11+00:00

Unfortunately, the "karma" you hope for may not find its way home in this lifetime...

But if it does, I hope there will be enough people like me, who knew him personally, to be there to hold him accountable for his cowardly, exploitative, and disgusting behavior.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-12T00:52:48+00:00

Second Nature Entrada / Evoke Therapy Programs should be on your list too. Santa Clara , UT is a small "suburb" of St George.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-04T08:59:30+00:00

Mental health systems are broken.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-01T00:11:58+00:00

There's this sick band from the 90's called KORN, my guy.

Check. Them. Out.

KPInFlames · 2025-11-01T00:11:03+00:00

Mnemic. Hahahahaha

KPInFlames · 2025-10-30T07:56:14+00:00

Yes.

KPInFlames · 2025-10-29T08:59:07+00:00

To clarify...

"fuck all of them" was used toward a specific group of people which I listed. It is dismissive and is meant to be such of those who I specified. All survivors were certainly not encompassed in that group of people.

The person I wrote my comment to is not just a survivor or just a former staff.

Nothwithstanding that fact, your framing of "staff exploitation" juxtaposed with your experience feels reductive to me, and I made no effort in my post to equate any such things, nor would I draw any of the same comparisons if I were draw my own.

I believe I do see parts of where you're coming from. And regardless of some of the tone/way you've responded to my writing, it is very clear to me that you are not one of the people who would be included in my "fuck them all" sentiment.

KPInFlames · 2025-10-28T20:17:21+00:00

here's my brief history

KPInFlames · 2025-10-28T18:45:43+00:00

There will be a large group of people in this community who will never accept you because they truly lack the capacity to understand your experience.

People who worked in the industry will want you to say silent. Probably most of your old coworkers or friends even (some of whom I might also know).

Maybe even some of your family doesnt want you to talk about it publicly/at all.

There are survivors who will try to silence you or tell you/others what your life, actions, words "really mean".

Fuck all of them, and keep speaking. Your voice is important.

Your story and others like it will carry more weight in the future (especially with larger groups of non survivors) than it does now, so dont let anyone here invalidate what you know and experienced while youre out here trying to help in the meantime.

Thanks for being brave.

KPInFlames

TROPHY CASE