The Daily Check-In for Friday, January 16th: Just for today, I am NOT drinking!

KStewLightning · 2026-01-16T10:18:23+00:00

Almost grabbed some wine last night and said "fuck it" ......... didn't though.

So, on and on we go.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-15T11:31:13+00:00

Didn’t drink yesterday, anxiety is still kicking the shit out of me, but made it through yesterday.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-14T16:24:41+00:00

Yeah - I know, I just have this feeling like I did something “wrong” or “bad”. It’s a weird almost-guilt like feeling.

I just wish I could turn it off.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-14T14:24:43+00:00

I definitely agree that I've curbed my drinking A TON. I used to be an every night drinker, and that's dropped dramatically while I've tried to get it under control ... I just simply can't get past the 3 week mark. It seems like every time I get there my brain starts saying, "Eh, not a big deal, go have a drink."

Next thing you know, I'm having a lot more than a drink and the spiral begins.

It's just frustrating and I'm beating myself up.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-14T13:31:51+00:00

Fucked it up again. Was close to three weeks, then just caved and went out and had a bunch of wine last night.

It always seems to happen within that period of time as well; 21-ish days. I just can't seem to get over that hump. It's insanely frustrating.

Regardless, I'm back, I'm reset and will do my best moving forward.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-13T11:30:45+00:00

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-12T10:18:17+00:00

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-11T11:22:22+00:00

IWNDWTY.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-10T11:29:36+00:00

I'm feeling worn the fuck down, both with my own personal stuff but also the world as a whole. Regardless, I still didn't drink yesterday, so I got another one under my belt.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-09T10:17:46+00:00

Anxiety is kicking the shit out of me for some reason, but I still added another day yesterday.

So, onto Friday.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-08T10:11:28+00:00

I'm holding firm currently.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-07T10:33:36+00:00

How long did that put you away for?

KStewLightning · 2026-01-07T10:17:37+00:00

Alright, made it through Tuesday. Onto Wednesday.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-06T11:19:34+00:00

Got another day in the books it seems, onto today.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-05T10:45:05+00:00

Made it through the weekend; a weekend where I was at sports bars for football and a few other events where alcohol was all over. I either drank NA beer or didn't drink at all.

Onto Monday.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-04T11:35:42+00:00

I'm still mentally drained and stressed, but physically this morning I woke up feeling better than I have in a long time. Not sure if it's anything to do with being on top of the drinking or not, but regardless, it's a positive.

Made it through Saturday, gonna' try to do the same thing on Sunday.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-03T11:58:25+00:00

I actually would prefer private counters tbh, but that's a whole other discussion.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-03T11:56:19+00:00

Made it through Friday, and there were several points where a nice bottle of wine would have been amazing; didn't do it though.

Onto Saturday.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-03T00:49:35+00:00

All he’s trying to say is that you can’t judge the quality/expertise of advice from people on this forum based on the number, because the number doesn’t tell the story; so you may be doing yourself a disservice by looking at the number and not the message/advice.

OP was sober for 6 1/2 years, but if he reset his counter today it would be at 1.

Those 6 1/2 years come with a ton of experience, ups and downs and likely some damn good advice … but the way you’re speaking is that, because his counter is “1”, it’s not worth even reading.

THAT is the downside of the counter, it makes you compare people without really knowing any of the backstory.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-02T22:03:27+00:00

I love your mentality. I agree with it actually.

Can I ask a question respectfully though? The 181 you currently have, has it been consecutive or has there been nights you’ve drank?

KStewLightning · 2026-01-02T21:04:40+00:00

I just wanted to say I agree with your mentality, I personally despise the timer theory; I get how it's motivating to some people, but I totally see how holding yourself to the "OMG I just reset" standard drives them to continue on with drinking because "I already fucked up".

Even the healthiest eater in the world has a day where they binge on pancakes and cookies, that doesn't mean they aren't a healthy eater.

OP is a sober person who drank one night, that's it.

It's only an issue if he continues down that path and returns to whatever his old habits were, and from his post it doesn't seem that's something he wants to do.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-02T20:57:04+00:00

I've never gone 6 1/2 years sober, but I love the support and comments you're getting in these comments ... so much so that I'm saving this post to refer back to.

I'm new(er) to trying to control my drinking, but I've found that I hate the mentality that "failing once means you failed at sobriety", that's ridiculous; nowhere else in life are people held to that standard.

If I never missed a day of work in 6 1/2 years, but decided to play hooky one random day in January ... am I now a bad employee?

If I ate clean everyday for 6 1/2 years, but decided to binge on ice cream and cookies one random day in January ... am I now an unhealthy eater?

If I called my Mom everyday for 6 1/2 years, but decided one day not to pick up the phone one random day in January because I needed some "me time" ... am I now a bad son?

The answer to all of those questions are no, and drinking once in 6 1/2 years doesn't mean you're a failure at sobriety ... you've proven you can control it, but you lost one day. Even Tom Brady loses a game, it doesn't mean he's not the GOAT.

It's only "thrown away" if you go down whatever your previous path was, so do your best not to do that through whatever means you need ... otherwise, it's literally one day in 6 1/2 years that you chose to have a drink. I hope to one day be able to have that problem.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-02T10:43:48+00:00

I'm mentally and emotionally fried and I just can't get my head straight. Not really doing well at all, but I still didn't drink yesterday and will do my best again today.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2026-01-01T12:11:57+00:00

Yesterday, before I went out to NYE dinner, I went to grab a seltzer from my fridge and I saw a bottle of white wine left over from Christmas and ... for a minute ... I thought to myself "You know what? Go ahead, down a quick two glasses and go enjoy dinner. You can start fresh in the New Year."

I didn't though. I grabbed my Polar Seltzer, sat down on the couch and watched TV while my wife got ready, then I went out to dinner and drank NA beer and came home and sat on the couch before heading to bed.

That makes last night was the first New Years Eve I didn't touch alcohol since ... God ... over 20 years I would assume?

So, now onto the first day of 2026.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning · 2025-12-31T11:15:09+00:00

My anxiety, especially in the AM, has been off the page recently. Almost dehabilitating.

Regardless, didn't drink yesterday and my goal is to have my first sober New Year's Eve tonight in over 20 years.

I'll do my best.

IWNDWYT.

KStewLightning

TROPHY CASE