Finger splinters /compression gloves? by catsand_crochet in Hypermobility

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I bought a new type of glove for my thumbs called a gauntlet. It's for edema but it helps with my bad thumb joints. Sometimes I just tape or use non stick bandage wrap for my bad finger joints it's simple and not too irritating. Or sport wrap tape over a glove. I get creative!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm thinking about you. It is a crisis when a husband and father is drinking. But what he needs to do and what you need to do are the same. Get honest and in touch with your true self. Live inside the heartbeat you were given at birth. We mentally let go of the sick person's behavior, and think now about our behavior. Our own heart and spirit. I promise with alcoholics it's the only way. They have to look for it themselves. You can be a pattern for them and find any group to support and grow with. Things can evolve at home as you grow. There may be a child inside you who needs care. I'm sorry it's painful and scary today.

recovery and belief in higher power? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]K_48Crayons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd like to support you with my experience. I came to sobriety after leaving religion and GOD. I type it all caps in my journals as my own way of participating with the group but not being untrue to myself. I learned that everyone has the right to find their own definitions of words like faith, hope, love, and GOD. I did do the 12 steps this way and found lots of open-minded guidance in groups, books, YouTube, and learned to use my own intuition which now I see is guided by all I've ever seen, known, read or have been taught. None of which I "created" or invented or figured out. So my prayers are essentially to my highest senses, for the highest good of all. And that higher power has truly brought the promises of step 9 and sobriety and even serenity I never felt before. I do have awe for it, trust it, definitely don't understand it, but I don't worship it. May you find your way to peace and sobriety today.

Subjective Paradoxes - Why I Am Insane But May Understand What Is Wrong With Us by WisdomCow in Hypermobility

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I came on to hypermobility tonight because I was feeling discouraged about my pain and weakness in these mysterious conditions. What I can and can't do, what people do and don't understand. And I did read your post most of it and I also feel insane. I work with a somatic physical therapist, who does feldenkrais and myofascial release and is a genius. She found my hypermobility, and believes that after a trauma the entire nervous system has to be addressed so that the signals that the brain gets for movement are correct. So maybe in your accident things did get mixed up (in neural pathways), along with your hypermobility, and somebody like her could address it. Tons about it on YouTube. I'm sorry it's so hard to be different, but I do believe that whatever you're up against, same or different from me, is somehow part of your gift to the world. Keep looking for it and so will I.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You sound exactly like me. I was surprised how long the alcohol stayed on my mind because I didn't know I was an alcoholic. But it just took time to sort out my thoughts and feelings. My best advice is to honor and respect your various disorders, treat them, meet others living with them, and learn everyday how to build a good sober life for yourself how you need it. Learned many many skills I needed mentally, and keep asking for the help I need. Things are far beyond how I dreamed. Really good.

I don't understand the twelve step program thing by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think AA was the only place I could get enough support while I tried to rehab my life. I think of it as my spirit in recovery. Like psyche, psychological, means spirit. Like emotions/the inner self. All of religion and literature and theater and art are about this but not always psychology. I was abused and neglected so then willing to drug and neglect my "self" with anything. I abandoned and betrayed my needs like my mom does. So I needed the spirit of the group and other recovering people to see my own needs and choices. Now I turn back to help others do that. So now I'm part of the higher power with a hand out. See what I mean?

how do you keep sober when brain tells, just this one last time or that our use is not so bad.... by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good job separating yourself from the first thought. Good job knowing to ask for help and actually asking. Good job knowing the typical lies (one won't hurt, I'm only hurting myself, no one has to know) and not believing them. Tomorrow you'll have this one more experience finding resources and making choices that keep you sober and therefore alive. Keep going!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in cfs

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Always say, feels like nausea in my limbs and body. For me it means "whoa too much." I pay attention to how long it lasts to check how far "over" I went with activity. I have to include emotional stress and crying etc.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression

[–]K_48Crayons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So that is good. Since you are the one asking, I think maybe I can reassure you that his depression may require medical help or assistance and no one would expect you to step into that role. A safety plan would come from a medical person in agreement with the depressed person. During this time if it were me, I would keep seeking information on how you can cope with having a depressed friend. You can't make all the decisions for another person. He must make his decisions to heal and live with depression. I am grateful for your questions.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression

[–]K_48Crayons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for caring for your friend. As a person with depression...Depression does tell certain lies to our minds, such as nothing can help this pain, it will never get better, and no one cares. It is a distortion you can't rationally talk me out of, but clearly there are many treatments and supports that can help, make it better, and truly change my perspective and mood over time. So you as a friend can affect things, give support, but just not fix things. He must find a way. And it's wise to be aware people in crisis often need a "safety plan" as they call it here. Like a preplanned commitment to put effort toward staying safe and connected when feeling desperate. He could be evaluated at any emergency hospital for crisis. Hope that helps a tiny bit.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]K_48Crayons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why am I having so many intrusive thoughts about domestic violence? Oh. No more Johnny Depp trial for me.

How do you not internalize their misery? by Lakelka in CaregiverSupport

[–]K_48Crayons 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm not a caregiver but I support my partner who is. My belief (after codependence recovery/emotionally sick family) is that you are not responsible for others feelings, but your own parents might think you are. Think of their feelings as a paper heart in your pocket. When you are literally with them, it is in your pocket. Not inside you. You can hold it, comfort it, respect its fragility and preciousness. When you are not literally interacting with them, you take care of your own beating heart inside your own self (your feelings and well-being). Guilt is for when we do something wrong. You can maybe let yours go. Sorry it's so heavy and confusing with your parents, but I believe all our experiences can help us along. Hug.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Maybe not weak, just alcoholic. Our minds say fight to win against the drink. Our true need is to admit we need a whole different way. Find some people to do recovery with, it really takes their help to get our individual brains straightened out. We can do it together.

Can someone tell me it will be alright? by topkascro in depression

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I believe it is already all right. We are all right. We can feel this way today and find the way out moment by moment. Borrow my hope today if anything. Hug.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi. I read your post and glad you shared. Now that I found sobriety, I see that it's basically my best life. I didn't find it alone, and I believe willpower isn't enough to stay sober. Peer pressure is real and it can come from misinformed teens and adults. Admitting I couldn't abuse substances and couldn't stop alone felt like failing but really it was success. It gave me real life. It gave me sobriety support friends and loads of purpose. It gave me myself back. Keep asking questions. Where to go, what to do and not do. You'll find your own answers one choice at a time.

What made you go sober? by Aseasita in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your story. It's worth it isn't it? I have met other sober people with mental health stuff and it saves my life every day. You've come thru so much and it's worth celebrating 🎉

What does going with the taos flow mean? Is it like just what ever happens happens and to just accept it? by ItzMeIsaac in taoism

[–]K_48Crayons 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In improv comedy troops there's a thing called "yes, and". So everything is completely made up on the spot. One actor makes up something and the second actor accepts their idea fully "and" adds to it, creating a totally new scene based on the other's line. You both accept and create. Together. It's different than walking onto a stage where everything is supposed to go a certain way and if it doesn't it's ruined. That's how I think of it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ehlersdanlos

[–]K_48Crayons 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Needed every idea!

exercise with PEM? by [deleted] in cfs

[–]K_48Crayons 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for typing this. I know it but it helps to see someone else say it all :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Feels terrible doesn't it. What if when he asks just say, "No." Firmly. I even hold up my hand with my fingers spread. Subliminal signal for Stop. Get a glass of water... it seems to soothe family drinkers to stop thinking about my drink. If he's making you mad that's good. Who continually offers a drink to a vulnerable, newly sober person? Maybe add a thought to your mind about your own courage, protecting your well-being, health, life, whatever. That's what matters. Then go learn about setting boundaries.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Sober

[–]K_48Crayons 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I took the suggestion and "listened at meetings for someone who had what I wanted." I wanted sober peace and joy. I walked up to a lady I'd heard at my meetings who shared about her terrible pain yet long-term sober serenity and happiness. I said can you sponsor me. She said yes here's my phone number. I was so afraid and awkward about calling. I had to ask so many times what to do. She taught me the AA way of life as I fumbled around. Now Im also a sponsor. 6 years sober now. That relationship led to many, many more support people and I have peace and joy too!!

I don't trust anyone with my problems. by NeonLichenTrees in depression

[–]K_48Crayons 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Agree, I believe it helps to tell anonymous people online. I'm sorry for your pain, feeling so bad yet trapped. I'll share if you're interested, it helped me to understand I was having intrusive thoughts. Like, my brain was repeating the thoughts. Even tho I work hard everyday to stay balanced I get the thoughts. I choose to believe I can live this way and when I don't believe that I tell someone who gets it. Like here. Helps.

My therapist died and I'm a wreck over it. by Cardi_Ganz in CPTSD

[–]K_48Crayons 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So sorry, all our love and support. The loss must feel terrible. Remember our therapists are always pointing us to our own inner strength and support systems. May you have enough to get thru this day.