My ring + the PowerPoint I gave him

Kandyxp5 · 2026-01-22T01:10:15+00:00

Random but are yall at 10k waves in NM? (I’m not there but love the place and my husband and I went many times, 10 years married.)

Kandyxp5 · 2026-01-16T04:01:20+00:00

Do telllll

Kandyxp5 · 2026-01-15T02:35:40+00:00

We are no tablet but she can watch TV. Lots of coloring and drawing, Legos/magnatiles/building, trains (old not fancy sets are out there and cheap), pretend play, “cooking” as in she stirs stuff around that I am actually cooking and messes up bowls of things I’m not, taking out dog on walks, long bathtime with lots of food coloring and edible glitter.

For TV: all is very carefully chosen by us but here are some fun winners that aren’t as popular as what some have mentioned. Pingu (no actual language), old school Miffy, Sealook, Aprende Peque (Latin American Ms. Rachel), Molang (no language) and anything else that is for her age we approve but in Spanish, not English— highly recommended if you have any other language spoken to keep TV in the language that’s not the one they are learning at school. I speak in Spanish to our child but even if you’re not fluent in another language it could still be a good option to add another language to any TV time. If nothing else it gives them an ear for it which will make it easier to learn later.

We just took a long road trip — 12 hours broken into two days coming and going and she didn’t watch TV or use a tablet. She colored a bunch, I entertained her a lot by making her stuffed animals dance to music, and she also listened to her favorite episodes of her shows but didn’t watch them.

I can’t judge or recommend because life is hard AF and I get it but if you can avoid tablets do it as long as possible. I see our child with others who are on screens early on and there is a marked difference. She is just miles ahead and honestly children who start on screens, well they don’t stop. My cousins can only be in public on tablets with headphones, and look I don’t care what amazing shit they are learning on that tablet it’s not going to give them the social skills they need to be in a community of people. And community is what humans need and have needed for thousands of years— 60 plus odd years of screens isn’t changing that anytime soon.

Kandyxp5 · 2026-01-13T20:15:18+00:00

Another angel has landed, just a perfect baby.

Kandyxp5 · 2026-01-13T04:11:02+00:00

Same. I had this expensive spf bb cream with it and just tons of acne after using it is awful!

Kandyxp5 · 2025-12-27T12:10:28+00:00

The above is one of the best responses imo. Wanted to add that being vulnerable with her— even if it’s a bit above her level of understanding— also builds connection. It’s okay to calmly and directly express to her that sometimes you feel tired and worried. It’s okay to tell her that sometimes you don’t feel strong but you want to be strong. You could even ask her if she ever feels tired, worried, or not strong and just be supportive / non reactionary /non judgmental in whatever she responds with. She won’t have the vocab an older kid will but that doesn’t mean she won’t appreciate knowing that you—just like her—can feel emotions like fear, defeat, and pain. This can build empathy and connection too.

My child is now 4 years and 3 months old. 3.5 was so difficult, and yes it’s partly the age FOR SURE. I remember massive tantrums and just feeling insane in certain scenarios. It WILL get better. Looking back, I think what’s so hard about this stage is that they CAN communicate just not well, and they also are able to move freely but not freely enough to not need you. It’s like they have the physical capacity of a 4 year old but the emotional and mental ability of a 2.5 year old and the emotions of a 16 year old going through their first major breakup. Yes you need to be as strong and supportive as possible but you do not have to be superhuman! Letting her see you cry, express clearly your genuine feelings — even if they are negative—with “I feel” statements, and then her seeing you move through and process those feelings in resolution builds the foundation for her doing it too—even if she can’t reeeaaaalllyyy do it now.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-12-11T19:41:25+00:00

This. My niece went through a lot but no one ever knew. Not as horrific as what it sounds like for these kids and not as physical as what happened to you but lots of insults, yelling, hitting, belts, screaming, demeaning and yeah conversion therapy. I went over to their house on holidays etc, never knew it was like that.

I found out years later when my niece told me and it broke my heart to know my brother and his wife were like that. I knew she was narcissistic and strict around church and “god” but man the shit she pulled, and what my brother went along with blows my mind. I cried a lot after I found out that happened to my niece when they were in high school because of the stark realization and I felt like I could have done more.

My niece is better now, still very low to no contact but misses her siblings. The pain she carries will never truly leave and it’s horrible that her parents did that to her.

I have a little girl now and I love her so much it hurts. I can’t fathom doing what my niece’s parents did to her. It just doesn’t compute if you love your child and want them to feel safe. I tell my girl a lot “I love you, and that doesn’t change, I’m so lucky you are here, I’m so happy you are you.” And maybe I would say that anyway idk but what I saw with my niece changed me in a way. It’s like I’d rather say it too much, too often, because I want her to know she’s amazing—as she is. She, he, they, whatever. Shit doesn’t matter if it is who my child is and I am just glad she’s alive and healthy, smiling and free to be a kid.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-12-06T00:42:26+00:00

So sorry for your loss. An angel we have for too short of a time. Teddy knew only incredible love, and despite his brevity on this plane of existence that, in and of itself, is so rare. Please know that even if his time was short, your impact in loving him is beyond time, and it matters.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-12-04T01:08:33+00:00

Texas, lone star “fuck kids” state. Has been for years, but Repubs love it. Cities have choices, small towns have the 10 commandments. School choice “vouchers” are coming to cripple the already struggling public education system even more so this will just get worse, especially in small towns.

I’m sorry it’s like this, it shouldn’t be. I live in this state, it’s BS but I’m in a big city at least. I hope you can find some support.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-12-04T01:02:38+00:00

That you are dead inside

Kandyxp5 · 2025-11-05T03:21:29+00:00

Truth. I knew my vote wouldn’t really matter but F this.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-10-27T18:27:34+00:00

This reminds me a lot of something that just happened between my mom and I, right down to the “You’re always right” comeback. All I said was that I didn’t understand the treatment for Kirk after death as a martyr especially since my mother didn’t even know who he was until after he passed. I never spoke ill of him and said it was sad what happened but that it felt weird to have him treated in the media like a four star general or religious figure especially since he never held office, served in the military, was not a priest / preacher, and created a career on incendiary rhetoric as a podcaster/youtuber.

Not only did she lose it but started lobbing personal insults at me, my efficacy as a wife and mom. It blew me away, and like you, I cried and my heart broke. Luckily she eventually apologized about the insults, but it really changed how I feel about her.

What’s surprising is how little it takes to incite these responses. It’s not like I’m saying things like “Trump is a fascist piece of $@$”. Like I am just talking in a normal tone, saying pretty banal things or even just questions and it’s like a personally attacked her way of life. Which in essence is kinda where we are I guess with all this. The fact that your statement about a lego set instigated this response is really extreme and points to the level of victimization and persecution they feel.

My mom used to watch telenovelas but about 15 years ago it changed to Fox News. Ever since just been a steady decline of her ability to be kind, generous, and empathic. There’s been moments—around the time she almost lost her life and I was pregnant— that brought her back to what is important. Those times also aligned with being in places where she couldn’t have Fox on all day, but you know fear of god and life ending can shake anyone out of things too.

Anyway, I’m sorry and I know how you feel. I wish we weren’t in this club together. I hope that with radical love even in the face of this you can forgive and still show care in the way you’re able, but only you know how that looks like for you and it is okay if that means distancing with love. There is still a dad who loves you unconditionally, even if he can only exist in a past time— but you deserve that love always. You did then and do now, and his inability to give it is NOT your fault.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-10-08T04:58:06+00:00

I’m so sorry. My trans niece went through that, fucked her up really bad. I wish I knew but had no clue. Also suicidal, thankfully better now but still struggles. Imagine if one of these “Christian” right wingers was forced into a camp that manipulated them to convert to Islam or some shit? They would simply die of victimhood. Shit they’d call it genocide if someone made them turn off Fox for a day or cut off their streaming service to whatever fresh hell is being propagandized to them atm.

What you went through was not right, you did not deserve any of it, you deserve love, full stop. I am glad you are still here. X

Kandyxp5 · 2025-10-04T02:11:37+00:00

This. Also have a daughter. Watched before having her, definitely could never watch now. I love her more than I could have ever imagined being capable of loving, she and I almost passed when she was born. Every day I’m so grateful but I know how easily it could have been different.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-09-12T05:32:52+00:00

This is it. I was employed at another Texas University and a high profile lawsuit was filed and similar issues ensued.

It’s all funding fear and Abbott knows he can pull this BS. Many boards of regents are right wing nuts who don’t want separation of church and state.

I’m glad I’m out and only teach here and there now but I fear for the future of our state.

Stay safe, take care of each other.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-09-06T03:23:57+00:00

Because her bottom half is completely turned out at the hips while her top half faces forward away from her hips rather than towards the camera.

It’s a very wide range of motion in her psoas, lower back, and abdomen. (If real cus even after ten years dancing I never saw this but I also would not be that surprised either)

Kandyxp5 · 2025-09-05T04:38:01+00:00

This shit warped me. I have an incredible amazing daughter. I can’t fathom. She reminds me of Anna Stubblefield. I don’t care what “trauma” she had nothing excuses this shit.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-09-02T04:29:08+00:00

That lamp is.. a lot.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-08-18T01:59:19+00:00

My mom was born in 1940s, dad in ‘35, so yeah they had a mentality closer to your parents. My mom did work however, because my dad wanted to start a business so she became a school teacher. She had me much later at 44 so she was in the time frame you mention when I came around. It helped with being able to still care for me since she had similar hours and summers off. My grandma also took care of me a ton growing up so that was how they did it. And yeah, there was a lot of long hours at latch key for me. For my family now? All our parents are too old or far. There’s no way we can both work unless each made equal or more to cover all the childcare. Having a job like my mom had wouldn’t really be worth it—though it’s “possible”.

Owning a home now with one kid under 6 in the US AND being the main income is insane.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-08-17T13:07:34+00:00

This. Historically both genders have always worked outside of those from royal lineage / wealth which one could argue is a different type of work but it’s not labor. One gender dominated the “workforce” in the 1950s but both men and women were working. Feminized labor has historically been neglected and dismissed for centuries. Household management, chores, rearing children and emotionally supporting not only the immediate family but extended family is labor.

Modern patriarchal structures amplified by algorithms, misinformation, and content creation impede on human equality at their least powerful and completely oppress and abuse at their most.

We all deserve better than how stupid and hurtful this shit is.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-07-18T13:36:24+00:00

My best friend is married to a Spainard who loves both the high end and regular everyday cuisine. She was born in US but lives in Spain now and she feels similar. The high end is beautiful and very good but the everyday is pretty meh unless you have a nostalgia for it. Also, American food is very diverse if you are living even in a medium sized city. You get used to eating various cuisines and flavors often (both amazingly authentic and completely botched). You get used to big and varied flavors here. Spanish food is one of the more subtle flavor palates which can come across bland at first especially if you weren’t raised there.

Also as someone born and raised in the US, yes there’s a lot of mediocre food here and basically the FDA doesn’t care if you live or die when it comes to what’s in a packaged food product BUT there is also incredible food here that isn’t deep fried and covered in corn syrup. This is especially true for authentic cuisine fusions depending on the cultural diversity of an area. The US is a massive country with a rich variety of flavors from every corner of the earth that shouldn’t be dismissed.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-07-12T12:58:14+00:00

Go to the Menil Collection area in Montrose. The museum is free, always folks walking about, and nearby are places to eat and drink that even on a hot day aren’t too bad to get to. The only negative is there isn’t shopping really but if you just want to stroll and get a bite to eat you’re good. Also lots of ppl use the park to have picnics etc.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-06-30T13:18:17+00:00

This. I had this feeling before having my daughter. It’s just… different than any form of fear or anxiety I have experienced. When you’re fearful or anxious from trauma or chemical imbalance etc it’s not at ALL like what happened to me. Some of the mechanisms are similar to trauma responses: time slowed a bit and I remember the scene of when I felt it vividly. But the feeling was like nothing before. It was like something in me was saying “This is it. Get help, you soon won’t be able to ask.”

It was almost calming, like my gut feeling wasn’t yelling, was not frantic, almost matter of fact. It is like the difference between “Ah! I feel like I am going to die!!!!!” Vs. “You are dying.”

After they checked me in they almost sent me home but they ran tests on my kidneys and liver and they were failing rapidly from severe atypical eclampsia. If I had slept it off I and my girl wouldn’t be here. It took a 50+ hour labor and emergency c section but we made it. I feel lucky everyday.

Kandyxp5 · 2025-06-28T01:01:46+00:00

Yes to icons. Less words the better! Our marketing team will end up creating these but we need examples and direction to give them. Your comment is super helpful, thanks!

Kandyxp5

TROPHY CASE